Still don't know what I was waiting for...

Apr 13, 2008 01:26

Tip tip tip, goes the saskatoon on the treble bam of the drum, and the singer begins to sing, while I think about the words that were said earlier tonight. Blood ink spurts from the poets that have long since forgotten how to live their lives, and must continually ask questionings, "Hello! Hello! How was it I lived one before, back when once i was you that one time time time one one oen"

And it's not as though there's not a life without my old pet dog, but the family departure of the pet is a time of change and then things will never be the same again. An era has ended when my pink casted friend has become euthanized. He's been "released" as the book tried to explain to me. Ch-ch-ch-changes.

And it's again and again on the merry, round around. I move the lamp from it's perch to a lower stance, and immediately I am discontented, but I can always change it back to the way things were. At least on the desk scale. The epic chords of high school strike again and again in my head. Like the famous last words of that novel, "I think I can almost cry" But end scene. "Be a man, see it through to the end" a famous director was once told, and then he did.

In the flatteringly dark of the well light room, I- opposites, opposites are FALACY! - and he said some words, which I wanted to mimc, it was so formulaic, and I wondered why I couldn't just mimic it all. STRUCTURE, SIR, STRUCTURE I SAY, DON'T FORGET YOUR CANE, WE LIKE YOU AS A RETURN CUSTOMER!!! mer, mer, mer, mer. Oh how cute it was all in retrospect, and in retrospect I think about hot tubs and a friend who wanders. "Please! Please!" I wave my hands in front of her face, but she can't see them, or she thinks she sees them, "What's that? I think- I think I see them- I see something" But then moments later she lapses, crying out her loss in the desert. It's only a lawn, but she calls it a desert.

And they walk around and around, in their white frocks, "Oh ahum," "Drontons! It's all the drontons" They assert. STOCK INVESTMENTS! And I dibble at the sides of their cheeks, no no no no, no no no nom nom nom nom drool. Dab dab. It's these comrades I don't mind putting in the extra effort for, but how can it be that I'm the only one spared I think. Again and again and again- the moments of clarity as I've been told I suddenly see that they are not in frocks, we are all in frocks I see, and dab dab at my lip another friend.

Lids, lip, heavy, lip, lids, lipids. Drum, parum, sh sh sh sh, parum, parum, sh sh sh sh, that's what the old folks said at my grandma's home. My bed, it stretches out beyond my line of sight as in green. So much green, but my bed it has not molded, it has not expired, I just turned it after all. "Oh Henry, oh henry, just turn the chicken, it's not fully bad yet, just turn it they said orn the telly." The nostalgic chords of high school are striking again and again and it- oh it hurts! Musical masochism! MUSICAL MASOCHISM! And meanwhile, back at our present day storyline, the work still won't do itself, but to escape through sleep will be the cleanest of getaways, until at last, 9 hours later, I'm apprehended and brought to justice, oh wouldn't you say, A-----?

reference, seference, rambling

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