#4 From the SUPER archives
As some of you may know... my first job was as a nursery attendant at my church. This lasted from when Previous!Attendant went into the hospital with appendicitis and they needed someone to cover. The job basically entailed keeping 2-5 toddlers from dying from the beginning of church until communion, which is when parents would come en masse to pick up their brood, help clean up the nursery (which was destroyed) and then we would all merrily troop into church and have The Lord's Supper. For this I was paid $10/hr.
I was usually not alone. Other friends would come in if the sermon was boring, and we'd play with the kids. Over the course of the several years I did this, we named various articles, and played many games. One day, we envisioned a Chuckie-like horror movie starring this disturbing hand puppet, Mr Giggles. This is our original screenplay.
MR GIGGLES (Title STC)
Title Possibilities:
Starring:
“Mary” as Nursery Care Provider
Christopher as Mauled Child
Matthew Nelson? as Flushed Child
Parents: Phill & Joy, crew members?, Diana & Tod Nelson? (Note: if we split parents--Joy/Critter, Phill/Matthew--we probably wouldn’t need crew.)
Random Children: Adam? Matthew H Ben&Dill? (Unliklies: Johanna & Josiah B; Sarah)
and
Mr Giggles as Himself
Stuffed Animals: Frog, Barnabas, Kitty Puppet, Monkey, Crash Frog?
Takes Place In: Nursery & Courtyard/Room 7?
ALL lines STC
1: Pre-scene First credits play (cast member names, director(s), etc.
Evening. Nursery is empty.
Mary is cleaning up. Close ups on toys strewn all over the place; playdough drying in cans: slowly room comes to order (IDEA: disaster area full-room shot fades into neat and tidy full-room shot?). Mary is looking a little frazzled, but okay. Sings/whistles to herself as she finally wipes down the table and counter.
Turns towards the door. Mr Giggles (MG) is sitting on the floor facing her/face down.
MARY: What are you doing out again?
Picks up MG and sets him on shelf.
IDEA 1: Close up on MG. Hear lightswitch click off as it goes to black (Hear door close?)
IDEA 2: Close up on MG. Cut to Mary’s back as she walks out of the nursery. Tight shot of her hand flicking light off. (Hear door close?)
IDEA 3: Close up as she places MG on shelf. Pull back until you get a complete shot of nursery. Hear light switch click as it goes to black; door closes.
FADE IN “MR GIGGLES” TITLE
CUT TO:
2. Next Day (Morning)
OUTSIDE NURSERY
Closeup of Mary’s hand (natural segue-way from hand flicking light off?) as she unlocks the door. Door swings open. Quick close up of face
CUT TO:
Inside nursery. Mary stops short.
MG is sitting directly in front of the door, looking at her.
Shrugging off her uneasiness, she passes him by and starts opening windows, top hatch of the back door, etc. When she turns again, MG has turned around and moved a foot(ish) towards her.
Mary jumps and gives a little shriek. (Emphasis little) Then she takes hold of herself.
MARY: Okay. Stuffed animals do not move. They do not move. It was the wind.
She looks at the door. It’s still open.
MARY: The wind--which I didn’t feel because I was at the other end of the room--blew Mr Giggles around so it looked like he… uhm… walked by himself towards me. But everyone knows stuffed animals don’t walk, so this is impossible and I must be going crazy… (etc.)
She gradually brings herself back to some semblance of sanity and resumes preparing the room for the day. As she is opening a package of baby wipes, she passes by a cubby where a stuffed rabbit (species STC) is sitting. As her head turns away from the rabbit, she hears a mumbling.
RABBIT: (indistinct muttering; various words may be distinguished--Danger Mr Giggles Watch Out Haunted Coming Danger etc.)
She turns towards rabbit. (Close up of rabbit, sitting innocently on shelf) Silence.
MARY: I’m going crazy.
She starts walking away.
RABBIT: (Muttering continues)
She turns again; rabbit is silent.
MARY: Okay, this is too weird!
She runs to the next room for a breather.
CUT TO:
Adjacent room/outside
Starts to gives herself a similar lecture as above, but is interrupted by a scream from the nursery. She whirls around and runs back to the room--
CUT TO:
Nursery interior
Stuffing (and sawdust? mess factor) are all over the place; floating down from the ceiling. She looks down. The Rabbit is lying at her feet, cut open at the throat. She looks at the cubby where he was previously: MG is there now (with a knife?)
