Fic: Eat the Brownie Part 2 NC-17
Title: Eat the Brownie or How Sheldon learned to stop worrying and love hippies
Author: Concupid
Fandom: TBBT
Characters: everyone/everyone
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: This is a response to a Kink Meme post for everyone/everyone http://community.livejournal.com/bbt_kink/407.html?thread=88983#t88983 , also brownies made by a hippy
Summary: Penny throws a kick ass party. Sheldon loves homemade brownies. Everyone ends up in bed with someone/some persons
Notes: I was pretty buzzed when I started this and thought it would be super fun to go backwards like Memento to get the "who done it?" feel suggested in the original prompt. Sober, I actually really like the structure but it is unnecessarily complicated for a PWP! Read if you dare! I'm trying to edit and tidy it up but it's probably still pretty rough. And I threw in Katie from the original pilot just for extra points!
9.
After Penny left, Howard and Raj sat on the bed, naked and sweaty. Sheldon was curled on his side, sound asleep.
"I can't believe we just did it with Penny. I can't look her in the eye but I looked her in the..."
"Raj, have some class! What we just shared was special. And hot. And oh so nasty."
"I can't believe we had sex together. We're still naked. How many brownies did you eat?"
"I had a fourth of one. I'll tell you, I'm no chemist but my hats off to the baker."
Raj scooted himself further on to the bed.
"Howard?"
"Yeah?"
"Are you still horny?"
"Um... Always!"
"Do you want to do it?"
"You mean with just you?"
"Yes."
"Okay."
Howard climbed on top of his delicious caramel friend. Raj's lips were thick and soft and his hands felt strong and demanding on his back. Howard pressed their groins together, grinding until they were both hard and then began to thrust. Sheldon groaned on the bed next to them but his eyes barely fluttered. Howard watched Sheldon sleep while he ground into his best friend. Sheldon's presence was both a turn on and a bucket of cold water.
10.
What Sheldon and Penny were doing was so much more intimate than what Howard and Raj had just, well, done.
Howard looked away, uncomfortable. Feeling like an intruder. Raj stared openly.
Penny whispered instructions and Sheldon followed them the best he could.
At least he wasn't yelling anymore.
In fact, he barely made a noise, just labored breathing as he made love (can you make love in that state?) to Penny.
Knowing his judgement was severely impaired, Howard still felt calm. He knew they would all be fine tomorrow. Penny would be embarassed but she'd yell and re-establish herself as the alpha male, despite her lack of a y chromosome. Raj would be philosophical. Sheldon would be mortified but the guy had a pretty limited emotional vocabulary. He was mortified when his dumplings were steamed, he'd be mortified to realize he'd participated, sort of, in group sex. There would be some new neurotic behavior to help him put his world back together. If a guy was going to spend a month obsessing over something, wasn't it better to be fussing over a drug fueled orgy than, say, having to do your laundry on a Sunday?
Howard would be fine. He was a resilient guy. But he was definitely going to call Bernadette. He'd had crazy hot sex. Now he wanted to try making love. He could wait as long as Bernadette wanted.
Penny's moans grew louder as she approached her climax. She kept talking to Sheldon, keeping him calm and on task. When he shuddered and collapsed on top of her, she stroked his short hair until the lanky physicist fell asleep, moments later. Raj helped drag 160 lbs of Texan off of Penny so she could get up and put on her clothes. And then she went accross the hall to, in her words kick everyone the fuck out of her apartment.
11.
As she expected, seeing Raj come sent Howard over the edge.
Holy crap on a cracker.
Sheldon was curled up in a ball, cocooned in his comforter.
While Raj and Howard removed their condoms, Penny tried to comfort Sheldon.
"Are you okay, Sweetie?"
"I feel strange."
"That is a perfectly normal reaction to the situation."
Sheldon looked around his room like he'd never seen it before.
"This is a perfect bedroom. Except for all the semen," Sheldon mused, "Ah! C-men is a homonym for semen. I can't believe no one else noticed that amusing coincidence!"
"We all noticed," interrupted Raj.
Sheldon furrowed his brow, "Sometimes I feel like the four of you are speaking a different language. A language that I am physically incapable of understanding."
Howard patted Sheldon's back, "We know. Believe it or not, it's a big part of why we like you."
"It is the biggest reason because, dude, you are not that playful and your java applet writing is mediocre at best," added Raj.
