LJ Idol Season 9, Week 13: Open Topic

[copyright1983]

Middle GroundI have friends on Facebook who span the political spectrum. Some are very conservative, bashing Obama at every turn and posting patriotic pictures and Bible verses every chance they get. Others are highly liberal, blasting the Republican Congress for being ineffective and sharing economic studies and pictures from Pride parades all

Comments

[kickthehobbit]

Echoing what else has been said here-I'd love to think that there is a middle ground and that we can all talk about things like adults without resorting to yelling and screaming or turning the conversation into an echo chamber.

At the same time, there are a few issues that, quite simply put, if you're wrong on, you're wrong. Period.

[copyright1983]

The trouble is, both sides feel that way, and they can't both be right. How, then, do we actually create a constructive dialogue about those issues? I don't have an answer, but I'm open to suggestions. :)

Thanks for reading!

[kickthehobbit]

That's such a cop-out, though-"both sides feel they're right".

Let me put it a little more bluntly:

I refuse to engage with anyone who sees me as a lesser human being (if human at all) because of the color of my skin or the fact that I am a woman.

We don't create a "constructive dialog" with those that are actively trying to harm us. I'm not going to go to the trolls over in the comment section on every piece about feminism, ever, and go, "whoa, hey guys, maybe we shouldn't call women bitches and sluts, amirite?"

We ignore them. We educate those that we can. We do our best to end ignorance. We don't engage them. Engaging them makes them believe that their opinions-their incredibly toxic and actively harmful opinions-have some validity to them. And they don't. Period, full stop.

[copyright1983]

I agree that there are people out there with dangerous, wrong-headed ideas about a lot of things. I disagree, however, that there's no way to reach those people.

I'm not sure what the solution is, though. Ignoring them and leaving them to their own echo chamber just entrenches them further into their positions. I agree that giving those positions validity is also counterproductive, but repeatedly telling people they're wrong doesn't seem to work either.

I don't know. It just feels like there has to be a way through.

[kickthehobbit]

Again: educate where you can-but don't engage with them on the same level, and don't allow them the illusion that their opinions are somehow well-formed or valid. Don't hear someone out-once they start with the racist jokes/remarks, don't give them an inch. Education is the only way to combat ignorance, and if you can't do it yourself (because, speaking as someone who runs into this a lot, you get so very tired of telling people why it's not OK that they're a bunch of racist jerks), let someone else step in for you-this is a place where allies are good. But don't allow it to propagate, and don't sit on your hands and go, "Well, there are two sides to every story..."-because, sure, ideally there are, but some things really are black and white, and to treat them as anything else-to pretend that there is some merit in engaging with the person that just called you a racist slur-pretending that there's some area in the middle where you can meet and they're not completely wrong-is ludicrous

[copyright1983]

I recognize that I've never faced the level of vitriol you describe here, and I'm angry on your behalf. I'm still working through my feelings on how to bridge the divide--but I'm going to remain stubborn in my belief that it can, in fact, be bridged.

[n3m3sis43]

I refuse to engage with anyone who sees me as a lesser human being (if human at all) because of the color of my skin or the fact that I am a woman.

I agree with you here. But I also don't see that as "differing opinions." To me, it's more like hatred being disguised as differing opinions. Which, yeah, can't really come to an agreement there.