Title: Impossible Possibilities [1/1]
Author:
DiamondinsanityRating: PG
Word Count: 1727
Pairings: Puck/Brittany, Puck/Rachel(or Quinn), Finn/Rachel(or Quinn)
Setting/Spoilers: Post-Sectionals. A good couple of months post-sectionals to be exact.
Notes: Alright, so this was originally supposed to be a Puck/Rachel anti-story, but as I wrote it, I realized that since it’s in 2nd person, it could very well be Quinn/Puck. So it’s both really. You can choose who you think it is watching. Also, I’ve never written anything so abstract before. It kind of freaks me out actually…
Summary: It’s impossible to hate Brittany, but at this moment in time, you hate her more than you’ve hated anyone else in your entire existence.
It’s impossible to hate Brittany, mostly because she’s Brittany. You find it really hard to hate somebody who is as naive as she is sometimes. It’s like hating a small child; it’s just not right. Brittany is basically the cutest girl in Lima, and how can you hate someone who radiates love and happiness from every pore? How can you hate a girl who set all the animals free at the shelter because she didn’t want them to be in animal jail? Even when she has her snarky moments, it’s really hard to hate her because you’re not sure if she thought up the insult herself or if she’s just repeating things she’s heard Santana say. Sometimes it’s really hard to tell. But right now? Right now you hate Brittany.
You stand there, staring in complete and utter horror as you watch her giggle, and then link her arms around Puck’s neck, pulling him in for a kiss. As much as you’d like to tell yourself that Puck was a brief fling and that you never felt anything for him, seeing him kiss Brittany in the middle of the hallway like this for everyone to see feels like a sucker punch. It’s not like you haven’t seen him kiss other girls. You’ve seen him kiss Santana, and a slew of other Cheerios whose names you can’t bring yourself to think about right now, but you’ve never seen him look so happy before and that’s what makes this so awful in your mind.
No one else really pays them any mind as Puck leans his forehead against Brittany’s and whispers something you can’t hear that makes her giggle, but you can’t tear your eyes away from them. A part of you had always thought that if your feelings for Finn ever fizzled out, Puck would be there to pick up the pieces. Because Finn is the perfect high school boyfriend, but Puck is the kind of guy you always saw yourself marrying, even if you’d never admit it out loud. And so seeing him look so happy with Brittany just about breaks your heart.
You feel more than see Finn standing next to you. When he notices your gaze, he starts talking. “Weird, right?” And he continues talking, even though you don’t remember encouraging him to continue. “She started following him around after the whole, well, you know.” He pauses for a moment and you realize he’s expecting you to say something, but all you can do is nod and continue to stare as Puck ruffles her hair. Since when does Puck ruffle hair anyway?
“She seemed to think he was sad or something and couldn’t be left alone. All I know is that Santana gave them her blessing even though I think she might have been dating both of them at the same time.” And now he sounds confused, but you don’t look over at him quite yet. “Or maybe, she was having sex with both of them. Brittany tried to explain to me this whole ‘sex is dating’ thing. Or maybe it was ‘sex is not dating.’ I can’t remember. All I know is that it was a big deal that she gave them her blessing.” He’s quiet for a minute, and you get the feeling this is one of his rare perceptive moments. “You never noticed?”
Now, you allow yourself to tear your gaze away from them, and look up at Finn, trying to force a smile on your face because it’s Finn, and he’s perfect and you’re supposed to be happy with Finn and not thinking about Puck, right? But you get this feeling that it’s a tradition for anyone who dates Finn to somehow develop feelings for Puck as well, and so you don’t even bother trying to hide your disappointment any more. Why bother? You know Finn already knows what’s going on; he’s used to it by now, too. “No.” You finally admit. “I was so busy watching you I stopped paying attention to him.”
He nods slowly as he watches his ex-best friend hoist Brittany over his shoulder and begin carrying her down the hallway as she screams and giggles in delight. “He’s happy.” And you’re not sure if Finn is just informing you of this, or if he’s warning you to stay away from Puck because he’s happy. Sometimes Finn is hard to read, and you know in times like these that he’s smarter than he lets on. And half the time you can’t help but wonder if he plays stupid to protect Puck and make him feel like the smarter and stronger one of the duo. The part that freaks you out is that they’re not even speaking and Puck betrayed him and he’s still protecting him. That’s Finn Hudson for you.
