Learning Curve- chapter twenty-eight
Chapter twenty-eight
"Absolute idiot."
Matt was savagely wrapping a bandage around Russell's cut hand, spitting a new insult with every tightening twist. "Fucking diva. You stupid, stupid man.You've destroyed your phone and computer, you've ransacked half the house, and ripped your hand open, and what has any of that achieved? Well?" He yanked on the bandage, knotting it fiercely. "That phone had important numbers on it, that laptop had important documents on it, you lost a fair bit of blood all over the floor and in doing so probably done some damage to that baby in there. You've exhausted yourself and have still got a busy day ahead of you... Russell, DON'T cry."
"What do you expect me to do?!" Russell choked, "I've just been accused of being a fucking paedophile rapist cunt, I've lost my job, the job I LOVED, Matthew!"
"I loved it too Russell!" Matt hissed, "I'm going to miss it just as much as you, if not more, but I'm the one in more trouble, cause I haven't got half as much money as you and where else can I get a job? I understand that your emotions are currently awful, Russell, and I'm so sorry, I think you've been so brave, I was expecting you to react worse than we did... but why did you do that?" His voice had dropped to a whisper as he gestured at the broken bottle, "Russell. This is just now isn't it? Cause your hormones are a mess and everything. This is the first time you've thought about it in years. Right?"
Russell stared blankly past Matt, breathing out through pursed lips, contemplating how to reply. Matt shook him by his shoulders. "Russell?"
"Matt, what I think about and don't doesn't affect you. What matters is whether I go through with... things or not. Alright? Get off," He shrugged him away. Matt leapt up, furious, throwing his arms above his head.
"Alright, I'll go away, I could've not come around here, left you here on your own all day, left you alone forever, watch you struggle to get yourself out of this trap that you've ultimately built yourself!" Matt roared, "All I ever do is carry you, Russell! And what thanks do I get?!"
"Jesus, come on Matt, I didn't mean-" Russell started, making to stand up, but Matt held up his hand.
"No, don't bother, forget it," And walked swiftly out of the room. Russell rested his head on his knees, tears dripping from his face, and heard Sharon out in the hall, trying to protest against Matt leaving. He shouted at her too, told Gee not to dare go and "pander to that idiot's every little whim", and as soon as Russell heard the front door slam, Sharon rushed into the room. She wrapped her arms around Russell without saying anything, resting against his shoulder. He put both his hands on her back, not looking at her, until she shifted to put a hand on his protruding stomach. He met her eyes, and his own stopped watering.
"Listen to me, Russell," She said earnestly, "We're going to sort this mess out. We're going to get you dressed, tidy up here, and then we're going to smooth everything out. We're going to sue the Daily Mail's arse right back into the 1950s, once you've issued a statement about what's really happening,"
"Wh-what's really happening?!" Russell squeaked, "You're joking!"
"I'm afraid we haven't got a choice, Russell. Things have got too out of hand, we need to tell the truth."
"Sharon... I... I'll be... I'll be killed, Sharon. I won't be safe."
"We thought it'd be best if you went over to LA and get a new house there with Noel, where no one knows where you are. At least for a while. You can come back just before the due date if you don't want the complications of the baby being born in America."
"Matt, what about Matt?" Russell panicked, "What about my Mum, what about all my friends, what about you? Sharon?"
"Just you and Noel, Russell. That's the way it'll be when you're married. You can last a couple of months without us."
"I can't, Sharon!" Russell clutched at the front of her jacket, "The radio show was what was keeping me sane. If I stop working- I can't stop working-"
"Russell. You've got a book to write. Now come on," She smiled at him, "We've got some stuff to do. Let's get some clothes on you." She took his hand and pulled him to his feet. He put a hand under her elbow to steady himself, and then looked down at her.
"God... Sometimes, Sharon, I think we should've been married. Just for the convenience of it, and the company."
She laughed.
"No sex then?"
"Certainly not."
"Count me out then, love."
"Maybe if you're a good girl."
"Russell?"
"Hmm?"
"Hush now."
* * *
"Hhinkghf?" Noel said into the phone, his hair covering his face. It was twenty past two in the morning, and he had been fast asleep until he had received a phone call.
