Erase Me 2/10
Vince felt dizzy, but determined as he all but dragged Howard towards their room. The Northerner was hemming and hawing, but he wasn't saying no. When Howard didn't want to do something, he didn't hedge, he dug in his heels and became a stone wall.
"S'okay, Howard, I'll take care of everything, all right?"
Howard didn't look reassured. In fact, he looked so worried Vince couldn't help but stop and give him a kiss. Howard's little eyes were darting back and forth as Vince leaned in, but he was adorably eager and sloppy in his kiss. Vince knew if he continued the kiss a little longer, Howard would relax, but Vince was enjoying his awkwardness. He pulled back, leaving his hands on Howard's chest. Howard tried to smooth back his fine hair, but it just kept flopping back into his face. Vince was so full of love for his strange friend, he felt like a child dizzy on lemonade.
Once in their room, Howard nearly fell over trying to get undressed. Vince watched him fumble, enjoying the sexual slapstick, before stepping in.
"Just lie down, Howard. I'll take care of everything," he whispered, knowing Howard would never want anyone to overhear. Howard had an image of himself as a sophisticated man of the world, and Vince hated to tamper with that image. Howard was being held together by threads, and Vince didn't want to pull too hard and see him unravel. The love would always outweigh the anger and resentment.
Howard tried to be helpful, but mainly got in the way as Vince undressed him. Vince got an elbow and a knee to the nose, but he had Howard stripped and trying to subtly cover his genitals in a manner of minutes. Vince wanted to admire Howard in all his freckled, soft-tummied glory but the big man was already self-conscious. Howard would walk around, naked as a jay bird, complaining that Vince had shrunk his pants in the washer, but on the rare occasion that nothing was annoying him - he was actually quite shy. Vince chucked his own gear with uncharacteristic indifference so he could feel Howard's warm skin against his own as they snogged.
When they had moved into Naboo's, there had already been a king size bed on the floor of their room. It took up most of the room, and was far too large to fit through the door or window. It had been magicked in, and Naboo refused to magic it back out. He said it was time for Vince and Howard to learn how to sort things out on their own. Sometimes Vince thought Naboo was being clever and cunning by refusing to remove the bed. Other times he thought Naboo was just being a lazy bastard. Either way, Howard and Vince had been sharing a bed for two years. Two years of sleeping with their backs to one another, with separate blankets, until it just seemed normal.
For two years, they had been climbing into the same bed at night, and tonight - for the first time - Vince didn't feel like his heart was breaking.
Vince took it slow, keeping some room between their bodies as he explored Howard's mouth. It was strange and familiar at the same time.
"I love you," he whispered.
Howard laughed.
"You dick!" Vince growled, pretending to punch Howard's shoulder, "Now is not the time to be mocking me."
"But I do love you, 'oward! I were just finking 'bout sumptin else," Howard squawked, in a truly appalling imitation of Vince.
"That ain't even wot I said!" Vince protested, amping up the South London a tad. "I was just nervous, 'cause I thought we were going to die."
"I was glad you laughed," Howard said, suddenly serious, "If you hadn't laughed, I think I would have cried."
"Oh, Howard..."
"And I still didn't have the nerve..." Howard was shaking his head and looking ready to give himself a Chinese burn.
"S'all right, Howard. Worked out, dinnit? We're here and..."
"Naked."
"We're naked, and you look amazin'..."
"You need to eat," Howard scolded, "Look at your ribs, I'm afraid of breaking you."
"Don't flatter yourself," Vince snorted, "I can take whatever you've got in that Northern wheelbarrow of yours."
Howard waggled his eyebrows before tossing Vince flat on his back. It reminded Vince of the old days, when Howard had been a brooding bully instead of a jazz poet. What Howard remembered as the first time he and Vince met, was actually the second time. The first time they met, Vince had been checking his hair in a shop window as Howard and some of his mates walked by. Out of nowhere, Howard had clamped his oversized hand around Vince's face and shoved him to the ground. He didn't even look back to see the damage. That had started Vince's fascination with Howard Moon. Vince was used to being bullied for being small and strange and looking like a girl. He was a bully connoisseur. Howard was the only one who didn't seem to get anything out of being cruel. It was more like the opposite of a nicety. He pushed Vince because it was the socially appropriate thing to do to a fourteen-year-old boy (who looked like a 10-year-old girl).
