Batman the Animated Series- This is Not About Love
Title: This is Not About Love
Fandom: Batman the Animated Series
Word Count: 1,977
Characters/Pairings: Poison Ivy, Batgirl, Harley Quinn, the Joker, and Batman
Summary: Ivy, Harley, and the Joker the definiftion of insanity. Light f/f mentioned.
A/N: Written April 2009.
A definition of insanity, that Pamela Isley had often heard, was doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. The thought entered her mind when she woke up alone and saw the note that Harley Quinn had left on the refrigerator.
She huffed.
The note did not offer anything that was new to her. Harley had had a great time, but the Joker called and asked her to come back, yadda-yadda, it would probably last a month, if that.
Pamela crushed the noted in her hands and tossed it into a mulch heap.
The cycle of insanity that was her, Harley, and the Joker would continue if she didn’t take action. Unfortunately the kind of actions that would end this particular cycle were not easy solutions. She could stop caring about Harley. She could kill the Joker. She could kill Harley. She could move out of town and set up shop on a remote island where no one would bother her.
Killing Harley and not caring about her fell under the same category. It wasn’t going to happen because for whatever reason the bouncy harlequin had gotten under her skin in a way that no other human could.
Killing the Joker was very tempting. She might even be given a medal, but the man was worse than aphids. He just kept coming back.
That left moving out of town, but she had tried that before. She left and then she would come back for some reason. The reason was often Harley.
She moved through her hidden green house and started to dress. She shed her normal clothes for those of strategically placed foliage and set about tending to her garden.
As she bent down to ask a set of weeds to kindly remove themselves to another location of the garden a familiar and ominous pointed shadow pulled into her view. She kept her gaze on her flowers and spoke with a mild amount of irritation.
“Nice of you to drop by.” She eventually looked up and then smirked. It was Batgirl. That was slightly better than the Bat. “I don’t suppose you have a warrant or anything. I haven’t actually committed any crimes…lately.”
“I need your help.” Batgirl said.
Pamela laughed.
“I’m serious, Ivy!”
“I’m sure you are.” She stood up to face the young hero. She was much shorter than Batgirl. She brushed back a strand of hair from her face and arched an eyebrow. “What makes you think I’ll help you?”
“Because Harley’s been captured.”
There was a moment that was very small and completely indiscernible in which Pamela Isley, who was Poison Ivy, felt her heart seize. The moment slid off her though and she merely shrugged.
“It’s cute that you think I care.” She said softly. “When she leaves she’s not my problem.”
Batgirl was watching Ivy very closely, almost too closely, but then after a moment she nodded and turned to go. “Sorry for the mistake.”
Ivy watched the young bat ascend to the roof after shooting off her grappling gun. She knelt back down to her plants and let out a breath.
This is a perfect example of that insanity, she thought. If I go rescue her from whatever danger she’s in it starts all over again. Let the bats sort it out. Let the clown save herself.
Harley was smart enough to save herself. She was strong enough to stand on her own and Ivy knew it. She had seen it and felt it. Harley was unstoppable. She could even stand up to the Joker on occasion, if she got angry enough. She was that flower growing in the cracks of the pavement that refused to die even after being endlessly trod upon, growing back even after being plucked.
It took four hours before Poison Ivy left her garden, cursing her fate, and heading out into the Gotham night.
With a little leg work, and some helpful hints from what there was of Gotham’s plant life Ivy found Batgirl perching on the top of a roof spying down at something with a pair of binoculars in hand. The young hero just barely turned around when Ivy made a noise of contempt.
Batgirl grinned.
“Oh please stop.” Ivy said indignantly. “This isn’t what it looks like.”
“Whatever you say.” Batgirl replied and then looked through her binoculars again and scowled. “They’ve got Batman, the Joker, and Harley bound gagged and hanging precariously over a large vat of something. I’d guess acid.”
Ivy grinned. The Bat and the Joker both taken prisoner and in danger, that was a lark. She frowned then and took the binoculars from out of Batgirl’s hands. She focused on the three figures and then shifted her view over to the man at the controls over the vat.
She huffed. “That isn’t the Joker, and it isn’t the Joker at the controls either.” She folded her arms across her chest. The captured Joker look-a-like was probably what lured Harley into the warehouse. Ivy looked over at Batgirl who was sizing her up from the look of it. She rolled her eyes and said, “Well come on. Let’s go save them before the real Joker shows up and does something-“
A loud explosion pushed Ivy back and then down with a smack on the roof. She shook her head and started to pick herself up from the roof, reluctantly accepting Batgirl’s outstretched hand. She hated heroes. She hated helping heroes. She hated that deep down, for this one thing, she wanted to help.
Ivy sighed, and brushed some dirt off of herself. “Like I was saying.”