"Hello Noel Fielding." A voice said, sounding angry with just a hint of sarcasm.
"Well, if it isn't Matt Morgan," Noel replied, sitting up and stretching, before glancing at the clock, "What prompts you to call at this time when I'm sure a man like you knows a thing or two about time difference?"
"I just thought you might like to know that the whole nation think your fiancee has impregnated a fifteen year old girl, possibly by raping her, he's lost his job, and he's just trashed his phone, laptop and most of your house, and attempted to slit his wrists."
Noel was wide awake now.
"What?! Fucking hell, Morgan, what?! What the fuck's going on?"
"He'll be alright. He always is, isn't he the lucky one. Don't think you need to dash over here. A stylist and a poet have decided that they're in the position to know that the best thing to do is to stick him on a plane to come and be with you! Which I'm sure you'll agree must be the answer."
"Matthew Morgan, tell me what in the name of Manuel's arse is going on, or I'll-"
"By the way, my girlfriend says your name when I have sex with her and when she dreams. Get back to me on how to make her stop doing that, cause it's rather annoying, okay?"
The line went dead.
* * *
Russell fidgeted in the armchair, clenching and unclenching his hands on the arm rests, crossing his legs but then hastily uncrossing them when he remembered that it was bad for the baby. He looked across at his friend.
"I want you to be honest with me, Russell,"
Russell sighed.
"I should've known this would happen. It was bound to get out. But it's all my fault- like Matt said, if I didn't complain so much-"
"Hey, hey, I'm not Matt am I, Matt's buggered off. They'd've had to have found out sometime Russell. Once you've told the truth this gets it over and done with doesn't it."
"I'm scared, can't you understand that?"
"Of course your scared, it's pretty fucking obvious that your scared. But if we were never scared we'd never be brave, would we?"
Russell rubbed his forehead.
"I need to speak to Matthew. I can't go away without reconciling things with him."
"He called me, you know, told me he was going to call Noel Fielding, then hung up."
Russell sat up in his chair.
"You're joking?! Oh, shit! Shit..."
"Calm down, Russ,"
"I can't even begin to think the awful things he might say-"
"Well don't think then! Whatever Matt says, that kid will hold what you say over it. You're engaged to him for Gods sake. Hey. Come on. You can make it, Russell, for that little un if not for yourself."
"It ain't a little one, it's a fucking big one," Russell laughed, supporting his own back as he got to his feet.
"You shouldn't really be wearing them boots still, should you?"
"My boots ain't doing me any harm," Russell objected defiantly.
"Doin' me harm though, they're so feminine they hurt my eyes!"
"I thought you liked feminine things, your girlfriend for example."
"Ah, no, that's where you're wrong. Not got a girlfriend."
Russell stared, gobsmacked, horrified.
"You- what?! You're not with-"
"Gotcha," The other man grinned at having startled Russell, "Not got a girlfriend. Got a fiancee though."
Russell beamed, gasping,
"Cor, everyone's getting married! Well... congratulations mate!" He held out his arms, beckoning with both hands when his friend held back, "Come on, Noel Gallagher, you big softie, give us a hug!" He obliged, and Russell held him as close as was possible with the burgeoning bump. Noel squirmed, uncomfortable not with the proximity but the awkward position.
"That thing's nothing short of intrusive now," He complained, but not trying to break out of the hug.
"Noel Gallagher, thank you so much so not kicking my head in, which quite frankly the behaviour I used to expect from you. I love you, you know," Russell said.
"Yeah, I love you too Russell."
* * *
Matt shut the front door behind and leaned against it, shutting his eyes and breathing out heavily, tossing his keys to the floor. Dee leapt into the hallway, a towel wrapped around her head.
"Look, look!" She shrieked, pointing to her head, "Black," She gestured at the long uncovered sections of her hair, "Blue!" She swept the towel away, revealing her electric blue sweeping fringe with a flourish. Matt stared blankly at her. She carried on smiling until Matt's expression sunk in and her face fell. "What's wrong?" She asked quietly.
"Dee. We really need to talk."
* * *