But it was the new and improved, sensitive man of the naughties that was kissing Vince's neck - finding every ticklish spot and scolding him for being squirmy.
"It's that mustache of yours, it..." but there was no way to finish the sentence. It was a good thing Howard wasn't really paying attention. He had worked his way down to Vince's nipples. There was no reason to rush things, they'd both just gotten off, but Vince still wanted to move things along. He couldn't help but worry that something would interfere. There were so many complications in their lives. Their lives had been relatively normal before the zoo, and Vince wondered if things would go back to normal if they cut themselves off from Naboo and Bollo, but it was a moot point because that was never going to happen. Therefore, Vince had every reason to worry that an evil spirit might arrive at any moment and force them into a musical number. It had happened before.
Howard made sure to tickle each of Vince's ribs with his 'tache as he worked his way down. Vince had no idea how far down Howard was planning to go, and he decided to simply enjoy himself. It was impossible to tell Howard what to do, so there was no point in discussing it. Howard was as stubborn as a mule, unless you were a pretty girl. Then he was easier to mold than room-temperature butter.
Howard lingered at Vince's belly button. He smiled fondly as he ran his finger around Vince's navel.
"Oh, no," Vince teased, hearing the strain in his voice, "This is about to get well kinky."
Howard laughed and used his index finger to draw a line from Vince's navel to where it got a little confusing as to what was pubic hair and what was just regular belly hair.
"This area, here. This has caused me a lot of sleepless nights," Howard admitted, looking a bit wolfish. "You have no idea..."
"I have some idea," Vince whispered, but Howard let the comment pass. He licked his finger, before returning to tracing the outside of Vince's belly button. Vince felt like a horny teenager, every touch seemed so full of erotic potential. When Howard dipped his finger inside, Vince shuddered and Howard smirked. He gave Vince's belly a kiss, flicking his tongue into his navel before crawling back up the bed so they were again lying side by side. Vince couldn't pretend he wasn't a little disappointed, but he also couldn't pretend to be surprised. Until Howard spoke.
"I don't know how... I mean, I know how. I'm a man of the world and I've read a few pamphlets, but... I'm not sure exactly who should do what at this point."
Vince kissed Howard for being adorable and clueless and assured him he was in good hands. "You can just lie there. I'll do everything this time."
"There'll be a next time?" Howard asked in his strangled, 'I'm joking but not really, please don't embarrass me,' voice.
Vince jumped on top of Howard, straddling his waist, "I sure hope so."
Howard bit his lip, but his eyes were smiling, "Good. Just, you know, be gentle as they say."
Vince played up being dim, but he knew his wasn't the quickest mind in Dalston. It wasn't until he noticed the wary fish-eye Howard was giving the lubricant Vince produced from its hiding spot under a stack of Cheekbone magazines, that he started to put the pieces together.
He considered it for a moment. He could slick Howard up and give him the best two minutes of being told, "Don't move!" he'd ever had. It was a tempting thought, but there were things Vince knew about Howard that Howard did not know about himself. One of those things was that Howard did not bottom.
Except maybe this Howard did. The relieved sigh from Howard the moment Vince started preparing his own arse told him he was right. Howard had been willing, but far from eager. He seemed much happier about Vince being on top, if he wasn't actually planning to be the "top".
It was slow going. It had been over a year for Vince - longer since he'd used this position, and Howard wasn't exactly small. Howard's fingers were digging into Vince's hips, certainly leaving bruises, as he whispered, "Easy, Little Man. Easy."
It was more painful and arduous than he remembered, but the look of amazement on Howard's face made it more than worth the effort. He even loosened his death grip on Vince's hips and started to stroke his backside. Once Vince relaxed enough to start rolling his hips, those freakishly long fingers dug into his thighs like talons.
"Oh, I wish I paid more attention to sports," Howard joked, his voices raspy and strangled, "I could use some statistics to focus on."
"Think about... jazz," Vince moaned, as he started gaining speed. It was all coming back to him, how to relax, how to get just the right angle... It was like riding a bike, only much, much better, "That should cool your jets."
Howard moved his hands back to Vince's hips, "I'll think about Weather Report."