"Penny?"
"Yes, Sweetie?"
"Can we engage in coitus again?"
Penny burrowed herself into Sheldon's comforter and kissed him deeply. She considered kicking Raj and Howard out but maybe they needed to be there. They needed to bring things full circle. Sheldon seemed unsure how to proceed. He hadn't exactly initiated his previous sexual experiences.
Penny whispered in his ear that she wanted his hand between her legs. Sheldon's long fingers were gentle but not timid. He was an apt pupil. It was only when he entered her that he looked a little lost.
"I have no idea what's going on in that beautiful mind, Sheldon, but... don't think. Just move."
Sheldon moved.
"Thank you, Penny."
"You don't have to thank me for sex."
"I meant thank you for being my friend."
Penny felt a stab in her heart. Sheldon really loved her. Not like Leonard loved her. Not like Sheldon loved Leonard but it was love none the less. She needed to get Leonard over here. He knew Sheldon better than anyone, he'd know how to make it all okay. Leonard specialized in working things out so everyone, except for Leonard, was happy. For now, she guided Sheldon through some slow intense love-making. She left hickeys on his pale neck and shoulder. She wanted proof.
12.
Penny worked Raj with her mouth and hand and waited for Howard to take her from behind. Sheldon was watching with a detached interest. More Louis Leakey than Ron Jeremy.
There Leonard, I'm getting ready to fuck two guys while another watches and I'm thinking about the anthropologist you were named after. Don't tell me I don't care about you.
Howard was entering her. His cock was already twitching. This wasn't going to last long. She took Raj deep into her throat and enjoyed his strangled moan. She'd fantasized about that. Trying to get a noise out of Raj. Raj caressed one of her breasts while Howard cupped the other. Howard began to slowly pump his cock into her. Soon his thrusts sped up, the force pushing her into Raj's cock. Raj's sensual mouth was slack as he focused on the sensation of Penny. Penny loved that she could make this genius look like any other mouth breather she had dated.
Howard's thrusts were becoming ragged and she wasn't read to come yet. She needed to help things along...
Sheldon didn't resist as she put his hand between her legs, she showed him just how to work her clit. He looked absurdly serious as he continued the movement on his own. Howard had slowed down, apparently to watch.
Howard pulled out of Penny.
"Wolowitz, you better have a damn good reason to leave me hanging..." she growled. Sheldon was really a good student. She could already feel her orgasm building...
Howard put his hand on Sheldon's chin and tilted his face for a chaste, but oddly romantic, kiss.
Sheldon's fingers only stopped for a moment. Penny felt a tiny orgasmic shudder. Almost there.
Howard scooted awkwardly towards Raj and pulled him in for a not in the least bit chaste kiss. Penny thought she saw tongue. She let go of Raj's dick and watched as the two men explored each other's mouths. Wow.
"That is so fucking hot," she whispered.
Howard and Raj pulled apart, suddenly embarassed. Howard scrambled back into position. Penny was already back to sucking Raj's cock and her moan when Howard re-entered her almost did in her Indian friend. Not yet, Raj. She knew that once Howard saw Raj come, it would be all over.
The first night she met her boys, she imagined taking on all four of them. It had been a silly fantasy where her sexual prowess could turn geeks into studs. She never imagined this. That they would come together... come together! and share this kind of intamacy. That she would want to make them feel as good as they were making her....
"Oh fuck," she mumbled into Raj's cock. That was it for Raj. When she felt that twitch in his dick, she ground herself into Sheldon's hand and came.
13.
Penny got up on her knees, never taking her mouth off of Raj's cock.
Howard fumbled on the condom and got behind that vanilla scented goddess. He was going to have sex with Penny.
He caressed her between her legs and she moaned.
Raj moaned.
Sheldon yelled, "Why are you all in my room!"
Sheldon looked surprised.
"Go back to sleep, Sheldon!" Howard snapped.
Sheldon frowned but put his head back on the pillow.
Now back to that beautifully toned backside. He slid two fingers inside her warm and wet opening. Penny moaned louder.
So did Raj.
"Don't start with me, Sheldon!"
Sheldon closed his mouth.
Now to make sweet love to Penny.
"Who am I kidding, I can't do this. Raj, we need to leave."
Raj gave a very different, anguished moan when Penny let go of his erection and turned to Howard.
