Random thoughts, quotes and memories
BDSM
/* While getting beat on by a female top */
Me: "Damn, you hit like a girl."
Me: "Ow! That fuckin' hurt."
Top currently hitting me: "And what do we say?"
Me: "Thank you!"
Warcraft III
/* While playing with a friend */
Me: (After sending an abomination to follow a sprite.) "Ooo, I wanna touch the shiny."
/* While playing with a friend against six computers in a 2v3v3 game */
Me: "Found red... and blue... and pink, shit. We're gonna need a few moments of silence."
Work
/* While working at a video store.*/
Me: "You know the best part of this job?"
Coworker: "Free rentals?"
Me: "Nah man. Hot chicks givin' me their numbers."
Coworker: (Motions over with his head.) "Customer."
Me: "Hi." (I look up and notice that the customer is very hot.)
Me: (Enthusiastically and trying to keep a straight face.) "Phone number on the account?"
Customer: (Slides membership card over) "Here's my card, but that was cute."
Random student: "I wanna be president."
Me: "When that happens, I'm moving to Canada."
Random student: "I plan to be rich when I grow up."
Me: "And just how are you going to become rich?"
Random student: "I'm gonna make a lot of money."
Me: "Doing what, exactly?"
Random Student: "I dunno, winning the lottery."
*Headdesk*
Random
A bumper sticker I fully expect to see in the future:
My child shot your honor student.
Me: "Ah!"
Friend: "What?!?!"
Me: "You just ran a stop sign back there!"
Friend: "Oh."
Me: "Sh..Should we go back?"
/* While playing Starcraft over Bnet. */
Me: "Ah, I'm being attacked. Help me out."
Teammate: "Wait, this is awesome, lemme get a screenshot."
Me: "Fuck the screenshot, save my ass!!" (I didn't survive the onslaught.)
/* While playing Homeworld with a friend. */
Me: Beware of the claw. (formation) It scratch you.
/* While getting beat on by a female top */
Me: "Damn, you hit like a girl."
Me: "Ow! That fuckin' hurt."
Top currently hitting me: "And what do we say?"
Me: "Thank you!"
Warcraft III
/* While playing with a friend */
Me: (After sending an abomination to follow a sprite.) "Ooo, I wanna touch the shiny."
/* While playing with a friend against six computers in a 2v3v3 game */
Me: "Found red... and blue... and pink, shit. We're gonna need a few moments of silence."
Work
/* While working at a video store.*/
Me: "You know the best part of this job?"
Coworker: "Free rentals?"
Me: "Nah man. Hot chicks givin' me their numbers."
Coworker: (Motions over with his head.) "Customer."
Me: "Hi." (I look up and notice that the customer is very hot.)
Me: (Enthusiastically and trying to keep a straight face.) "Phone number on the account?"
Customer: (Slides membership card over) "Here's my card, but that was cute."
Random student: "I wanna be president."
Me: "When that happens, I'm moving to Canada."
Random student: "I plan to be rich when I grow up."
Me: "And just how are you going to become rich?"
Random student: "I'm gonna make a lot of money."
Me: "Doing what, exactly?"
Random Student: "I dunno, winning the lottery."
*Headdesk*
Random
A bumper sticker I fully expect to see in the future:
My child shot your honor student.
Me: "Ah!"
Friend: "What?!?!"
Me: "You just ran a stop sign back there!"
Friend: "Oh."
Me: "Sh..Should we go back?"
/* While playing Starcraft over Bnet. */
Me: "Ah, I'm being attacked. Help me out."
Teammate: "Wait, this is awesome, lemme get a screenshot."
Me: "Fuck the screenshot, save my ass!!" (I didn't survive the onslaught.)
/* While playing Homeworld with a friend. */
Me: Beware of the claw. (formation) It scratch you.