i wrote a childrens story again.

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There once was a dog named Baby. This is not an unusual name for a pet. Many children unaware of their animals dignity urge parents to name their pets such names as Baby, Angel, Fluffy, Whiskers, and Princess. So Baby was another beloved pet donned with a less than beloved name. The only problem was that most animals named Princess or Fluffy are small cats who lay around and do nothing all day or tiny dogs who bark constantly while chewing on their bones or tearing up their owners shoes, but Baby was not like either of these types of pets. Baby was a rather large doberman pincher. She was very fearsome just by her demeanor to those who did not know her, but to those who did, she was just a joke of what she appeared to be. Baby the big fearsome doberman pincher had IBS. If you do not know what IBS is, just know that because Baby suffered from this condition, she would poop at all the wrong times in all the wrong places. She would poop while sleeping and wake up smelly, she would poop while the family watched a wholesome movie on the tv and the children would laugh and point, she would even poop while eating. It was quite an embarrassing problem for Baby to have to deal with, after all she was supposed to be the scary guard dog that keeps away all the bad people. Instead she was just the smelly dog that couldnt stop pooping everywhere. She pooped in the kitchen, she pooped by the swingset, she even pooped in the pool. Baby was a nervous wreck. One day when she was done eating her food she turned around and one of the children yelled out, "BABY, come're, come on you big poopie." She was so embarrassed that she just pooped right then and there. Baby made a big mess all in her food bowl and the other child yelled out, "BABY DONE POOPIE" Together the children chanted "BABY DONE POOPIE, BABY DONE POOPIE, BABY DONE POOPIE!" Baby was so embarrassed that she ran away. She didn't want to eat out of the bowl she just pooped in ever again. She knew she was a good dog, she just had a problem with her poop. She kept on running and pooping for a week straight. Baby pooped on railroad tracks, Baby pooped on the porch of a grocery market. She pooped in a park, she pooped on volleyball court, she even pooped on a fire hydrant. Baby pooped and ran everywhere, until she got tired and fell asleep right by the fire station. The next morning when the sun just barely woke Baby up, a Fireman saw her and said "Woah Killer!" Baby wasn't used to people being scared of her and calling her appropriate names like Killer. She just stood up looked at the man and with a whimper, let out a tiny pellet of poop. "Awe, you might look like a killer, but you are a big sweetie, aint ya." Baby walked closer and barked and the fireman looked at her and said, "Alright Killer, you can be a sweetheart on your terms." Baby liked that, she ran over and licked the firemans hand and he petted her and said, "You need a home Killer, here you go." The fireman kept calling Baby, Killer and Baby liked this. They played catch out back all day and the man kept saying, "Get it Killer, get it!" All his fireman friends thought Baby was the coolest dog ever and they all called her Killer. Baby had the best day of her life and when it started to get dark, the nice fireman took her home and said, "Hey Killer, you want to be my dog." Baby was nervous cause she knew no one would want her after they realized she poops everywhere, so she just looked away. The fireman petted her and said, "You are a good dog Killer, I think you might be the best dog ever." Baby didnt know how someone could think this about her after only one day. She thought about the day and realized one thing, she didnt poop all day long except when the fireman took her on her walk and said, "poop out here Killer." Baby just realized that she just pooped cause all the people who said they loved her just called her Baby instead of treating her like the Killer she really was inside. She liked the fireman cause he knew Baby was no baby, baby was a Killer and only sweet cause she wanted to be. From then on out, no one yelled out to her, "BABY DONE POOPIE!" cause no one knew her as Baby, and also cause Killer was too cool of a dog to have IBS.

someone gave me a great idea about a childrens story so here it is. i also found a good mp3 converter, so i am uploading the conversations i recored with a telemarketer who is from india. it was the most random thing, but two mornings in a row a telemarketer who was indian woke me up so i recored everything and it was really funny. then his friend called me back and says his name is "Nick George, Im from the FBI" and well its another seven minutes of dealing with a Indian guy, but this time he says he is from the FBI and he is going to arrest me. Then we all laugh about it later.

to listen to the funny conversation i had with the hindu telemarketer go to this link, http://www.myspace.com/biblicalultraviolence
its where im dumping all my stuff until i do a music project named biblical ultra violence