Mary stares at him for a moment. Then the patter of feet from outside in the courtyard arrests her attention.
CUT TO:
Outside. Child 1 and Parent 1 arrive. Child runs to door and opens it.
CUT TO:
Inside nursery. Mary is on her hands and knees, picking up fluff.
CHILD 1: Hello, Mary!
She leaps to her feet, deposits stuffing in trash can, and says,
MARY: Hello, !
Parent 1 arrives at door with diaper bag and snack, etc.
PARENT 1: How are you today, Mary?
MARY (giving trash can sideways look): Uhm… well, you know. It’s one of those days…
PARENT 1: I understand. See you this evening, . Goodbye, Mary!
MARY: Goodbye!
Other children arrive. Footage of children playing, parents kissing them goodbye, etc. [Musical montage? Something from PastorPhill’s collection?]
3. Nursery. Mary is setting up snack. Child 2 comes up and tugs on her sleeve.
MARY: What is it, ?
Child 2: I haffa go potty!
MARY: Okay. Let’s go.
[sinister music? close up of MG]
CUT TO:
Bathroom. MARY (tastefully) situates Child 2 on toilet (or at least is in the process of doing so).
(From nursery) VOICE: Mary! Mary! Help!
MARY: Oh no! (To Child 2) --wait here, okay?
Child 2: Okay, Mary.
CUT TO:
Nursery. Is empty. Children are playing outside. No one is there to have called her. (Close up of MG?)
(From bathroom) A scream, followed by a flush.
Mary looks at cubby where MG was last. Cubby is empty.
MARY: Oh my God--
She runs for bathroom.
CUT TO:
Bathroom. Close up on MG, who is sitting on the floor facing toilet beside a wet shoe. Gradually circle around so that Mary’s horrified face is in the background (bring focus off of MG to Mary?)
She grabs MG and holds him about an inch away from her face. She stares at him a moment. Then she turns.
CUT TO:
Nursery. She shoves him under the sink.
MARY: That should keep you!
4. Preparing snack. Checks on children playing in nursery. Child 1 is playing with a large pile of stuffed animals. She turns back to smearing peanut butter on crackers.
She hears a noise (stuffed animal falling?) and turns around again. Child 1 is gone.
MARY: ?
She runs over to the pile and starts digging through it.
MARY: ?
At the pile, she produces his clothes and… MG.
She throws MG across the room. He flops to the ground, harmlessly and innocently.
MARY: (addressing room) Okay--it’s only me, right? Matthew… somehow flushed himself down the toilet. Christopher… vanished. But the stuffed animals are NOT alive, okay? They are NOT alive! I will close my eyes, and when I open them Matthew will be on the toilet going potty; Christopher will be playing with the pile of animals behind me. And everything will be normal again.
She shuts her eyes. Music/sound stops.
She opens them and turns around.
All the wheeled toys (incl. Mr Spud and his equestrian companion) have circled around her, and are moving towards her. She screams and backs up… they follow her. She looks at the dollhouse--the family is marching across the counter towards her.
Pan out so as to get full shot of all the toys advancing on her.
???????
IDEA 1: Toys kill her (tastefully: screen goes to black; hear wheel sounds).
IDEA 2: Go to newscast reporter standing outside nursery.
REPORTER: Yes, Jim--I’m here outside the Happy Hands Day Care, where all is not happy today. Apparently, a day care worker called Ms Mary Johnson [Show picture], as well as two of her charges, has gone missing. The children have told us she sent them outside to play earlier this morning while she prepared the snack. When their parents came for them this afternoon, she and [Picture], age two and a half, and [Picture], age three and a half, were absent.
Christopher’s clothing was recovered under a pile of toys; a shoe of Matthew’s was found in the restroom, leading police to believe this may be a case of abduction. People who know the twenty-year-old Johnson say she was quiet, lived alone, and seemed ‘very nice’. Back to you, Jim.
JIM (news anchor at table): If anyone has any information about the three disappearances, please notify the police. Parents of the enrolled children believe… (his voice fades out.)
[Alternate: Mary is still there, but is believed to be insane. Police arrest her for suspicion of having murdered the two children. News footage of her being handcuffed and led away?]
IDEA 3: Someone else comes up with the stupid scene.
