Recovering
Yesterday was insane. It started with me getting a call on Sunday to substitute for a 7th grade science class; no big deal. I stayed up late, as usual, the night before. I wasn't worried because this teacher usually has well-disciplined students. Boy was I wrong. These kids made the demon spawn of Satan look like model Sunday school students. How many times do I need to say that you can't leave the room? No, you can't go to the bathroom, you just had break (or lunch). Why is there talking when the assignment is *silent* reading? It just got progressively worse and worse. Plus, I couldn't find any referral forms. On Friday, I will be better prepared when I go back (not the same teacher). After swinging by the bank to deposit last month's check from the district I headed home and had 30 minutes to decompress. That's when my lack of sleep really hit me. Driving to Los Altos was a lesson in driving while sleepy. Luckily, I left early enough to give myself plenty of time to get to work at normal speeds. Due to a scheduling conflict, two early readers who were not on my schedule (and who I'd never worked with before) got bounced to my table. I really hate when that happens considering that early readers are my kryptonite. Luckily, they were both pretty easy going and didn't give me any trouble. The second hour rocked... cause I wasn't scheduled to teach. So I got to catch up on my binders and get in some admin time (which pays more than prep time). The third hour was cool cause I only had one student, a new boy in the math program. He seemed really eager to learn and didn't get disheartened when he didn't do so well on a reassessment. Due to a bunch of almost guaranteed absences I was able to skip out on my fourth hour and head to the munch. I really needed that. I don't think it will ever be as big as it was when it was on The Alameda, but it was a nice crowd with a lot of familiar faces. I was a bit worried when Charles in Charge walked in toward the end but, thankfully, he didn't sit near me and, from what I could hear, didn't really get into a heavy discussion. I'm not as concerned about him as I once was, but I will have to keep an eye on him in the future and have the ball gag ready for when the topic switches to a discussion about BDSM, D/S or M/s. Oh yeah, and my hours are back. That lax, light schedule didn't really last too long. I'm definitely going to look into that job today.
On a side note, the cuffs I bought on Saturday are right comfy... as I've slept in them the past three nights. I wish there was someone that could help me break them in. 8)
For some reason, I can't get this song out of my head.
Shame by Stabbing Westward
I only see myself reflected in your eyes
So all that I believe I am essentially are lies
And everything I've hoped to be or ever thought I was
Died with your belief in me so who the hell am I?
I don't know if I'm real without you
What is left of me without you?
I don't know whats real without you
How can I exist without you?
I'm wondering 'round confused
Wondering why I try
The more that you deny my pain
The more it intensifies...
I pray for someone to ache for me the way I ache for you...
If you ignore that I'm alive
I've nothing to cling to
I don't know if I'm real without you
What is left of me without you?
I don't know whats real without you
How can I exist without you?
I stare into this mirror
So tired of this life
If only you would speak to me or care if I'm alive
Once I swore I would die for you
But I never meant it like this
I never meant like this
no i never meant like this
I don't know if I'm real without you
What is left of me without you?
I don't know whats real without you
How can I exist without you?
How can I exist without you?
How can I exist without you?