"Are you kidding me? You don't want to do this?" the blonde demanded.
"Oh believe me, I would do you on a plate of bacon in front of my mother and rabbi if you were sober..."
"I haven't had anything to drink in hours. Not since I found out what happened to Sheldon..."
"What happened to me! Why is everyone in my room?" the Texan demanded.
"And I didn't touch a brownie! Last time I had one of Starla's brownies I ended up on youtube as 'hot chick fights cougar from the future'".
"You're sober? Well, soberish? And you still want to..."
Penny looked Howard square in the eye.
"This is a one time thing. It's something I've wanted to try but only with two guys I can trust."
Howard hugged Penny and then tossed her back on the bed and went down on her while she returned to blowing a relieved Raj.
14.
"Don't be shy, boys, we're all friends here," enticed Penny.
Sheldon grabbed his phone and sent a text to Leonard. He wrote "Raj and Howard are goink to have coitus in my room. Make then stop. Penny's hear. PEPLE ARENT ALLOWED IN MY ROOOM?" His fingers felt absurdly large and he had trouble hitting the correct keys. Why had he consumed that alcohol? Why did have sex with that strange woman? Why was Penny inviting Raj and Howard to engage in sexual congress in his bedroom? Why was he SOOOO hungry?
And where was Leonard?
Howard and Raj were kissing again. Penny took her top off. Raj and Howard admired her exposed breasts until Penny prompted them to return to "getting her off".
Penny appeared to be using the promise of sex to entice her friends into more homosexual behavior.
But to what end?
Because Penny found their behavior arouusing.
Nailed it!
Sheldon asked Penny just to be sure. His voice seemed unnaturally loud. She confirmed his theory.
"I'm just lit up enough to be totally comfortable with all of this," interjected Raj, pointing to Howard, Penny and himself, "But Sheldon watching and yelling is a little weird. Can we do this somewhere else?"
Sheldon felt mildly offended. It was his room, afterall.
"Feel free to leave! But bring me back some more food. I already finished all the good cereal and I'm running out of cookies."
"We should probably keep an eye on him," sighed Raj, "Why isn't Leonard picking up his phone?"
"I'm believe he's busy engaging in some form of carnal activity with Katie and Alicia," supplied Sheldon.
"Dude! Leonard is not hitting it with two girls at the same time!" Raj looked skyward, "Yes you can, brother. Yes you can. Fuck it, let's just do this."
Raj started stripping and Penny followed. Soon Howard was the last clothed person in the room. It was the North Pole all over again.
"Howard, faint heart n'er won fair maid," Sheldon stage whispered.
Howard glared but he began to take his clothes off as well.
Sheldon could hear the sound of bed springs from upstairs. What was it about Sheldon's room that incited people to threesomes? Sheldon wondered if he was emitting some kind of strange hormone that elicited illicit behaviors in others.
He grabbed his cell phone and typed, "Leonard. Come quick and bring a biohazard suit. I thimk I'm contagiosu."
Penny began to perform fellatio on Raj. Sheldon decided to try and squeeze in a nap until Leonard showed up.
15.
Penny burst into Sheldon's room without knocking.
"Have you seen Kurt?"
"Not yet, but I'm sure he'll be along. Apparently my bedroom has become Grand Central Station."
Sheldon's response is derisive and typical. However, he is also naked and eating cookies (in bed!) from a Batman cookie jar. There's a used condom on the floor. Leonard was supposed to run interference before Sheldon hooked up with some skank...
"What's a skank? Don't look at me like that, you're talking out loud. Is a skank a synonym for whore? Because Leonard seemed fairly certain..."
"Please stop talking, Sweetie. Kurt was storming around threatening to come after you and Leonard... I don't know where he went."
Sheldon shoved two cookies in his mouth at the same time.
"I'm so hungry!" he announced, cookie bits flying with each word.
Maybe Kurt had just left maybe it would be...
Howard and Raj stumbled in through the door, kissing passionately.
"PEOPLE ARE NOT ALLOWED IN MY ROOM!"
Howard and Raj jumped apart.
Penny was shocked. Skinny sleazy Howard and certifiably weird Raj kissing. Why was it so hot?
16.
"Hey, faggots, where are your nerd friends?"
Kurt towered over Raj and Howard. Raj was surprised to hear the laugh come out of his throat.
"Something funny, Apu?"
"Just that my nerdy friends are banging every woman you can't!"