Vince laughed as Howard began thrusting up off the bed, but soon his eyes were crossing as Howard brushed his prostate again and again, and he knew he'd never make another joke about Jaco Pastrami again. Howard couldn't keep up the pace for long, soon he was holding Vince still and whistling "Birdland".
"If this is some elaborate plan to make me like jazz," Vince panted, "It is totally working."
Howard smiled as he ran his hands over Vince's chest. Vince tried to hold himself at a flattering angle. Howard was looking at him with that old, possessive look.
"This ringing any bells?" Vince asked, hopefully.
"Bells are ringing, fireworks are exploding. I think I just saw a train go through a tunnel..."
Vince forced a laugh, and bent down to give Howard a lingering kiss. He moved himself slowly up and down Howard's cock, enjoying every electrified nerve. When Howard was griping the sheets and moaning, Vince quickened his pace until he was riding him hard and fast.
"Fuck," Howard whimpered as he gripped Vince's arse with one hand. Vince was going to have a whole bevy of hard to explain bruises if Howard woke up with a case of amnesia, but it was worth it to watch Howard's whole body curl with his orgasm. Even his hair seemed to be standing on end.
Howard continued to shudder and swear, looking like he was receiving electro shock therapy. Vince gently rocked on his still throbbing cock, belatedly thinking a johnny might have been a good idea. He was a bit flattered it hadn't occurred to Howard, either.
Howard pried one eye open at a time.
"Little Man?"
"C'mon, Howard. Average Man, at least," Vince teased, not quite ready for whatever Howard had to say.
"Surprisingly well-endowed for someone who bunches his family jewels into spandex Man?"
"Yes?"
Howard ran his hand over Vince's stomach, again circling his belly-button, before taking Vince's erection in his hand, "That was indescribable."
"Even to a jazz poet?"
Howard fought a smile, "I might be able to scat about it..."
"That is one kink, I ain't into Howard!" Vince laughed, even as he rocked himself into Howard's hand. Howard was still hard, but there was a tension around his eyes when Vince moved that told him he was feeling painfully sensitive. Vince didn't stop. He pressed his lips to Howard's and thrust into his hand until he came.
xxx
Howard winced as Vince pulled their bodies apart. He felt raw and sore, and not just physically. Vince was smiling and joking, but he kept averting his eyes and hiding behind his hair. Vince could be so fearless, but he was surprisingly sensitive. It was hard to know what would upset him.
"Thank you, Vince," Howard said, stroking Vince's thin arm. He was always surprised by the dark hair there. Vince's body hair hadn't gotten the memo that he was bringing androgyny to the kids. "That was amazing."
Vince hid behind his hands, like a child, as he mumbled a response.
Howard tried to think of something to say that was worthy of the moment. He couldn't think of any relevant poetry. All the poetry about bumming tended to be too steeped in metaphor to be useful.
"I'm honored that you trusted me with something so special, and I hope I didn't let you down."
Vince's face tensed, and he turned his face towards the wall. Howard knew he needed to tread carefully, but it was important that Vince understand.
"I don't want this to be a one-time thing," Howard explained.
Vince gave a derisive snort. Something had clearly gone wrong, already.
"What just happened here was very special," Howard continued, beginning to feel nervous, "And I want it to be the start of something..."
"What about what just happened makes you think I haven't been fucked before?" Vince asked with a sneer. Howard was too shocked to respond. It had occurred to him that Vince might have been with a man, but he'd always seemed so innocent.
"I don't mind if you've -you've been with...well, other men..." Howard stammered, "I'm just trying to say..."
"I'm not a fucking thirty-year-old virgin, am I?" Vince snapped, "I've been bumming since I was sixteen."
Howard shrank a bit from the taunt. Vince had to be angry if he was using his real age. Howard wasn't exactly sure what had gone so wrong in his own life, but Vince never exactly seemed lucky in love, either.
"Did someone take advantage of you?" he asked, feeling sick at the idea, "Because that doesn't make you... this... any less special."
Vince screamed and covered his ears, before storming to the bathroom. Howard wrapped himself in a sheet and stood knocking at the door and trying to call to him over the noise of the shower, until Naboo and Bollo came home.
Naboo looked Howard up and down, "Logical conclusion, eh? That is well disgusting."