Poison Ivy shimmied down to the ground level and into the building. She could hear the sounds of a struggle as the Joker and his men began taking control of the operation. Whoever the man had been who had tied up Batman and Harley was not around for long. The vat of chemicals splashed and sizzled as the Joker pushed him in.
“Well, well what have we here? A little instant Bat death?” The Joker cackled and then stopped as something caught his attention. “That you, Harl?” He paused for a moment and then shrugged. “Oh well. Sorry Harley girl, but I have to take the opportunity as it’s given to me.” He laughed again, that insidious cackle, and pressed a button to drop the captives into the vat.
Ivy stepped out of the shadows and tossed out a few seeds that bounced once and then began to take over the warehouse tipping the vat aside. The vines sizzled slightly and then began to lap up the acid like it was water. She smiled briefly at her accomplishment. It had taken her years to find a type of vine that would feed on any liquid it was given. This was a nice test run for it.
She then jumped up to where Harley and the Bat were tied up and began to pick the locks, and loosen their gags. Her general irritation made her focus on the false Joker first. She looked him over and smirked when she loosened his gag and he said, “Hi, I’m Charlie.”
“Shut up, Charlie.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
She arched an eyebrow at the quick reply and continued her work while in the background the sounds of Batgirl making an entrance and pursuing “bad guys” could be heard. Once Batman’s bonds were even slightly loose he burst out to quickly pursue the Joker. He even managed to give Ivy something of a thankful nod, which made her roll her eyes.
Harley was excited and grateful for the rescue, but she saw the look that Ivy gave her and quickly scampered off to help the Joker escape the Batman.
“Typical.” Ivy muttered and urged the vines forward to trip up a fleeing henchman.
Poison Ivy moved quickly into the shadows once the police arrived and began hauling people off. She winced as she watched Harley throw herself around the Joker before they were both tossed into separate paddy wagons. She shook her head and turned to go. Two bats were in her way.
“Ivy-“ The Batman began to say.
“Don’t even say it.” Ivy interrupted and pushed passed him towards an exit. She heard a grapple gun go off and nodded sagely to herself. At least the Bat was smart.
“Wait, Ivy!”
Batgirl on the other hand…
Ivy turned around and waited for the young woman to say something, but met by Ivy’s harsh gaze there was nothing for the young hero to say. Ivy nodded and then left the building.
Two days passed and Ivy was working at a table cross pollinating some plants when a bat shadow caused her to look up from her work.
“Look, kid, just because I swung into action once doesn’t mean I’ll do it again. One good deed does not a hero make.” Ivy stated coolly as she delicately set down one of her tools.
“Yeah, that’s pretty apparent.” Batgirl replied and then looked down at the ground. She seemed to be considering something and finally she said, “Look, it’s just-“
“It defies everything that I am,” Ivy said and silently ordered her creeper plant to come up. With a swift and violent motion the plant had brutally entangled Batgirl and pulled her back against a wall. Ivy walked up to Batgirl slowly and watched the young woman struggle for a moment before ordering the vines to let her go. Batgirl dropped to her knees and looked up into Ivy’s green eyes, her sad and lonely green eyes.
“I’m giving you this one intrusion for free, Batgirl. It’s not because I want you to live, but because I know your boss isn’t stupid and probably knows you’re here.” She bent down and plucked a flower from the ground. It was a small purple wildflower. “I know why you think I helped you. It’s a very sweet sentiment and might have some bearing, but I only did it to prove something to myself.”
“What was that?”
“That I don’t matter in her world, you stupid rodent!” Ivy raged. “I saved her life from that maniacal clown and she ran to his arms the moment the cops cuffed him! I mean, really!” She took a deep breath and then calmed herself. “I could hand her the world on a silver platter and she’d still turn to me and ask, ‘But what about Mr. J?’”
Ivy dropped the flower in front of Batgirl and began to walk away. It was time for her to move on from that place, at least for a little while. Long enough to try and forget, maybe, and the thought made her want to laugh and cry all at the same time.
This was insanity, she thought, expecting something different after knowing the logical results.
She paused. Batgirl was still there on the ground, watching her. Several reasons for the delay in the young bat’s departure entered Ivy’s mind, and they were all stupid and sweet and completely improbable. And yet, Ivy had to smile, just a little bit, to herself. It was too risky to even dare at the moment, and honestly Ivy wasn’t up to trying to figure out if her guesses were even correct.
“I think you know the way out.” Ivy said softly.
Batgirl stood up and watched the woman step away. She fired off her grapple gun and rose to the roof. She closed the green house window she had entered from quietly, and turned to watch a dark figure approaching.
“Well?”
“You were right,” Batgirl said softly.
The figured nodded and disappeared back into the shadows.
Batgirl shut her eyes and then shook her head.