5. Close up of MG. Is holding closed knife in his paw and facing the camera. Slowly he snaps it open and menaces the camera.
IDEA 1: Freeze frame and credits roll. (Music?)
IDEA 2: Fade to black and credits roll. (Music?)
I was usually not alone. Other friends would come in if the sermon was boring, and we'd play with the kids. Over the course of the several years I did this, we named various articles, and played many games. One day, we envisioned a Chuckie-like horror movie starring this disturbing hand puppet, Mr Giggles. This is our original screenplay.
MR GIGGLES (Title STC)
Title Possibilities:
Starring:
“Mary” as Nursery Care Provider
Christopher as Mauled Child
Matthew Nelson? as Flushed Child
Parents: Phill & Joy, crew members?, Diana & Tod Nelson? (Note: if we split parents--Joy/Critter, Phill/Matthew--we probably wouldn’t need crew.)
Random Children: Adam? Matthew H Ben&Dill? (Unliklies: Johanna & Josiah B; Sarah)
and
Mr Giggles as Himself
Stuffed Animals: Frog, Barnabas, Kitty Puppet, Monkey, Crash Frog?
Takes Place In: Nursery & Courtyard/Room 7?
ALL lines STC
1: Pre-scene First credits play (cast member names, director(s), etc.
Evening. Nursery is empty.
Mary is cleaning up. Close ups on toys strewn all over the place; playdough drying in cans: slowly room comes to order (IDEA: disaster area full-room shot fades into neat and tidy full-room shot?). Mary is looking a little frazzled, but okay. Sings/whistles to herself as she finally wipes down the table and counter.
Turns towards the door. Mr Giggles (MG) is sitting on the floor facing her/face down.
MARY: What are you doing out again?
Picks up MG and sets him on shelf.
IDEA 1: Close up on MG. Hear lightswitch click off as it goes to black (Hear door close?)
IDEA 2: Close up on MG. Cut to Mary’s back as she walks out of the nursery. Tight shot of her hand flicking light off. (Hear door close?)
IDEA 3: Close up as she places MG on shelf. Pull back until you get a complete shot of nursery. Hear light switch click as it goes to black; door closes.
FADE IN “MR GIGGLES” TITLE
CUT TO:
2. Next Day (Morning)
OUTSIDE NURSERY
Closeup of Mary’s hand (natural segue-way from hand flicking light off?) as she unlocks the door. Door swings open. Quick close up of face
CUT TO:
Inside nursery. Mary stops short.
MG is sitting directly in front of the door, looking at her.
Shrugging off her uneasiness, she passes him by and starts opening windows, top hatch of the back door, etc. When she turns again, MG has turned around and moved a foot(ish) towards her.
Mary jumps and gives a little shriek. (Emphasis little) Then she takes hold of herself.
MARY: Okay. Stuffed animals do not move. They do not move. It was the wind.
She looks at the door. It’s still open.
MARY: The wind--which I didn’t feel because I was at the other end of the room--blew Mr Giggles around so it looked like he… uhm… walked by himself towards me. But everyone knows stuffed animals don’t walk, so this is impossible and I must be going crazy… (etc.)
She gradually brings herself back to some semblance of sanity and resumes preparing the room for the day. As she is opening a package of baby wipes, she passes by a cubby where a stuffed rabbit (species STC) is sitting. As her head turns away from the rabbit, she hears a mumbling.
RABBIT: (indistinct muttering; various words may be distinguished--Danger Mr Giggles Watch Out Haunted Coming Danger etc.)
She turns towards rabbit. (Close up of rabbit, sitting innocently on shelf) Silence.
MARY: I’m going crazy.
She starts walking away.
RABBIT: (Muttering continues)
She turns again; rabbit is silent.
MARY: Okay, this is too weird!
She runs to the next room for a breather.
CUT TO:
Adjacent room/outside
Starts to gives herself a similar lecture as above, but is interrupted by a scream from the nursery. She whirls around and runs back to the room--
CUT TO:
Nursery interior
Stuffing (and sawdust? mess factor) are all over the place; floating down from the ceiling. She looks down. The Rabbit is lying at her feet, cut open at the throat. She looks at the cubby where he was previously: MG is there now (with a knife?)
Mary stares at him for a moment. Then the patter of feet from outside in the courtyard arrests her attention.
