...numbly rehearsing the ancient ways in a blur of forgetfulness.
But today, the ritual gives no comfort.
A few weeks ago, I took my newly acquired unemployment check and invested in a seed starter kit, some potting soil (The stuff in the shed was way too dried out.) and a few packets of seeds (corn, squash, basil, and cherry tomatoes) from OSH. After doing a quick inventory of the various planters in the backyard, I realized that even if only half of the seeds germinate, I'm still going to be wanting for planting space. Since the squash and tomatoes can grow down from hanging planters, I set about making a few planters from empty soda bottles. Not happy with one plant per bottle, I went to work with a hole saw and some duct tape and made two planters that would hold two plants comfortably. The only problem was that it used about a foot and a half of rope for suspension. I wanted to cut that down and toyed around with the remaining bottles until I hit upon the idea of having four plants per bottle in a more compact design; and it used less than half the rope to boot. From that day to this I've been braving the wilderness that is the backyard to tend to the planted seeds. Yesterday I spent most of the day cleaning up the barbecue. It's a transplant from my parents' place; they traded up for the big one they had down here. Apparently, they just dumped it here and left it. The grease catcher had been stored on top of it in a plastic bag that had pretty much disentigrated over the past two years. I gloved up, hosed it off and took a stainless steel scouring pad to it and got much of the flaky gunk off it. When I opened the top, I noticed that the grill had a slight covering of rust... and a ton of old spiderwebs. I cleaned the spiderwebs off and made a note to pick up a grill scraper the next time I was at the store. This was going to be an ongoing project. I also need to find a place to fill up the two propane tanks here at the house (and I'm pretty sure a nearby 76 Station can do that).
After starting a second load of dishes in the dishwasher, I left for the library. I didn't expect such a deluge of email, then I realized my mistake. I didn't go Saturday and they were closed Sunday and Monday. A lot of it was from Facebook and I felt some weird feelings connecting with friends and family I hadn't seen or heard from in over a decade. I was surprised to find one friend in particular as she had continually stated in high school that she disliked using computers and email. I guess times have changed (although she didn't know what LJ was,*headdesk*). After catching up on LJ, FB (really Farm Town), Twitter and email, I punched up my resume a bit, checked out a few household repair books then headed to subSpace. I had been feeling depressed this whole month and was actually good about *not* using food to make myself feel better. Unfortunately this led to me burning up a lot of time doing absolutely nothing (Literally, nothing; just sitting somewhere in silence and willing myself to not do anything.).
I got there a bit early and chatted with the few people that were already there. I didn't go in with any expectations; that tends to yield the best results. I really liked the format this time, unfortunately, the focus didn't get all the way around. When we ended, I felt like I continued to slip through the cracks.
A full night's sleep calmed me down, but now I just feel numb to everything.
A few weeks ago, I took my newly acquired unemployment check and invested in a seed starter kit, some potting soil (The stuff in the shed was way too dried out.) and a few packets of seeds (corn, squash, basil, and cherry tomatoes) from OSH. After doing a quick inventory of the various planters in the backyard, I realized that even if only half of the seeds germinate, I'm still going to be wanting for planting space. Since the squash and tomatoes can grow down from hanging planters, I set about making a few planters from empty soda bottles. Not happy with one plant per bottle, I went to work with a hole saw and some duct tape and made two planters that would hold two plants comfortably. The only problem was that it used about a foot and a half of rope for suspension. I wanted to cut that down and toyed around with the remaining bottles until I hit upon the idea of having four plants per bottle in a more compact design; and it used less than half the rope to boot. From that day to this I've been braving the wilderness that is the backyard to tend to the planted seeds. Yesterday I spent most of the day cleaning up the barbecue. It's a transplant from my parents' place; they traded up for the big one they had down here. Apparently, they just dumped it here and left it. The grease catcher had been stored on top of it in a plastic bag that had pretty much disentigrated over the past two years. I gloved up, hosed it off and took a stainless steel scouring pad to it and got much of the flaky gunk off it. When I opened the top, I noticed that the grill had a slight covering of rust... and a ton of old spiderwebs. I cleaned the spiderwebs off and made a note to pick up a grill scraper the next time I was at the store. This was going to be an ongoing project. I also need to find a place to fill up the two propane tanks here at the house (and I'm pretty sure a nearby 76 Station can do that).
After starting a second load of dishes in the dishwasher, I left for the library. I didn't expect such a deluge of email, then I realized my mistake. I didn't go Saturday and they were closed Sunday and Monday. A lot of it was from Facebook and I felt some weird feelings connecting with friends and family I hadn't seen or heard from in over a decade. I was surprised to find one friend in particular as she had continually stated in high school that she disliked using computers and email. I guess times have changed (although she didn't know what LJ was,*headdesk*). After catching up on LJ, FB (really Farm Town), Twitter and email, I punched up my resume a bit, checked out a few household repair books then headed to subSpace. I had been feeling depressed this whole month and was actually good about *not* using food to make myself feel better. Unfortunately this led to me burning up a lot of time doing absolutely nothing (Literally, nothing; just sitting somewhere in silence and willing myself to not do anything.).
I got there a bit early and chatted with the few people that were already there. I didn't go in with any expectations; that tends to yield the best results. I really liked the format this time, unfortunately, the focus didn't get all the way around. When we ended, I felt like I continued to slip through the cracks.
A full night's sleep calmed me down, but now I just feel numb to everything.