[ hey it's not an awkward question it's a legitimate concern!! He listens to Ryouta chatter and chatter away for a little bit longer before he tries to interrupt. ] Can I... ask you something?
Wha-- errr, love? To me? [dgsjhsf stop tripping over your own tongue] Well, uh... That's kinda vague, um... I guess it varies for different birdies, but uh, you specified me, huh... [STOP STAMMERING OH MY GOD.]
[ That... that fits his feelings really well... He looks away nervously, trying everything he can to compose himself. There aren't that many birdies around, unfortunately, so he can't just distract himself by watching someone else. ] The feeling just... appears, correct?
Uh.... [He scratches his head thoughtfully. He wants to answer Nageki as well as possible, but.... that's embarrassing, and he just doesn't have a straight answer, anyway.]
I don't really know, t'be honest. It's hard to tell sometimes, I guess, even with that...
[He looks a little embarrassed, but shrugs lightly.] What about you, Nageki?
[ And that makes him feel like his heart's stopped. Those few simple words, combined together to make such a hopeless sentence. Nageki's throat clenches and he tries so hard to not say anything, to not show anything... but he notices himself tearing up and all he can think is "this cannot happen, I can't be here anymore, I have to disappear now".
Why bother? Is it so hard to have someone who loves him? Is that even possible for someone like him? Nageki let himself believe that Ryouta could be that bird... but maybe he's not. Maybe there isn't anybirdie. Maybe he'll never get that clique and stereotypical fairy tale ending where someone actually wants to be with him forever.
He stands up, his back to Ryouta. The silent tears have started, and he knows that if he looks at him now he won't be able to stop. ] ... Yes. [ His voice is light, almost a whisper. After a shaky breath, though, it returns to its usual clarity. ]
I... I'm sorry. I have to go. [ He's quick to move away and disappear within the shelves of the library before
( ... )
Ryouta's chattering away as usual!! Are you going to ask him awkward questions today?]
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Sure! Go ahead and shoot. [He looks attentive.]
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......
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[He frowns briefly, trying to work the question for himself in his mind. Hiyoko fit in there somewhere, once, but... not so much, anymore.]
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I don't really know, t'be honest. It's hard to tell sometimes, I guess, even with that...
[He looks a little embarrassed, but shrugs lightly.] What about you, Nageki?
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Why bother? Is it so hard to have someone who loves him? Is that even possible for someone like him? Nageki let himself believe that Ryouta could be that bird... but maybe he's not. Maybe there isn't anybirdie. Maybe he'll never get that clique and stereotypical fairy tale ending where someone actually wants to be with him forever.
He stands up, his back to Ryouta. The silent tears have started, and he knows that if he looks at him now he won't be able to stop. ] ... Yes. [ His voice is light, almost a whisper. After a shaky breath, though, it returns to its usual clarity. ]
I... I'm sorry. I have to go. [ He's quick to move away and disappear within the shelves of the library before ( ... )
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