my first thoughts when seeing this: 19k?? of junhwan?/ character death?? TIME TRAVEL??
Jinhwan tugs the collar of his coat- no, Junhwe’s coat- up over the lower half of his face, and waits. shARInG cLOThES?? tiny jinhwan in big junhwe's jacket?? mY WEAKNESS
Junhwe leans in towards the Other One- a kiss?- but is batted away. There’s a brief flash of disappointment across Junhwe’s face, and Jinhwan’s heart sinks a little in his chest. is this [whispers] infidelity jK jk Himself. Kim Jinhwan. i waSNT SEEING THIS PLOT TWIST??
An entire world that Jinhwan is not only not a part of, but one he could have been a part of, had he not chosen otherwise. this sadness -_____- why....
Eventually, the cold wins over. Jinhwan zips Junhwe’s coat all the way up to his chin and resumes walking in moody silence. NO THIS IS SO CUTE?? JINHWAN ZIPPING UP JUNHWE?? TAKING CARE OF HIM (but not like a mom bc mom!jinhwan is not smth we need) [clutches heart]
He pushes Junhwe away when Junhwe leans in for a kiss. It’s instinctive, not entirely something he’d meant to do, but he sees the momentary surprise before Junhwe's face closes off. Jinhwan immediately feels bad, apology on his tongue- but Junhwe is already moving to board the train. nO????
It’s unusual, considering the time of the day. The only ones who ever call at this time are Junhwe (who calls whenever he wants), Jinhwan’s mother (who never did manage to grow accustomed to his working hours), and Bobby (who is prone to irregular bouts of sentimentality, and partial to taking early lunch breaks). All three of their numbers are at the top of Jinhwan’s contact list. Jinhwan hits the ‘accept’ button and raises the phone to his ear. aw this is so cute!! junhwe calling whenever he wants u___u
Jinhwan had done so little, comparatively. It’s funny, because Junhwe’s apparent emotional ineptitude had always been the thing people saw as a potential roadblock to their relationship, when really Junhwe is as easy to read as a book, if you know what to look for. Jinhwan isn’t so sure the reverse applies. He’d let his own baggage weigh them both down, hadn’t said some of the things he should have. i aM UPSET?? junhwe?/ died?? nO?? whAT IS THIS I MUST CONTINUE READING??
On the third day, Jinhwan rips through the wires connecting the television to the wall. Bobby is alarmed and Hanbin can no longer watch late night drama re-runs, but at least Jinhwan’s head stops hurting after that. REI I AM SO UPSET NO I CANT HANDLE THIS JINHWAN ANGST
Every moment Jinhwan is reading, it’s as if Junhwe is still alive. Like he exists in a time frame not confined to the past.The first step towards acceptance is acknowledging that the given situation isn’t a bad dream. Soon after Jinhwan stops believing Junhwe will reappear, however, Jinhwan stops believing that things will get better at all. Everything about the reality he’s living is wrong. There are too many things Jinhwan wishes he could change. a very disapproving face should be inserted here!! just rip out my heart already!!
