Ficlet (White Collar): Kind of Cute, in a Weird Way
Title: Kind of Cute, in a Weird Way
Author: cookielaura
Characters/Pairings: Diana, Mozzie, mention of Theo, gen
Wordcount: 452
Rating: G
Contains: Amphibians!
Summary: Post-series. Mozzie has bought a pet for Theo. It's not quite what Diana had in mind.
Notes: Written for leesa_perrie's fandom stocking
Diana wasn’t sure quite what to say. Truth be told, she wasn’t even sure what exactly she was looking at.
“It’s, err, very unusual,” she said, tilting her head to examine it from another angle and trying not to wrinkle her nose too much. Mozzie had a habit of procuring interesting gifts for Theo, and she had learnt that questioning their suitability usually led her into a two-hour conversation that was impossible to cut short.
“It is, isn’t it?” Mozzie said proudly. He reached down and stroked the creature in the plastic container. “When you mentioned that Theo had been wanting a pet, I knew this little guy would be the perfect match for him.”
Diana watched as the creature twitched its brightly coloured face and nudged its head against Mozzie’s hand. It appeared to be a frog, but it didn’t look like any frog she’d seen before - its legs were a vibrant orange with black spots, and its body was a dark blue with green stripes.
“What is it, exactly?” she asked.
“It’s a Costa Rican poison dart frog,” Mozzie declared, looking very pleased with himself.
“A poisonous frog?” Diana echoed, her head beginning to hurt. The fact that she wasn’t even particularly surprised by Mozzie’s answer indicated that they had been spending far too much time together. “And you thought this would be an appropriate pet for a seven year old?”
Mozzie gave her a longsuffering look and picked up the frog gently, causing Diana to take a step back in self-protection.
“Poison dart frogs are the perfect pet. They’re inexpensive to look after, they’re easy to keep in an apartment because they’re happy in a small terrarium, and -
“But -” Diana started, intending to point out that no matter how simple or cheap the frog would be to keep, it wasn’t worth dying for.
“And,” Mozzie continued, holding up a finger, “they’re completely non-toxic.”
Diana narrowed her eyes. “You just said it was poisonous.”
“Poison dart frogs aren’t toxic when raised in captivity. They’re perfectly safe.” Mozzie folded his arms in a satisfied manner.
Diana sighed and turned her attention back to the strange looking frog, who was blinking up at her. It was kind of cute, in a weird way. And Theo had been pestering her for a pet for weeks.
“You’ll teach him how to look after it?” she asked, resignedly.
Mozzie grinned. “I’ve already bought the terrarium,” he said.
Diana deliberated a moment more, then much to Mozzie’s delight, rolled her eyes and shrugged in acceptance. Theo’s bedroom was already filled with a vast selection of random and bizarre items from his much-loved Uncle Mozzie. She supposed a poison dart frog would probably fit right in.
Author: cookielaura
Characters/Pairings: Diana, Mozzie, mention of Theo, gen
Wordcount: 452
Rating: G
Contains: Amphibians!
Summary: Post-series. Mozzie has bought a pet for Theo. It's not quite what Diana had in mind.
Notes: Written for leesa_perrie's fandom stocking
Diana wasn’t sure quite what to say. Truth be told, she wasn’t even sure what exactly she was looking at.
“It’s, err, very unusual,” she said, tilting her head to examine it from another angle and trying not to wrinkle her nose too much. Mozzie had a habit of procuring interesting gifts for Theo, and she had learnt that questioning their suitability usually led her into a two-hour conversation that was impossible to cut short.
“It is, isn’t it?” Mozzie said proudly. He reached down and stroked the creature in the plastic container. “When you mentioned that Theo had been wanting a pet, I knew this little guy would be the perfect match for him.”
Diana watched as the creature twitched its brightly coloured face and nudged its head against Mozzie’s hand. It appeared to be a frog, but it didn’t look like any frog she’d seen before - its legs were a vibrant orange with black spots, and its body was a dark blue with green stripes.
“What is it, exactly?” she asked.
“It’s a Costa Rican poison dart frog,” Mozzie declared, looking very pleased with himself.
“A poisonous frog?” Diana echoed, her head beginning to hurt. The fact that she wasn’t even particularly surprised by Mozzie’s answer indicated that they had been spending far too much time together. “And you thought this would be an appropriate pet for a seven year old?”
Mozzie gave her a longsuffering look and picked up the frog gently, causing Diana to take a step back in self-protection.
“Poison dart frogs are the perfect pet. They’re inexpensive to look after, they’re easy to keep in an apartment because they’re happy in a small terrarium, and -
“But -” Diana started, intending to point out that no matter how simple or cheap the frog would be to keep, it wasn’t worth dying for.
“And,” Mozzie continued, holding up a finger, “they’re completely non-toxic.”
Diana narrowed her eyes. “You just said it was poisonous.”
“Poison dart frogs aren’t toxic when raised in captivity. They’re perfectly safe.” Mozzie folded his arms in a satisfied manner.
Diana sighed and turned her attention back to the strange looking frog, who was blinking up at her. It was kind of cute, in a weird way. And Theo had been pestering her for a pet for weeks.
“You’ll teach him how to look after it?” she asked, resignedly.
Mozzie grinned. “I’ve already bought the terrarium,” he said.
Diana deliberated a moment more, then much to Mozzie’s delight, rolled her eyes and shrugged in acceptance. Theo’s bedroom was already filled with a vast selection of random and bizarre items from his much-loved Uncle Mozzie. She supposed a poison dart frog would probably fit right in.