what-the-fuck-ever

[continuous]

in whatever random state of frequent drunkeness i find myself to be in this evening-
it occurred to me that a majority of my friends resent me-
let me see here...

one of my best friend's insecurities lead him to wonder if i was sleeping with his girlfriend
okay... so, granted i was the recipient of such a shitty deed in the past-
the notion of doing such to a friend of mine hardly interests me-
not my style

the few friends i have keep bringing to my attention- with a sense of something or other- that their girlfriends think i'm hot
flattering, sure- uncomfortable, yes-
i too, have a girlfriend that thinks the same thing- it's my personality that either never gets mentioned or is constantly being fought about.

i sometimes have money that allows me to present myself with a decent sense of style
i'm getting sick of borrowing my clothes to friends and never getting them back-
i'm also sick of them bitching about me biting their style- when they're wearing my clothes

i fucking hate it. everything.

so, what,
all in all, i'm a relatively attractive guy who can piece together an outfit and whatnot-
just... i used to be fat and shit, so whatever black book people think i'm holding... it doesn't exist
even when i was single, i still didn't talk to girls-
because there's nothing a guy can say to girl that isn't gonna make her think the only reason why he's talking to her is because he want to fuck her-

plain and simple-

i'm just fucking sick of people thinking i'm something i'm not-
which is a girlfriend stealing man whore asshole
it's bullshit

jonas said it best on sunday nite