I was right too, she thought. I was totally right about, Ivy.
End.
Fandom: Batman the Animated Series
Word Count: 1,977
Characters/Pairings: Poison Ivy, Batgirl, Harley Quinn, the Joker, and Batman
Summary: Ivy, Harley, and the Joker the definiftion of insanity. Light f/f mentioned.
A/N: Written April 2009.
A definition of insanity, that Pamela Isley had often heard, was doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. The thought entered her mind when she woke up alone and saw the note that Harley Quinn had left on the refrigerator.
She huffed.
The note did not offer anything that was new to her. Harley had had a great time, but the Joker called and asked her to come back, yadda-yadda, it would probably last a month, if that.
Pamela crushed the noted in her hands and tossed it into a mulch heap.
The cycle of insanity that was her, Harley, and the Joker would continue if she didn’t take action. Unfortunately the kind of actions that would end this particular cycle were not easy solutions. She could stop caring about Harley. She could kill the Joker. She could kill Harley. She could move out of town and set up shop on a remote island where no one would bother her.
Killing Harley and not caring about her fell under the same category. It wasn’t going to happen because for whatever reason the bouncy harlequin had gotten under her skin in a way that no other human could.
Killing the Joker was very tempting. She might even be given a medal, but the man was worse than aphids. He just kept coming back.
That left moving out of town, but she had tried that before. She left and then she would come back for some reason. The reason was often Harley.
She moved through her hidden green house and started to dress. She shed her normal clothes for those of strategically placed foliage and set about tending to her garden.
As she bent down to ask a set of weeds to kindly remove themselves to another location of the garden a familiar and ominous pointed shadow pulled into her view. She kept her gaze on her flowers and spoke with a mild amount of irritation.
“Nice of you to drop by.” She eventually looked up and then smirked. It was Batgirl. That was slightly better than the Bat. “I don’t suppose you have a warrant or anything. I haven’t actually committed any crimes…lately.”
“I need your help.” Batgirl said.
Pamela laughed.
“I’m serious, Ivy!”
“I’m sure you are.” She stood up to face the young hero. She was much shorter than Batgirl. She brushed back a strand of hair from her face and arched an eyebrow. “What makes you think I’ll help you?”
“Because Harley’s been captured.”
There was a moment that was very small and completely indiscernible in which Pamela Isley, who was Poison Ivy, felt her heart seize. The moment slid off her though and she merely shrugged.
“It’s cute that you think I care.” She said softly. “When she leaves she’s not my problem.”
Batgirl was watching Ivy very closely, almost too closely, but then after a moment she nodded and turned to go. “Sorry for the mistake.”
Ivy watched the young bat ascend to the roof after shooting off her grappling gun. She knelt back down to her plants and let out a breath.
This is a perfect example of that insanity, she thought. If I go rescue her from whatever danger she’s in it starts all over again. Let the bats sort it out. Let the clown save herself.
Harley was smart enough to save herself. She was strong enough to stand on her own and Ivy knew it. She had seen it and felt it. Harley was unstoppable. She could even stand up to the Joker on occasion, if she got angry enough. She was that flower growing in the cracks of the pavement that refused to die even after being endlessly trod upon, growing back even after being plucked.
It took four hours before Poison Ivy left her garden, cursing her fate, and heading out into the Gotham night.
With a little leg work, and some helpful hints from what there was of Gotham’s plant life Ivy found Batgirl perching on the top of a roof spying down at something with a pair of binoculars in hand. The young hero just barely turned around when Ivy made a noise of contempt.
Batgirl grinned.
“Oh please stop.” Ivy said indignantly. “This isn’t what it looks like.”
“Whatever you say.” Batgirl replied and then looked through her binoculars again and scowled. “They’ve got Batman, the Joker, and Harley bound gagged and hanging precariously over a large vat of something. I’d guess acid.”
Ivy grinned. The Bat and the Joker both taken prisoner and in danger, that was a lark. She frowned then and took the binoculars from out of Batgirl’s hands. She focused on the three figures and then shifted her view over to the man at the controls over the vat.
She huffed. “That isn’t the Joker, and it isn’t the Joker at the controls either.” She folded her arms across her chest. The captured Joker look-a-like was probably what lured Harley into the warehouse. Ivy looked over at Batgirl who was sizing her up from the look of it. She rolled her eyes and said, “Well come on. Let’s go save them before the real Joker shows up and does something-“
A loud explosion pushed Ivy back and then down with a smack on the roof. She shook her head and started to pick herself up from the roof, reluctantly accepting Batgirl’s outstretched hand. She hated heroes. She hated helping heroes. She hated that deep down, for this one thing, she wanted to help.
Ivy sighed, and brushed some dirt off of herself. “Like I was saying.”
