(no subject)

[cosmicguppy]

it seems that a lot of people are havin kind of a ruff time lately. including myself. things seem really kinda weird. i don't know what goes on in others lives, but i can see that everyone has a lot of things on their minds or some of us nothing at all. I don't like seeing other people in pain, it's not something i get enjoyment out of, well....everyone once in awhile, J/K. Yea, things are weird. For awhile i thought that it was just stress, depression, lonilness, just facts of life. But it hit me the other night, as i talked to a very old near and dear friend of mine. All those things put together are symptoms of a life that has strayed from the path of God. As many, i find myself reluctant to admit some of my faults, but i have met them face to face and i have turned my back to them. I didn't go do drugs, i didn't get smashed every weekend, i didn't show hate to my friends or parents, in fact it was quite the opposite. i HAVE been living a decent lifestyle, just not pressing forward on the path i need to be on. I got comfortable and content. I figured if i live well, like my parents do, then i must have somewhat of a decent life. but my parents aren't happy; in fact i believe they are still in much pain, they just hate to show fault to each other. I've feared the future, i guess because i wished to stay where i am, nice and comfortable. but things don't work like that. I think it's time i put the importance in my life on what it needs to be, not work, not girls, not my friends, not school, not family. All these are still very close and meaningful to me (especially girls! hehe J/K). My friends mean a lot to me, they are my life line, and have many times provided me with much happiness, joy, and love. Dave, Will, Sarah, Heather, Nicole, Adam, Ryan, Lee, and my family all mean more than a life in this world to me. they have been a Jesus to me when i had trouble seeing. I would be lost without them, I'm very blessed. i thank them for the light they provide. well, time to read and have some quiet time.

"Dear Father, I need you,
Your strength my heart to mend.
I want to fly higher,
Every new day again." - FIF R.I.P.