“Hi,” Junhwe mumbles, and really, he’d probably be upset if he knew how cute he looked like that. [small muffled sobbing here]
Junhwe is quick to pick up on the generosity. “There are other ways you could congratulate me,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. whAT a laME nerd honestly goo junhwe. this scene was so cute tho!! junhwe you little shit purposely hugging jinhwan to get sweaty then taking a shower wOW whAT A LOSER
A wave of something sweeps through Jinhwan, starting from the pit of his stomach- something that feels a lot like guilt. He’d grown accustomed to avoiding questions from colleagues about his personal life; he’d probably mentioned Junhwe only once or twice as the flatmate he’d known since university. It wasn’t that he was ashamed of admitting to their relationship, or anything. i am Upset this is Terrible i can just see junhwe with sMILE AND ALL telling everyone about his cute little boyfriend and jinhwan why i trusted you
“No, I’ve changed my mind, I’m going to ask Chanwoo to live with me instead,” Jinhwan says. “Don’t be ridiculous. Of course I’m sure.” wouldnt that have been terribly tragic now
“No,” Yunhyeong says. “I’m here to save you.” okay wow i had to back trail for a bit. falling out between yunhyeong and junhwe?? yunhyeONG IS A TIME TRAVELLER TOO?? SAVING JINHWAN?? THIS SUSPENSE (also lmao at yunhyeong playing nice guy to his advantage to get into the buildling, what an angel)
And it’s that easy. Yunhyeong’s hesitation before he answers is palpable. “We never tested this- the time jumping. At least, I never did. I couldn’t tell you what would happen, not for sure.” ;_____; why
“How will we be sure he loooves you?” this is so cute!! double b checking to make sure junhwe is "good" for jinhwan (and lmao junhwe who cant swim yet would still go to save jinhwan whAT A CUTIE, but not really he's just a lame loser in love) and jUNHWE HIDING IN THE BATHROOM STALL AND JINHWAN GOING TO GET HIM TOO HES SO LAME
He’d caused the accident THIS PLOT TWIST NONTHIS PARADOX I AM SCREAMING RIGHT NOW THIS IS TERRIBLE
“Don’t… Cry,” Junhwe says, so awkwardly endearing that it only makes Jinhwan cry harder. emotionally stunted junhwe ;___; this is sO UPSETTING
When Junhwe smiles at him, it’s just like the very first time they met. “I know,” he says. “I love you, too.” scREAMS YOU CANT DO THIS TO ME REI
The boy looks to be a student in his first or second year, with a style Bobby would probably call “hip-hop” and Hanbin would probably call “boring”. He’s tall, in an annoyingly attractive way, with slightly more than half a head on Jinhwan. All traces of irritation on the boy’s face seems to vanish the instant Jinhwan makes eye contact with him. hah....
OH MY GOD SO MY FEELINGS ON THIS FIC: time traVEL I KNEW SMTH TRAGIC WOULD HAPPEN. i think i ended up half tense and half sobbing and half 'aw'ing during this fic. i loved the double b interspersed throughout trying to make sure junhwe is "right" for jinhwan. aND junhwan's entire relationship?? iD love to know this terribly cute sounding backstory of junhwe bumping into jinhwan and spilling coffee on him. awkward bumbling junhwe ftw uwu
also i wasn't expecting this ending at all!! jinhwan going back in time to save junhwe which causes the accident (muffled crying here) thIS WAS SO PAINFUL?? the fact that jinhwan trying to save junhwe from himself?? and not to mention the yunhyeong/donghyuk where yunhyeong is being a sweet angelic friend and if he can't save his two friends, he can try to save at least one right?? thEN THERE WAS THE JUNHWAN DYING SCENE... ultimate pain right there ;_____;
you had such a good take on their dynamics too?? honestly there isn't anything junhwe wouldn't do for jinhwan?? but then jinhwan in this fic he had such conflicting feelings and i feel like the fact that he restricted himself from doing some things was what tormented him the most in the end u____u
im fairly certain...that there was more that i wanted to say...about this terribly heartwrenching fic but reI HONESTLY THANK YOU SO MUCH THIS WAS SUCH A GREAT FIC and it was so heartbreaking and i cant say cute because this junhwan death was not cute.
ALICE, THIS COMMENT. THESE COMMENTS. I love reading your thought process so much you are so cute. And like I said before, as long as you enjoyed this then I'm happy, that's all that matters ;__;
my first thoughts when seeing this: 19k?? of junhwan?/ character death?? TIME TRAVEL?? Remember that brief period of time in which you kept trying to make me envision angsty junhwan?? And said someone should write angsty junhwan/junhwan longfic?? I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY NOW. Omg, all that confusion is all too familiar it's still what I think when I look at this fic, like how in the world did I even finish it?? (Answer: I had to get it done for you. This fic would never have existed otherwise.) i think i ended up half tense and half sobbing and half 'aw'ing during this fic I'm so glad I managed to move you (all three halves of you)!! And that you thought it was "great" despite being tragic!