Poison Ivy shimmied down to the ground level and into the building. She could hear the sounds of a struggle as the Joker and his men began taking control of the operation. Whoever the man had been who had tied up Batman and Harley was not around for long. The vat of chemicals splashed and sizzled as the Joker pushed him in.
“Well, well what have we here? A little instant Bat death?” The Joker cackled and then stopped as something caught his attention. “That you, Harl?” He paused for a moment and then shrugged. “Oh well. Sorry Harley girl, but I have to take the opportunity as it’s given to me.” He laughed again, that insidious cackle, and pressed a button to drop the captives into the vat.
Ivy stepped out of the shadows and tossed out a few seeds that bounced once and then began to take over the warehouse tipping the vat aside. The vines sizzled slightly and then began to lap up the acid like it was water. She smiled briefly at her accomplishment. It had taken her years to find a type of vine that would feed on any liquid it was given. This was a nice test run for it.
She then jumped up to where Harley and the Bat were tied up and began to pick the locks, and loosen their gags. Her general irritation made her focus on the false Joker first. She looked him over and smirked when she loosened his gag and he said, “Hi, I’m Charlie.”
“Shut up, Charlie.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
She arched an eyebrow at the quick reply and continued her work while in the background the sounds of Batgirl making an entrance and pursuing “bad guys” could be heard. Once Batman’s bonds were even slightly loose he burst out to quickly pursue the Joker. He even managed to give Ivy something of a thankful nod, which made her roll her eyes.
Harley was excited and grateful for the rescue, but she saw the look that Ivy gave her and quickly scampered off to help the Joker escape the Batman.
“Typical.” Ivy muttered and urged the vines forward to trip up a fleeing henchman.
Poison Ivy moved quickly into the shadows once the police arrived and began hauling people off. She winced as she watched Harley throw herself around the Joker before they were both tossed into separate paddy wagons. She shook her head and turned to go. Two bats were in her way.
“Ivy-“ The Batman began to say.
“Don’t even say it.” Ivy interrupted and pushed passed him towards an exit. She heard a grapple gun go off and nodded sagely to herself. At least the Bat was smart.
“Wait, Ivy!”
Batgirl on the other hand…
Ivy turned around and waited for the young woman to say something, but met by Ivy’s harsh gaze there was nothing for the young hero to say. Ivy nodded and then left the building.
Two days passed and Ivy was working at a table cross pollinating some plants when a bat shadow caused her to look up from her work.
“Look, kid, just because I swung into action once doesn’t mean I’ll do it again. One good deed does not a hero make.” Ivy stated coolly as she delicately set down one of her tools.
“Yeah, that’s pretty apparent.” Batgirl replied and then looked down at the ground. She seemed to be considering something and finally she said, “Look, it’s just-“
“It defies everything that I am,” Ivy said and silently ordered her creeper plant to come up. With a swift and violent motion the plant had brutally entangled Batgirl and pulled her back against a wall. Ivy walked up to Batgirl slowly and watched the young woman struggle for a moment before ordering the vines to let her go. Batgirl dropped to her knees and looked up into Ivy’s green eyes, her sad and lonely green eyes.
“I’m giving you this one intrusion for free, Batgirl. It’s not because I want you to live, but because I know your boss isn’t stupid and probably knows you’re here.” She bent down and plucked a flower from the ground. It was a small purple wildflower. “I know why you think I helped you. It’s a very sweet sentiment and might have some bearing, but I only did it to prove something to myself.”
“What was that?”
“That I don’t matter in her world, you stupid rodent!” Ivy raged. “I saved her life from that maniacal clown and she ran to his arms the moment the cops cuffed him! I mean, really!” She took a deep breath and then calmed herself. “I could hand her the world on a silver platter and she’d still turn to me and ask, ‘But what about Mr. J?’”
Ivy dropped the flower in front of Batgirl and began to walk away. It was time for her to move on from that place, at least for a little while. Long enough to try and forget, maybe, and the thought made her want to laugh and cry all at the same time.
This was insanity, she thought, expecting something different after knowing the logical results.
She paused. Batgirl was still there on the ground, watching her. Several reasons for the delay in the young bat’s departure entered Ivy’s mind, and they were all stupid and sweet and completely improbable. And yet, Ivy had to smile, just a little bit, to herself. It was too risky to even dare at the moment, and honestly Ivy wasn’t up to trying to figure out if her guesses were even correct.
“I think you know the way out.” Ivy said softly.
Batgirl stood up and watched the woman step away. She fired off her grapple gun and rose to the roof. She closed the green house window she had entered from quietly, and turned to watch a dark figure approaching.
“Well?”
“You were right,” Batgirl said softly.
The figured nodded and disappeared back into the shadows.
Batgirl shut her eyes and then shook her head.
I was right too, she thought. I was totally right about, Ivy.
End.