"shitty sangiovese"

[cordilleran2]

On nights like this
with bitter sangiovese in the glass
as I sit waiting for your replies
I realize when I fall in love
I sometimes fall too hard.

I fall like a thunder from the sky
obliterating everything
and driving those away whom I love
and if I don’t I still fear it anyway
for when i feel, it’s intense.

sometimes too intense for words
and it manifests as me worrying
about every little thing
and misinterpreting based on past lenses
kind of like how I

assumed that this sangiovese
would be delicious because,
hey, who ever encountered a bad wine
made with the blood of jove?
well, shit. it’s as acidic as my past.

all i ever do is screw up good things
because I’ve had so many bad things;
bad romances in my life
that I don’t know how to react
when someone actually cares for me

and isn’t using me for some purpose,
like a pawn in some sort of game.
and now I worry that all I’ll do is
make you cry and hurt you
just like all the others

and what i really want
to do is hold you in my arms
and heal all your wounds
in a way I can’t do with this wine.
I want to tell you every day

that it is going to always be okay.
But we are going to be drinking
an entirely different vintage together.
I’m going to pour this wine from my deck
and grab a seyval blanc from the cellar
for the promise of better nights.