jinhwan in this fic he had such conflicting feelings and i feel like the fact that he restricted himself from doing some things was what tormented him the most in the end You summed it up wonderfully, like to begin with, jinhwan was never quite as assured as junhwe was when it came to their relationship. Junhwe obviously meant a lot to jinhwan -- jinhwan dragged himself out of bed every morning after only a few hours of sleep just to see him off to work -- but of course that was pretty much an obvious 'gesture of love' only from junhwe's perspective. Junhwe never doubted jinhwan!! But jinhwan doubted himself. Hence all the regret u__u
I find it so interesting that you described yunhyeong as angelic, because he struck me as the most questionable character while writing! Though I think a lot of it stemmed from the fact that even though he wanted to save junhwe, once he knew how the time travel worked he knew he couldn't, and so it was almost as if he didn't try as hard as he might have otherwise. Same story with yunhyeong saving donghyuk, but in reverse -- yunhyeong knew it was supposed to happen, so he did it. Like a self-fulfilling prophecy, in a way. And I guess that all had more to do with the circumstances of the time travel than yunhyeong's character/personality. What point was I trying to get at again? Yunhyeong was basically conning his way around, how is that angelic!!
And since you mentioned chanwoo -- I was this close to writing an entire scene with him (eager university freshman who lands himself with a roommate who, disappointingly, shows no interest whatsoever in interacting with him or being friendly at all, and then one day chanwoo meets this apathetic roommate's boyfriend who's small and adorable and nice, and his roommate is all smiley and in a good mood around him, and chanwoo is BAFFLED), but alas that scene went to bobby and hanbin instead. Probably a good thing?? Idk.
I have to say I'm proud to have achieved your Not Cute stamp of approval, this rare honour!! Thank you again for your super lovely comment(s) and enjoyment <3 Since this is your birthday fic I don't want to say anything like 'anticipating some form of junhwan fic from you in future please and thank you' but......you know what to do!!!
cRIES rei no you're cuter!! but i was actually commenting on this and reading it simultaneously, so these comments and thoughts were reAL LIFE reactions.
I CANT BELIEVE YOU. I CANT EVEN GET MAD BC I REALLY DID SAY THAT AND I WAS ASKING FOR IT TBH. i love angsty junhwan but i Hate angsty junhwan rei this fic makes me feel sO CONFLICTED over that.
its just so upsetting that jinhwan never really got closure of sorts?? bc he probably would have time traveled if he didn't doubt himself and i guess then cause the initial explosion?? idk im so bad when it comes out to figuring out paradoxes. but its just so ;___; that junhwe never doubted jinhwan and i just TT_TT
i think the reason i find him angelic (in this fic of course, he's angelic all the time irl!!) is bc he goes back in time even tho he doesn't have to i guess you can say?? he knows the repercussions bc he helped develop the research. i mean... conning can be kinda angelic?? ig?? somewhat... this makes me wonder if yunhyeong had tried harder then maybe they could have gotten out of the paradox?? or maybe it would have just made it worse or the entire situation was inevitable.
oH MY GOD chanwoo and junhwe rooming together how would that evEN WORK. then one day chanwoo meets this apathetic roommate's boyfriend who's small and adorable and nice, and his roommate is all smiley and in a good mood around him, and chanwoo is BAFFLED such an accurate description honestly!! i bet all of junhwe's coworkers are completely baffled by the amount he talks about jinhwan too lmao
[sends you lots of love and kisses] i need to owe up to junhwan and actually write for them... but yes please do anticipate it'll come.. eventually...
I would say jinhwan did get his closure! Junhwe's 'I know, I love you too' was proof that he understood jinhwan (what he was trying to convey in that moment + the fact that junhwe mattered so much to jinhwan) even when jinhwan doubted himself. So no need to be sad about that?? Conning required yunhyeong to act angelic, I suppose u__u You're right though, going back was his choice, partly out of curiosity and because he'd been so involved in the research, but he clearly knew the potential danger and still tried to save jinhwan (and possibly junhwe).
this makes me wonder if yunhyeong had tried harder then maybe they could have gotten out of the paradox?? or maybe it would have just made it worse or the entire situation was inevitable One thing about the consistency principle that fascinates me is that there are no 'what if's -- the paradox is contingent on there being no possibility of an alternative sequence of events. So technically, yunhyeong couldn't have done anything to change the outcome, and if he'd done something differently, it would only have helped create the the original outcome. I DON'T KNOW IF I'M MAKING SENSE, for someone who has very little knowledge about physics I have a lot to say about theories of time travel u__u
i bet all of junhwe's coworkers are completely baffled by the amount he talks about jinhwan too lmao HAHA YES. Which is why donghyuk recognises jinhwan immediately (since junhwe talks about jinhwan so much donghyuk demands to see photos) and is like. YOU. YOU ARE JINHWAN. THE JINHWAN.
