(Untitled)

[conformalmap]

I have often noted that I'm bad at complaining. I'm good at bitching. I don't mind whining for fun, or when it's not really relevant, or just to get on people's nerves. But I am terrible -- to the point of meekness -- at asserting true, legitimate complaints

Comments

[iwaswinged]

I worked in my college's development office (we called it advancement) and have no question - once you've given at a certain level, they will expect that you can and will do it again. Unless you say no, and explain it to them. Then they still might ask, but they probably will be less likely to pull out the big guns. If you're sure you don't want to give at that level again, particularly because your previous giving was, in your mind, timed purposefully, let that be known. If you continue to give some ammount, they'll likely respect you more than if you stop all together, but it's possible that the result, instead of you agreeing to give away money you don't want to give away, is that in the future when they're looking for funding for projects they think you might like, they'll come to you.

There's a lot of power that comes with money, and there are a lot of people much much less thoughtful and useful than you who take advantage ofthat power. If you're able to let the school know, demonstratively, when you agree with what they're doing, they'll start to think about how they can keep you agreeing. (Of course, this will be the case more and more as years go buy and you start attaching more zeros to the end of that donation amount, but if they're anything like the office I worked at, they'll keep their eyes on you)

[conformalmap]

This is a good point. Man, the example was a lot more specific than my general crisis. [tl;dr version: I think I have no right to complain about anything, ever, for any reason.]

[electricdust]

there is no rule that says being privileged (in any way) means you forfeit your right to complain/say no.

If someone gives you a look instead of taking time to understand your position, it is their lack of insight, not your lack of character or empathy that cause them to do so.

A man said to the universe:
"Sir I exist!"
"However," replied the universe,
"The fact has not created in me
A sense of obligation."

-- Stephen Crane