the dilema
So im in this dilema.
from now until july im working part time then full time in the summer so gar and i can go to poland and stay for a month with my family and see where it is a grew up and the people who basicly raised me. I wanted to go and see my grandma also because shes my last grandparent and shes very old and her health isnt what it used to be.
However
since gar graduates in july and moves back to new york in search of full time job and a home we were talking about getting an appartment together. if we wanted to do this realisticly then saving all our money from this point forward for the down payment as well as first months rent and other stuff for the appartment would have to happen. We could put it more to chance and go to poland then figure shit out when we come back, or he could find his own place and i could continue todorm on campus.
Im really scared of moving in with him because im afraid that it might not work or i may want to move out and live on my own or on campus because we have lived separated totally for soon to be a year and by the time he graduates over a year. We only see eachother for a few days every couple months.
the idea of saving all our money and getting an appartment together over the summer is so romantic and fun. but i fear it because im crazy and i've been fearing everything lately.
I think i may just live on campus and he can get an appartment and i'll stay over at his house when i want anbd if i choose to move in with him i can do that second semester. But then again im scared of him living on his own because at his school he cant have girls over, but at his own appartment ofcourse he can, im afraid of him cheating, leaving me, etc once he gets himself on his feet. Im scared of everything and anything.Im incredibly in secure right now, But then again hes in nashville, 900 miles away all by himself so if he were to cheat hed have done it already...so why do i worry? or why should i?
???????????
UGH!!!!
from now until july im working part time then full time in the summer so gar and i can go to poland and stay for a month with my family and see where it is a grew up and the people who basicly raised me. I wanted to go and see my grandma also because shes my last grandparent and shes very old and her health isnt what it used to be.
However
since gar graduates in july and moves back to new york in search of full time job and a home we were talking about getting an appartment together. if we wanted to do this realisticly then saving all our money from this point forward for the down payment as well as first months rent and other stuff for the appartment would have to happen. We could put it more to chance and go to poland then figure shit out when we come back, or he could find his own place and i could continue todorm on campus.
Im really scared of moving in with him because im afraid that it might not work or i may want to move out and live on my own or on campus because we have lived separated totally for soon to be a year and by the time he graduates over a year. We only see eachother for a few days every couple months.
the idea of saving all our money and getting an appartment together over the summer is so romantic and fun. but i fear it because im crazy and i've been fearing everything lately.
I think i may just live on campus and he can get an appartment and i'll stay over at his house when i want anbd if i choose to move in with him i can do that second semester. But then again im scared of him living on his own because at his school he cant have girls over, but at his own appartment ofcourse he can, im afraid of him cheating, leaving me, etc once he gets himself on his feet. Im scared of everything and anything.Im incredibly in secure right now, But then again hes in nashville, 900 miles away all by himself so if he were to cheat hed have done it already...so why do i worry? or why should i?
???????????
UGH!!!!