[sends you love and kisses back] I WILL BE ANTICIPATING THIS 'EVENTUALLY' <3
Jinhwan tugs the collar of his coat- no, Junhwe’s coat- up over the lower half of his face, and waits. shARInG cLOThES?? tiny jinhwan in big junhwe's jacket?? mY WEAKNESS
Junhwe leans in towards the Other One- a kiss?- but is batted away. There’s a brief flash of disappointment across Junhwe’s face, and Jinhwan’s heart sinks a little in his chest. is this [whispers] infidelity jK jk Himself. Kim Jinhwan. i waSNT SEEING THIS PLOT TWIST??
An entire world that Jinhwan is not only not a part of, but one he could have been a part of, had he not chosen otherwise. this sadness -_____- why....
Eventually, the cold wins over. Jinhwan zips Junhwe’s coat all the way up to his chin and resumes walking in moody silence. NO THIS IS SO CUTE?? JINHWAN ZIPPING UP JUNHWE?? TAKING CARE OF HIM (but not like a mom bc mom!jinhwan is not smth we need) [clutches heart]
He pushes Junhwe away when Junhwe leans in for a kiss. It’s instinctive, not entirely something he’d meant to do, but he sees the momentary surprise before Junhwe's face closes off. Jinhwan immediately feels bad, apology on his tongue- but Junhwe is already moving to board the train. nO????
It’s unusual, considering the time of the day. The only ones who ever call at this time are Junhwe (who calls whenever he wants), Jinhwan’s mother (who never did manage to grow accustomed to his working hours), and Bobby (who is prone to irregular bouts of sentimentality, and partial to taking early lunch breaks). All three of their numbers are at the top of Jinhwan’s contact list. Jinhwan hits the ‘accept’ button and raises the phone to his ear. aw this is so cute!! junhwe calling whenever he wants u___u
Jinhwan had done so little, comparatively. It’s funny, because Junhwe’s apparent emotional ineptitude had always been the thing people saw as a potential roadblock to their relationship, when really Junhwe is as easy to read as a book, if you know what to look for. Jinhwan isn’t so sure the reverse applies. He’d let his own baggage weigh them both down, hadn’t said some of the things he should have. i aM UPSET?? junhwe?/ died?? nO?? whAT IS THIS I MUST CONTINUE READING??
On the third day, Jinhwan rips through the wires connecting the television to the wall. Bobby is alarmed and Hanbin can no longer watch late night drama re-runs, but at least Jinhwan’s head stops hurting after that. REI I AM SO UPSET NO I CANT HANDLE THIS JINHWAN ANGST
Every moment Jinhwan is reading, it’s as if Junhwe is still alive. Like he exists in a time frame not confined to the past.The first step towards acceptance is acknowledging that the given situation isn’t a bad dream. Soon after Jinhwan stops believing Junhwe will reappear, however, Jinhwan stops believing that things will get better at all. Everything about the reality he’s living is wrong. There are too many things Jinhwan wishes he could change. a very disapproving face should be inserted here!! just rip out my heart already!!
