these hands are for moving
Saturday night I hung out at my friend Kari's house for a few hours. She mentioned something about sexual text messages that I had sent to her phone Friday night. I had not sent any such messages. The messages she received read as follows:
12:16 AM 05/01/04 from: VinegarAndSpice
yes im wet and ready for you
12:59 AM 05/01/04 from: VinegarAndSpice
Ok, slip in nice and slow
I checked the number they were from and it was not mine. Most importantly, I would never use the alias "Vinegar And Spice." She assumed they were from me because she hadn't programmed my number into her phone yet. So I called the guy from my phone and asked him about the messages. In a slurred voice, most likely the product of a night spent chugging Natty, he explained that he had sent the messages to the wrong number. He apologized; I told him it wasn't a problem; we hung up.
Then, about 20 minutes later my phone began to vibrate. It was VinegarAndSpice. I answered and he asked, "Hey, those people get mad about those text messages? They wusn't young kids'r nuthin were they?" I told him it wasn't a problem and that we thought they were funny. He then asks, "So, you into that stuff or what?" I told him again that I thought it was funny. He tried to explain to me this service provided by T-Mobile (I think he called it T-Zone) with which you can take part in what sounded like an adult cell phone chatroom. I told him I would check it out and said bye.
At this point I had programmed his number into my phone under 'Weirdo.' A few minutes later I decided to text message Weirdo. A hot cell phone cyber session followed. The message log is quoted exactly from the messages. The capitalization and punctuation are verbatim.
2:00 AM 05/02/04 (C.Wiz to Weirdo)
I slowly remove my man-thong.
2:05 AM 05/02/04 (Weirdo to C.Wiz)
That's what I thought
(At this point, I edited his name. He became 'Weirdo Schmeirdo.')
2:08 AM 05/02/04 (C.Wiz to Weirdo S.)
Sweat begins to drip from my scrotum.
2:11 AM 05/02/04 (Weirdo S. to C.Wiz)
Is your dick hard as you catch in you month? (Attempts to explain this should be directed to the comments page.)
2:12 AM 05/02/04 (C.Wiz to Weirdo S.)
Our scrotii* begin to sweat in unison.!?
*I figured if 'scrotii' wasn't the plural of scrotum, it should be. I just checked Merriam-Webster.com and it's actually 'scrota' or 'scrotums'.
After that last message, I received no response. I hope to continue my correspondence with Mr. Schmeirdo in the future.
12:16 AM 05/01/04 from: VinegarAndSpice
yes im wet and ready for you
12:59 AM 05/01/04 from: VinegarAndSpice
Ok, slip in nice and slow
I checked the number they were from and it was not mine. Most importantly, I would never use the alias "Vinegar And Spice." She assumed they were from me because she hadn't programmed my number into her phone yet. So I called the guy from my phone and asked him about the messages. In a slurred voice, most likely the product of a night spent chugging Natty, he explained that he had sent the messages to the wrong number. He apologized; I told him it wasn't a problem; we hung up.
Then, about 20 minutes later my phone began to vibrate. It was VinegarAndSpice. I answered and he asked, "Hey, those people get mad about those text messages? They wusn't young kids'r nuthin were they?" I told him it wasn't a problem and that we thought they were funny. He then asks, "So, you into that stuff or what?" I told him again that I thought it was funny. He tried to explain to me this service provided by T-Mobile (I think he called it T-Zone) with which you can take part in what sounded like an adult cell phone chatroom. I told him I would check it out and said bye.
At this point I had programmed his number into my phone under 'Weirdo.' A few minutes later I decided to text message Weirdo. A hot cell phone cyber session followed. The message log is quoted exactly from the messages. The capitalization and punctuation are verbatim.
2:00 AM 05/02/04 (C.Wiz to Weirdo)
I slowly remove my man-thong.
2:05 AM 05/02/04 (Weirdo to C.Wiz)
That's what I thought
(At this point, I edited his name. He became 'Weirdo Schmeirdo.')
2:08 AM 05/02/04 (C.Wiz to Weirdo S.)
Sweat begins to drip from my scrotum.
2:11 AM 05/02/04 (Weirdo S. to C.Wiz)
Is your dick hard as you catch in you month? (Attempts to explain this should be directed to the comments page.)
2:12 AM 05/02/04 (C.Wiz to Weirdo S.)
Our scrotii* begin to sweat in unison.!?
*I figured if 'scrotii' wasn't the plural of scrotum, it should be. I just checked Merriam-Webster.com and it's actually 'scrota' or 'scrotums'.
After that last message, I received no response. I hope to continue my correspondence with Mr. Schmeirdo in the future.