(no subject)
out of all the accomplishments announced during our Senior Recognition '03,
i was only envious of one: Thomas Cleveland has a fucking meteor named after him.
but i ain't mad atcha, tom.
it was the only one that is actually memorable, 2 years later.
and honestly, i'd hit that.
but then i'm that kind of girl.
so you can imagine when a commercial on the radio suggested the perfect Valentine's gift for your sweetheart. i'd swoon and fellate in alternate intervals for that. no lie.
how dreamy.
driving home, i was pulled over in Brusly.
59 mph in a 45mph zone that turned into a 55mph zone only 2 centimeters after he clocked me.
the officer kept insisting that he "knew me from somewhere?"
"did i give you a ticket before?"
"no. this is my first one. Congratulations."
he giggled at that and continued to write the ticket as we shot the breeze.
i'm getting desperate for another source of income.
still within legals means of my standards, of course.
the night was further accentuated by an ex-boyfriend, who can't keep it in his pants.
for compensation, we had a night on the town, i.e. Denny's.
i finally got pancakes, which ive been literally dreaming about since November.
though i was disgustingly laidNsated by the end of it, the night's potential evaporated as soon as we parked back at home.
red and blue lights flashing directly in front of my house.
i calmly remembered leaving a candle burning.
fred had to pry me out of his car
as i realized i had not only burned down my cute european apt, but killed my cat, and left my landlord. her Turkish bornNraised dobermans, & possibly, the young professors next door homeless and devastated.
how embarrassing!
we walked closer and realized that nothing was wrong.
a fire engine just decided to park on my lawn at 12:34am for the sole purpose of fucking me up.
"just joking, leelee!"
obviously, that fuck @ Cardiff University miscalculated his 'worst day of 2005' formula.
i was only envious of one: Thomas Cleveland has a fucking meteor named after him.
but i ain't mad atcha, tom.
it was the only one that is actually memorable, 2 years later.
and honestly, i'd hit that.
but then i'm that kind of girl.
so you can imagine when a commercial on the radio suggested the perfect Valentine's gift for your sweetheart. i'd swoon and fellate in alternate intervals for that. no lie.
how dreamy.
driving home, i was pulled over in Brusly.
59 mph in a 45mph zone that turned into a 55mph zone only 2 centimeters after he clocked me.
the officer kept insisting that he "knew me from somewhere?"
"did i give you a ticket before?"
"no. this is my first one. Congratulations."
he giggled at that and continued to write the ticket as we shot the breeze.
i'm getting desperate for another source of income.
still within legals means of my standards, of course.
the night was further accentuated by an ex-boyfriend, who can't keep it in his pants.
for compensation, we had a night on the town, i.e. Denny's.
i finally got pancakes, which ive been literally dreaming about since November.
though i was disgustingly laidNsated by the end of it, the night's potential evaporated as soon as we parked back at home.
red and blue lights flashing directly in front of my house.
i calmly remembered leaving a candle burning.
fred had to pry me out of his car
as i realized i had not only burned down my cute european apt, but killed my cat, and left my landlord. her Turkish bornNraised dobermans, & possibly, the young professors next door homeless and devastated.
how embarrassing!
we walked closer and realized that nothing was wrong.
a fire engine just decided to park on my lawn at 12:34am for the sole purpose of fucking me up.
"just joking, leelee!"
obviously, that fuck @ Cardiff University miscalculated his 'worst day of 2005' formula.