“Hi,” Junhwe mumbles, and really, he’d probably be upset if he knew how cute he looked like that. [small muffled sobbing here]
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A wave of something sweeps through Jinhwan, starting from the pit of his stomach- something that feels a lot like guilt. He’d grown accustomed to avoiding questions from colleagues about his personal life; he’d probably mentioned Junhwe only once or twice as the flatmate he’d known since university. It wasn’t that he was ashamed of admitting to their relationship, or anything. i am Upset this is Terrible i can just see junhwe with sMILE AND ALL telling everyone about his cute little boyfriend and jinhwan why i trusted you
“No, I’ve changed my mind, I’m going to ask Chanwoo to live with me instead,” Jinhwan says. “Don’t be ridiculous. Of course I’m sure.” wouldnt that have been terribly tragic now
“No,” Yunhyeong says. “I’m here to save you.” okay wow i had to back trail for a bit. falling out between yunhyeong and junhwe?? yunhyeONG IS A TIME TRAVELLER TOO?? SAVING JINHWAN?? THIS SUSPENSE (also lmao at yunhyeong playing nice guy to his advantage to get into the buildling, what an angel)
And it’s that easy. Yunhyeong’s hesitation before he answers is palpable. “We never tested this- the time jumping. At least, I never did. I couldn’t tell you what would happen, not for sure.” ;_____; why
“How will we be sure he loooves you?” this is so cute!! double b checking to make sure junhwe is "good" for jinhwan (and lmao junhwe who cant swim yet would still go to save jinhwan whAT A CUTIE, but not really he's just a lame loser in love) and jUNHWE HIDING IN THE BATHROOM STALL AND JINHWAN GOING TO GET HIM TOO HES SO LAME
He’d caused the accident THIS PLOT TWIST NONTHIS PARADOX I AM SCREAMING RIGHT NOW THIS IS TERRIBLE
“Don’t… Cry,” Junhwe says, so awkwardly endearing that it only makes Jinhwan cry harder. emotionally stunted junhwe ;___; this is sO UPSETTING
When Junhwe smiles at him, it’s just like the very first time they met. “I know,” he says. “I love you, too.” scREAMS YOU CANT DO THIS TO ME REI
The boy looks to be a student in his first or second year, with a style Bobby would probably call “hip-hop” and Hanbin would probably call “boring”. He’s tall, in an annoyingly attractive way, with slightly more than half a head on Jinhwan. All traces of irritation on the boy’s face seems to vanish the instant Jinhwan makes eye contact with him. hah....
OH MY GOD SO MY FEELINGS ON THIS FIC:
time traVEL I KNEW SMTH TRAGIC WOULD HAPPEN. i think i ended up half tense and half sobbing and half 'aw'ing during this fic. i loved the double b interspersed throughout trying to make sure junhwe is "right" for jinhwan. aND junhwan's entire relationship?? iD love to know this terribly cute sounding backstory of junhwe bumping into jinhwan and spilling coffee on him. awkward bumbling junhwe ftw uwu
also i wasn't expecting this ending at all!! jinhwan going back in time to save junhwe which causes the accident (muffled crying here) thIS WAS SO PAINFUL?? the fact that jinhwan trying to save junhwe from himself?? and not to mention the yunhyeong/donghyuk where yunhyeong is being a sweet angelic friend and if he can't save his two friends, he can try to save at least one right?? thEN THERE WAS THE JUNHWAN DYING SCENE... ultimate pain right there ;_____;
you had such a good take on their dynamics too?? honestly there isn't anything junhwe wouldn't do for jinhwan?? but then jinhwan in this fic he had such conflicting feelings and i feel like the fact that he restricted himself from doing some things was what tormented him the most in the end u____u
im fairly certain...that there was more that i wanted to say...about this terribly heartwrenching fic but reI HONESTLY THANK YOU SO MUCH THIS WAS SUCH A GREAT FIC and it was so heartbreaking and i cant say cute because this junhwan death was not cute.
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my first thoughts when seeing this: 19k?? of junhwan?/ character death?? TIME TRAVEL?? Remember that brief period of time in which you kept trying to make me envision angsty junhwan?? And said someone should write angsty junhwan/junhwan longfic?? I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY NOW. Omg, all that confusion is all too familiar it's still what I think when I look at this fic, like how in the world did I even finish it?? (Answer: I had to get it done for you. This fic would never have existed otherwise.) i think i ended up half tense and half sobbing and half 'aw'ing during this fic I'm so glad I managed to move you (all three halves of you)!! And that you thought it was "great" despite being tragic!