CUT TO:
Outside. Child 1 and Parent 1 arrive. Child runs to door and opens it.
CUT TO:
Inside nursery. Mary is on her hands and knees, picking up fluff.
CHILD 1: Hello, Mary!
She leaps to her feet, deposits stuffing in trash can, and says,
MARY: Hello, !
Parent 1 arrives at door with diaper bag and snack, etc.
PARENT 1: How are you today, Mary?
MARY (giving trash can sideways look): Uhm… well, you know. It’s one of those days…
PARENT 1: I understand. See you this evening, . Goodbye, Mary!
MARY: Goodbye!
Other children arrive. Footage of children playing, parents kissing them goodbye, etc. [Musical montage? Something from PastorPhill’s collection?]
3. Nursery. Mary is setting up snack. Child 2 comes up and tugs on her sleeve.
MARY: What is it, ?
Child 2: I haffa go potty!
MARY: Okay. Let’s go.
[sinister music? close up of MG]
CUT TO:
Bathroom. MARY (tastefully) situates Child 2 on toilet (or at least is in the process of doing so).
(From nursery) VOICE: Mary! Mary! Help!
MARY: Oh no! (To Child 2) --wait here, okay?
Child 2: Okay, Mary.
CUT TO:
Nursery. Is empty. Children are playing outside. No one is there to have called her. (Close up of MG?)
(From bathroom) A scream, followed by a flush.
Mary looks at cubby where MG was last. Cubby is empty.
MARY: Oh my God--
She runs for bathroom.
CUT TO:
Bathroom. Close up on MG, who is sitting on the floor facing toilet beside a wet shoe. Gradually circle around so that Mary’s horrified face is in the background (bring focus off of MG to Mary?)
She grabs MG and holds him about an inch away from her face. She stares at him a moment. Then she turns.
CUT TO:
Nursery. She shoves him under the sink.
MARY: That should keep you!
4. Preparing snack. Checks on children playing in nursery. Child 1 is playing with a large pile of stuffed animals. She turns back to smearing peanut butter on crackers.
She hears a noise (stuffed animal falling?) and turns around again. Child 1 is gone.
MARY: ?
She runs over to the pile and starts digging through it.
MARY: ?
At the pile, she produces his clothes and… MG.
She throws MG across the room. He flops to the ground, harmlessly and innocently.
MARY: (addressing room) Okay--it’s only me, right? Matthew… somehow flushed himself down the toilet. Christopher… vanished. But the stuffed animals are NOT alive, okay? They are NOT alive! I will close my eyes, and when I open them Matthew will be on the toilet going potty; Christopher will be playing with the pile of animals behind me. And everything will be normal again.
She shuts her eyes. Music/sound stops.
She opens them and turns around.
All the wheeled toys (incl. Mr Spud and his equestrian companion) have circled around her, and are moving towards her. She screams and backs up… they follow her. She looks at the dollhouse--the family is marching across the counter towards her.
Pan out so as to get full shot of all the toys advancing on her.
???????
IDEA 1: Toys kill her (tastefully: screen goes to black; hear wheel sounds).
IDEA 2: Go to newscast reporter standing outside nursery.
REPORTER: Yes, Jim--I’m here outside the Happy Hands Day Care, where all is not happy today. Apparently, a day care worker called Ms Mary Johnson [Show picture], as well as two of her charges, has gone missing. The children have told us she sent them outside to play earlier this morning while she prepared the snack. When their parents came for them this afternoon, she and [Picture], age two and a half, and [Picture], age three and a half, were absent.
Christopher’s clothing was recovered under a pile of toys; a shoe of Matthew’s was found in the restroom, leading police to believe this may be a case of abduction. People who know the twenty-year-old Johnson say she was quiet, lived alone, and seemed ‘very nice’. Back to you, Jim.
JIM (news anchor at table): If anyone has any information about the three disappearances, please notify the police. Parents of the enrolled children believe… (his voice fades out.)
[Alternate: Mary is still there, but is believed to be insane. Police arrest her for suspicion of having murdered the two children. News footage of her being handcuffed and led away?]
IDEA 3: Someone else comes up with the stupid scene.
5. Close up of MG. Is holding closed knife in his paw and facing the camera. Slowly he snaps it open and menaces the camera.
IDEA 1: Freeze frame and credits roll. (Music?)
IDEA 2: Fade to black and credits roll. (Music?)