You let his words sink in as you watch Puck put Brittany down at the end of the hallway. Every inch of your body is screaming at you to look away as he leans down to kiss her, but you can’t. It’s like watching a train accident. The kiss isn’t that long but to you it feels like it takes eternity for Puck to break apart from Brittany and then to swing an arm over her shoulder and lead her out to the parking lot. As they leave, all you can think about is how much you hate her because you can tell by that look in his eyes that he has no plans on breaking up with her any time soon. He never does plan to break up with a girl once he’s officially dating them. He’s picky with the girls he lets take on the title of his girlfriend and you can count the number of girls on one hand. You can’t say the same for his number of conquests however, and briefly you wonder what that says about him as a person. The thoughts are lost on you however, when you feel Finn take your hand and lead you to the lunch room.
And as you sit at your usual table, muttering about how you hate Brittany, you’re surprised when Santana takes your hand, and says, “I know.”
For a moment you let yourself wonder if Santana ever hates Brittany, but you can tell by the look in her eyes that she actually thinks it’s cute that her two exes have gotten together. Suddenly you feel sick to your stomach because, oh my God, it’s Brittany and how can anyone hate Brittany?! It’s like hating puppies or Christmas or chocolate.
Santana just smiles knowingly. “It’s okay to hate the person you think is stealing your man. No matter if she thinks Puerto Rican is its own language, and that Cloud 9 is a real place.”
“He’s not my man.” You point out. “He’s her man.” And you hate how sullen you sound. Because you have a man of your own, and Finn Hudson is everything you’ve ever wanted. Right?
Instead of attempting to give you any more advice, Santana turns to Kurt and starts asking him if he got the latest Cosmo yet, because she wants to know what his opinion was on their tanning expose. You feel a little gipped at first, but then you remember it’s Santana and while she may know both Puck and Brittany better than anyone else, she’s not the best at cheering anyone up.
So you sit there and mope throughout lunch because you can’t help but think that you’re the worst person in the world. It’s impossible to hate Brittany, but you suddenly feel like a walking anomaly because at this current moment in time you know two things.
One- You’re in love with Noah Puckerman.
Two- You absolutely hate Brittany because you’re pretty sure that for the first time in his life, Puck’s really in love and he’s in love with Brittany.
And as the lunch bell rings and you go back out into the hallway and see them leaning against the lockers again, a slushie in Brittany’s hand as she holds the straw for Puck to drink, you realize that you have the worst timing in the world. Why couldn’t you have realized this months ago when he was following you around like the spurned lover he was?
You may hate Brittany, but you love Puck. So, if he loves her, you’re just going to bite your lip and not say a word about it. Because you have your own boyfriend, and because you may hate Brittany, but seeing the way her laughter makes Puck’s entire face light up makes you want to not fuck this up for him.
Because you realize something: You’ve never seen that look on his face when he was holding you. And maybe he deserves a little happiness for once.
However, that doesn’t mean you’re changing your mind about Brittany though. Who cares if a fairy dies every time someone hates Brittany? Right now, that’s the only thing you’re capable of feeling and surprisingly you’re suddenly okay with that.
Your hatred for the girl only grows when you run into Puck before glee. You literally run smack into him, and instead of reminding him to watch where he’s going, you find yourself asking him, “How can you date her? I thought you could barely stand her.”
He just grins this grin that makes your stomach flip before pointing out, “I put up with you didn’t I?” And with that, he goes into the music room, and all you can do is stare after him.
You hear Brittany giggling, and you don’t even want to know what Puck’s doing to her now to elicit the sound you’re growing to hate.
Maybe you’ll start a club. The I Hate Brittany Club. Sure, you know no one will join, but it kind of makes you feel better about your life right now. So instead of focusing on how Puck is actually acting… cute, you focus on hating Brittany because surprisingly, that’s easier than thinking about Puck. Besides, you never really liked kids or puppies anyway. Maybe hating Brittany was just next in line of things you hate.
Yeah. You like that. It sounds much better than admitting out loud the real reason why you hate Brittany. Because, really? You can’t hate Brittany one bit, even though you really, really want to.
Damn it.