jinhwan in this fic he had such conflicting feelings and i feel like the fact that he restricted himself from doing some things was what tormented him the most in the end You summed it up wonderfully, like to begin with, jinhwan was never quite as assured as junhwe was when it came to their relationship. Junhwe obviously meant a lot to jinhwan -- jinhwan dragged himself out of bed every morning after only a few hours of sleep just to see him off to work -- but of course that was pretty much an obvious 'gesture of love' only from junhwe's perspective. Junhwe never doubted jinhwan!! But jinhwan doubted himself. Hence all the regret u__u
I find it so interesting that you described yunhyeong as angelic, because he struck me as the most questionable character while writing! Though I think a lot of it stemmed from the fact that even though he wanted to save junhwe, once he knew how the time travel worked he knew he couldn't, and so it was almost as if he didn't try as hard as he might have otherwise. Same story with yunhyeong saving donghyuk, but in reverse -- yunhyeong knew it was supposed to happen, so he did it. Like a self-fulfilling prophecy, in a way. And I guess that all had more to do with the circumstances of the time travel than yunhyeong's character/personality. What point was I trying to get at again? Yunhyeong was basically conning his way around, how is that angelic!!
And since you mentioned chanwoo -- I was this close to writing an entire scene with him (eager university freshman who lands himself with a roommate who, disappointingly, shows no interest whatsoever in interacting with him or being friendly at all, and then one day chanwoo meets this apathetic roommate's boyfriend who's small and adorable and nice, and his roommate is all smiley and in a good mood around him, and chanwoo is BAFFLED), but alas that scene went to bobby and hanbin instead. Probably a good thing?? Idk.
I have to say I'm proud to have achieved your Not Cute stamp of approval, this rare honour!! Thank you again for your super lovely comment(s) and enjoyment <3 Since this is your birthday fic I don't want to say anything like 'anticipating some form of junhwan fic from you in future please and thank you' but......you know what to do!!!
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I CANT BELIEVE YOU. I CANT EVEN GET MAD BC I REALLY DID SAY THAT AND I WAS ASKING FOR IT TBH. i love angsty junhwan but i Hate angsty junhwan rei this fic makes me feel sO CONFLICTED over that.
its just so upsetting that jinhwan never really got closure of sorts?? bc he probably would have time traveled if he didn't doubt himself and i guess then cause the initial explosion?? idk im so bad when it comes out to figuring out paradoxes. but its just so ;___; that junhwe never doubted jinhwan and i just TT_TT
i think the reason i find him angelic (in this fic of course, he's angelic all the time irl!!) is bc he goes back in time even tho he doesn't have to i guess you can say?? he knows the repercussions bc he helped develop the research. i mean... conning can be kinda angelic?? ig?? somewhat... this makes me wonder if yunhyeong had tried harder then maybe they could have gotten out of the paradox?? or maybe it would have just made it worse or the entire situation was inevitable.
oH MY GOD chanwoo and junhwe rooming together how would that evEN WORK. then one day chanwoo meets this apathetic roommate's boyfriend who's small and adorable and nice, and his roommate is all smiley and in a good mood around him, and chanwoo is BAFFLED such an accurate description honestly!! i bet all of junhwe's coworkers are completely baffled by the amount he talks about jinhwan too lmao
[sends you lots of love and kisses] i need to owe up to junhwan and actually write for them... but yes please do anticipate it'll come.. eventually...
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this makes me wonder if yunhyeong had tried harder then maybe they could have gotten out of the paradox?? or maybe it would have just made it worse or the entire situation was inevitable One thing about the consistency principle that fascinates me is that there are no 'what if's -- the paradox is contingent on there being no possibility of an alternative sequence of events. So technically, yunhyeong couldn't have done anything to change the outcome, and if he'd done something differently, it would only have helped create the the original outcome. I DON'T KNOW IF I'M MAKING SENSE, for someone who has very little knowledge about physics I have a lot to say about theories of time travel u__u
i bet all of junhwe's coworkers are completely baffled by the amount he talks about jinhwan too lmao HAHA YES. Which is why donghyuk recognises jinhwan immediately (since junhwe talks about jinhwan so much donghyuk demands to see photos) and is like. YOU. YOU ARE JINHWAN. THE JINHWAN.
[sends you love and kisses back] I WILL BE ANTICIPATING THIS 'EVENTUALLY' <3
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