Kurt stopped mid-lunge when he saw Penny.
"I swear to God, Kurt. I will call the cops and you'll go back to jail!"
Kurt stormed out of the apartment. Penny watched him leave and then ran accross the hall to let herself into her neighbor's apartment.
"She didn't lock the door behind her. Gigantor is going to come back and kill them all," mused Howard.
It took them several minutes, in their impaired state, to realize they could only lock the dead bolt without a key if they were inside the apartment.
"I need to use the potty, then we'll figure this out."
Raj sprinted down the hall. The bathroom looked totally different. When did Leonard and Sheldon repaint the bathroom? He had unzipped his pants before he realized he was about to pee in Leonard's drawer.
He was in a bedroom. Hence the bed.
He found and used the bathroom, correctly he hoped. Perhaps the brownie had packed more of a whallop than he'd expected. Even during the great cookie debacle, he hadn't been this out of it. It made him nervous to realize just out of control he was becoming. He suddenly didn't want to be alone. He ran to Howard and hugged him tightly. His wiry friend squirmed in his arms so Raj held tighter.
"What's going on, Raj?"
He kissed Howard's hair and his forehead. He seemed so nervous and unsure. Raj rained kisses all over his face until Howard kissed him back. On the lips. He guided them back to what he thought was Leonard's bedroom. He hopped it wouldn't smell like pee.
17.
Katie was pleasantly surprised when she unzipped Sheldon's pants and pulled out a thick cock.
"Why are you a physicist with a cock like this?"
Sheldon looked at Leonard, "Was that rhetorical and, follow up question, was that sarcastic?"
"It's just dirty talk, Sheldon. Now pretend I'm not here," Leonard whispered from the floor.
Sheldon stopped talking when Katie started to stroke his erection. He stopped talking, thinking and (briefly) breathing.
Leonard was chewing his thumbnail while he watched. She fucking hated Leonard and his privledged life and brilliant parents. When they yanked his frizzy head out of his mom, the doctor slapped his ass and said, "It's a genius!" Not like her and her boy, Sheldon. Sheldon was a hick who grew up in a trailer, building lasers in the shed and trying not to get whupped by his drunken dad. This was going to be the first dick she sucked that actually deserved it.
When she lowered herself to take Sheldon's head in her mouth, both men moaned. Nice.
Even shit faced and still smelling like another woman's pussy, Sheldon had a hair trigger. She was going to have to be careful if she wanted to make it good for Sheldon and torture for Leonard. She teased them both with little licks and strokes. When she put her hand between her legs, Leonard instructed Sheldon to take over. Fucking know-it-all.
She slid Sheldon's cock past her lips and sucked gently. His slid a finger inside her. She slid her lips all the way down, his cock twitched dangerously and Leonard's eyes almost fell out of his head. Fuck it.
She used her mouth to put the condom on Sheldon and lowered herself onto his shaft. He gripped her hips and looked at Leonard.
"Solve for pi," whispered the shorter brainiac.
Sheldon looked confused but at "6433" Katie was able to start riding him. She ground herself onto that delightful dick while blues eyes watched her in amazement. And a deep voice muttered a stream of meaningless numbers.
Leonard was watching them. Jealous for sure, but of her or Sheldon?
"Why don't you play with Shel's ass while I fuck him?"
Sheldon let out a distressed moan.
"Do you want Leonard to play with you, cutie? Touch you?"
Sheldon screwed his eyes shut.
"Maybe he can fuck you when I'm done. When you are all relaxed from coming inside of me."
"Don't talk," Sheldon growled.
Katie rode him hard until she came. Whenever he seemed ready to lose it, she played with his ass. He was just freaked out enough to hold off his orgasm but he never got any less hard.
She couldn't help but smile at Leonard, all curled up, practically fetal. Unable to deal with his friend's sexuality. Unable to look away.
When she let Sheldon come, he was beautiful. His red-faced grimace relaxed into a crooked smile. His blue eyes shyly darting around and finally settling on Leonard. Leonard gave him a thumbs up and started to leave.
"Wait, Leonard," Katie called.
Leonard looked nervous. More like paranoid.
"You know that bitch, Alicia, that Penny hates?"
Leonard looked to the ceiling.
"Let's go pay her a visit."
Leonard looked dubious but he followed and left Sheldon sound asleep, still smiling.