I can pretty much figure out what Harper is thinking, but I'm still pretty clueless about Theresa. On one hand, she's a wife (warm and tender), but on the other hand, she's a soldier... I have a problem imagining her doing Sharpe *with* Harper, without more info on how she's approaching the situation.
Re: Fantastic!caras_galadhonJanuary 28 2003, 02:40:05 UTC
I have a problem imagining her doing Sharpe *with* Harper, without more info on how she's approaching the situation. Yeah, actually, me too. Or at least I'm not really sure what she's up to. I meant to end with her leaving Sharpe and Harper alone together in the room, some of the same acceptance of their relationship present in her actions as she exhibited before (I'd venture to say that this particular Teresa is more accepting of Sharpe/Harper than they are themselves), but she stuck around. I'm not really sure where she's going with all of this, frankly, as she's not being very forthcoming. *sigh* Worries me.
But still. Mmm. Wiggly maggots and foreplay. *LOL* Glad you liked it. ^_^ May need to take up your offer on beta'ing Sharpefic in the near future, if that offer is still open. Not sure if I want/have the time to bash this one into better shape before archiving it, but...
This is the perfect sequel to Blooded. All the lovely, true-to-life details, and Sharpe going through it with his eyes closed... and yes, he doesn't want tenderness, and yet Harper is so gentle, here--I'm in awe. I want more of it! I want a sequel to the sequel! ;)
This is the perfect sequel to Blooded. *squeak* Thanks! ...That's a good thing, right?
yes, he doesn't want tenderness, and yet Harper is so gentle, here Phew. Glad that came out all right. Thank you!
I want a sequel to the sequel! *G* Ack! But I don't know what Teresa is up to, and I don't know where it's all going, and, and... :::narrowing eyes::: Are you trying to make this into a series? Three stories would constitute a series, wouldn't they? 'Cause that'll screw up my claim that I only write short one-shots. ^_^
:::narrowing eyes::: Are you trying to make this into a series? Three stories would constitute a series, wouldn't they? *smiles innocently* Yep, that was my plan. Is it working? ;)
This is so rich with detail, so much so that I can't even begin to include quotes for all the parts that made me smile. However, they included the paragraph when Sharpe undresses, the fact that chair has one leg shorter than the other, the details about Teresa's hands.
Oh, hell, and things like this A familiar voice issued from the doorway, the timbre adding to the thrumming sensation already rolling up and down Sharpe's back. And this Nameless, unspoken, it existed only in the harshness of the march, boots thudding through trampled grass, over slippery rock. It existed in the nights without stars, a soldier's hand clapping a brother on his shoulder, fumbling at the entrance to his breeches. There was no tenderness in it.
And the last three paragraphs...WOW! I loved the details, the fact that Sharpe finally opens his eyes, the echo of "no tenderness." Yes, I like echo too.
Love it!!! Oh, thank goodness. The whole thing still sounds terribly rough to my ears, but it's gratifying to know it still works reasonably well. I trust your judgement, and I trust you'd tell me if it didn't work. ^_^
I loved the details, the fact that Sharpe finally opens his eyes, the echo of "no tenderness." Thank you! I'm so glad you enjoyed it, and I'm really glad the echo was strong enough to resonate at the end there.
You have a real knack for working in the vivid details -- the unpleasant ones in particular are so real they make me squirm. (Maggots!) Very strong and compelling.
Okay, i don't really know Sharpe (more's the pity), so I can't offer much in the way of constructive character criticism, but I have to tell you (again) that your eye for detail is Tolkien-like. I agree with everyone else about the repetition of "tenderness" in all its shades of meaning: great, evocative word. For that matter, you seem to really have your word choice down--never too many adjectives where one will do, never a muddled image where you can use a simple, more effective one. Hats off (ooh! It's cold! hats back on!!).
I might have to go off and become obsessed with Sharpe. I blame you!
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I can pretty much figure out what Harper is thinking, but I'm still pretty clueless about Theresa. On one hand, she's a wife
(warm and tender), but on the other hand, she's a soldier... I have a problem imagining her doing Sharpe *with* Harper, without more info on how she's approaching the situation.
But still. Mmm. Wiggly maggots and foreplay.
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Yeah, actually, me too. Or at least I'm not really sure what she's up to. I meant to end with her leaving Sharpe and Harper alone together in the room, some of the same acceptance of their relationship present in her actions as she exhibited before (I'd venture to say that this particular Teresa is more accepting of Sharpe/Harper than they are themselves), but she stuck around. I'm not really sure where she's going with all of this, frankly, as she's not being very forthcoming. *sigh* Worries me.
But still. Mmm. Wiggly maggots and foreplay.
*LOL* Glad you liked it. ^_^ May need to take up your offer on beta'ing Sharpefic in the near future, if that offer is still open. Not sure if I want/have the time to bash this one into better shape before archiving it, but...
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The offer is still so open that the Concorde could fly through it.
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*squeak* Thanks! ...That's a good thing, right?
yes, he doesn't want tenderness, and yet Harper is so gentle, here
Phew. Glad that came out all right. Thank you!
I want a sequel to the sequel!
*G* Ack! But I don't know what Teresa is up to, and I don't know where it's all going, and, and... :::narrowing eyes::: Are you trying to make this into a series? Three stories would constitute a series, wouldn't they? 'Cause that'll screw up my claim that I only write short one-shots. ^_^
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*smiles innocently* Yep, that was my plan. Is it working? ;)
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*LOL* Possibly... probably. I guess we'll see what happens, eh? Thanks for the encouragement! ^_~
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This is so rich with detail, so much so that I can't even begin to include quotes for all the parts that made me smile. However, they included the paragraph when Sharpe undresses, the fact that chair has one leg shorter than the other, the details about Teresa's hands.
Oh, hell, and things like this A familiar voice issued from the doorway, the timbre adding to the thrumming sensation already rolling up and down Sharpe's back. And this Nameless, unspoken, it existed only in the harshness of the march, boots thudding through trampled grass, over slippery rock. It existed in the nights without stars, a soldier's hand clapping a brother on his shoulder, fumbling at the entrance to his breeches. There was no tenderness in it.
And the last three paragraphs...WOW! I loved the details, the fact that Sharpe finally opens his eyes, the echo of "no tenderness." Yes, I like echo too.
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Oh, thank goodness. The whole thing still sounds terribly rough to my ears, but it's gratifying to know it still works reasonably well. I trust your judgement, and I trust you'd tell me if it didn't work. ^_^
I loved the details, the fact that Sharpe finally opens his eyes, the echo of "no tenderness."
Thank you! I'm so glad you enjoyed it, and I'm really glad the echo was strong enough to resonate at the end there.
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I might have to go off and become obsessed with Sharpe. I blame you!
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I might have to go off and become obsessed with Sharpe. I blame you!
*supressing evil laughter* Hey, I'm happy to take the blame!
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