(no subject)
Another year I claim of total indifference
The above line pretty much sums up the way I feel right now, my 16th year is over and I feel that my whole life i have succeeded in absolutely nothing but being more and more uncomfortable in my skin. I treat him horribly, and I punish myself fr it repeatidly. I dony know why I do, well I might. But it hutrts to talk about it, it will hurt him and I. Im just praying that I dont do it to him cause I miss Chris, cause that would be awful, cause I love Josh, I do. And I dont knwo if I can really picture myself without him, I dont know...Im trying to change, become soemone new, its starting to work, but Josh and I still yell alot. I dont know what I should do to make this stop...
The above line pretty much sums up the way I feel right now, my 16th year is over and I feel that my whole life i have succeeded in absolutely nothing but being more and more uncomfortable in my skin. I treat him horribly, and I punish myself fr it repeatidly. I dony know why I do, well I might. But it hutrts to talk about it, it will hurt him and I. Im just praying that I dont do it to him cause I miss Chris, cause that would be awful, cause I love Josh, I do. And I dont knwo if I can really picture myself without him, I dont know...Im trying to change, become soemone new, its starting to work, but Josh and I still yell alot. I dont know what I should do to make this stop...