Being raised poor
I am the youngest of seven siblings. My parents were, and continue, to be, two hard working independent people who migrated to the United States in order for their children to become successful. I have so much love and respect for them.
Be independent, and do not rely on people: My parents taught my siblings and me to be hard workers. Good looks will fade, but whatever trade you know how to do will pay the bills.
Only once in my entire childhood did my parents rely on food stamps, and once my dad found another job we were back to eating beans and tortillas every day. My parents had too much pride to accept help from the government even though they paid taxes.
We I first became unemployed, 5 years ago; I was eligible to receive unemployment benefits. I was living with my parents at the time, and my father told me if I apply for unemployment benefits he would kick me out of his house. He said that I am not lazy, so I shouldn't apply for the benefits. He was right. It took me less than a week to find a full time job.
Work to get what you want and need: We didn't get an allowance; we had to make our own money.
My brother and sisters used to get ultra early to beat the bums in order for us to collect cans for money.
When I was a senior in high school I knew my parents were unable to pay for my college. They said that if I wanted to attend college I would have to figure out how to get it paid. Good old financial aid and scholarships.
I learned how to drive by the time I was 15 years old, but I didn't purchase a vehicle until I was 20 years old.
If you are hungry you will eat whatever is offered: We didn't have a choice on what we ate.
At times my parents would sacrifice not eating for the day rather than leaving us to starve.
Junk food to my siblings and I was cereal and milk. If it was purchased it was eaten on the same day.
My favorite meal was chicken feet.
My brothers and sisters would get excited to go to school. Not because we were eager to learn new things, but because we were able to eat breakfast and lunch.
My 65 year old father, who still works 50 hours a week, comes home after work to eat his bowl of beans.
Wear whatever is available: We either wore hand me downs, thrift store clothes or homemade clothes.
My mom was able to turn curtains into beautiful dresses we could wear to church.
As a child I would always hate the first day of school, because everyone would wear new clothes while we got stuck wearing used clothes.
Holidays: We didn’t really celebrate
I knew there wasn’t a Santa Claus at a young age, because we NEVER received gifts.
My family barely started celebrating Thanksgiving in 2006. We don’t eat turkey instead we eat tamales.
Getting sick: If we were sick we were never taken to the doctor, because we had no money or health insurance.
My mom would 'cure" us with her herbal remedies. I learned, from my father, when you think you are sick you are able to cure yourself by fooling your head into thinking you feel better.
Marriage: My parents do not believe in divorce.
I have always been so envious of my parents’ relationship; I want what they have. They have argued numerous times, but they were always able to make up. As much as my mom would try to abandon my brothers and sisters my father would always find her.
Housing: No privacy: 9 people living in a two bedroom duplex with one restroom…ENOUGH SAID.
As a child my family lived in rat and roach infested houses. My parents’ room was the living room. They would sleep on an uncomfortable fold out couch they purchased at a thrift store. They didn’t get their own room until I was 17 years old. Can you imagine not having a bedroom for that long? I shared a bed with my sisters until I was 16 years old.
No a/c in the summer and no heating in the winter. Summer was spent passing out due to heat exhaustion. I would go to sleep with a wet bath towel on my body to keep me cool. Winter was spent putting on layers and constantly moving to keep warm.
One person would be showering while another person was brushing their teeth.
I didn’t see cable channels until I was in college.
Transportation: If the car broke down, take the bus, if you have no money to take the bus, then use your legs to walk.
My parents only had one vehicle. My father would let my mother drive the car to work and he would take the bus to work; however, whenever the car would breakdown they resorted to taking the bus. Imagine if you will seven kids with their parents…on the bus…to go grocery shopping. Yes, I am sure it looks funny, but you have to run errands with or without a vehicle.
Every Sunday all 9 of us would wake up extra early, put on our Sunday’s best, and walk 2 miles to church and 2 miles back home. People felt bad and offered my family rides to church or to our house, but my parents would ALWAYS declined the offer. Wearing dress shoes and walking 4 miles really can give you blisters, but eventually we got used to walking the distance.
As a child I would always say that it wasn’t fair that I didn’t get name brand clothes, and there was only one restroom to share with 9 people living in a two bedroom duplex. If I would have been born in Mexico I would have been married to a cousin at the age of 13, and I would have 5 kids by the time I was 20. All because I know I wouldn’t have choice.
I was raised dirt poor; however, I am so grateful to have experienced that. It has shaped me to be a hardworking, independent woman. I can see why I am a vegetarian, and why I am not materialistic, and why I am not lazy, and not interested in marrying someone for their wealth. At the end of the day my parents were able to provide clothes, food, shelter, and love. That is what matters, and till this day I thank my parents for my upbringing.