Bloody 'ell
To whom it may concern I'm going to be mute for the next five or so days because I'm getting my alien-embryo-esque tonsils sliced out tomorrow and will be unable to speak for a while. I'm a bit concerned because:
1) I have a cold
2) The surgeon said "this may be the most painful experience of your life"
3) The post-surgical care brochure says things like "on day five or six, the membrane covering the tonsillectomy site will detach and you may bleed copiously from your nose and mouth. Do not be alarmed, this is normal." This is NOT normal, brochure!
4) How am I supposed to eat/drink if I can't swallow, which = the first, like, two days after surgery? Answer: I can basically sip water, milk, and like, blended peas, although I am supposed to prepare for, quote, "severe pain associated with swallowing" -courtesy of scary pessimistic pre-op nurse on phone.
And so I will probably revert to AIM (simian level communications) in my opiate-induced stupor of the next few days.
I leave you with shirtless-and-in-a-speedo pictures of Ricky Martin and his also absurdly fucking hot boyfrie--AHEM, male companion. The only way I could want to screw him more is if he didn't shamelessly wax his beautiful chest.
1) I have a cold
2) The surgeon said "this may be the most painful experience of your life"
3) The post-surgical care brochure says things like "on day five or six, the membrane covering the tonsillectomy site will detach and you may bleed copiously from your nose and mouth. Do not be alarmed, this is normal." This is NOT normal, brochure!
4) How am I supposed to eat/drink if I can't swallow, which = the first, like, two days after surgery? Answer: I can basically sip water, milk, and like, blended peas, although I am supposed to prepare for, quote, "severe pain associated with swallowing" -courtesy of scary pessimistic pre-op nurse on phone.
And so I will probably revert to AIM (simian level communications) in my opiate-induced stupor of the next few days.
I leave you with shirtless-and-in-a-speedo pictures of Ricky Martin and his also absurdly fucking hot boyfrie--AHEM, male companion. The only way I could want to screw him more is if he didn't shamelessly wax his beautiful chest.