How We Lose People

[conqueror49worm]

I etched the letter 'E' into my desk
at the detox on Lakeshore. (Lord made sure)
I'm a fuck-up junkie,
but I'm one lucky horse.
The flakes were only three weeks away,
and there are owls to be saved. (Every day)
I'm scraping by, neither shoe tied,
Windy City shaving ice off your grave (site
since you died).

I bought four bottles with the money I owed you,
and I drank it down with the mouth that wouldn't go;
and I screwed on each cap
tight enough to nail my hands to the floor.

(x) I want to fix you up in twill tape
and put in coffins all your coughs
and sit you down in dandelions,
but that's not the brand of sick you got.
(You were never going to get better.)
I just want to get better
at understanding how we lose (the ones we love)
people.

I'm not pining to be holding your hand,
getting lost in the corn maze. (By God's grace),
the ears were just eye high
with both our eyebrows raised
'cause I deserve only gutter cigarettes
and everybody's hangdog looks. (Line and hook),
what's a lure to a shark
when you're the fish it took?

If we had the eyes of owls,
if we could crane our necks that far,
we still wouldn't see it coming.
We see only the handle on the door.