[fanfiction] The Most Incredible, Awesome, Kick-Ass, Foolproof Date Plan Ever 3/6
Chapter 2 - Step 2
Currently:
where: outside Elizaveta’s house
when: it’s 13:30, 30 minutes until the most awesome day goes down. I’ve been up since 5.
listening: the radio. Though I’ve prepared a mix CD for when Elizaveta joins me (it’s made up of Classical because… Well, girls like Mozart, right? Right.)
watching: Elizaveta’s house. (she had toast for breakfast, KD for lunch)
-
Day started off pretty normal. I was up at five but Lud and father had already been up for an hour already (which is really all that shocking as they both go to bed at, like, eight) and both had already found the cure for cancer and AIDS, solved world hunger, written the treaty for World Peace and found environmentally stable and economically affordable energy sources. But won’t share it because they want breakfast first
It’s basically my job to cook at our house or else it doesn’t get done and we’d be living on wursts and take-out. We have toast because I’m way too excited/happy/awesome to make a proper breakfast.
Dad notices immediately.
DiaLog - April 25th, 6:00 - This Year
@ the breakfast table.
Arnold Beilschmidt (AKA: Dad): What’s wrong Gilbert? (And he’s got his paper open and it’s in fucking German because moving to an ENGLISH-SPEAKING NATION doesn’t mean would should accept their culture. NO, we have to get the newspaper fucking flooooooown in from Berlin every-fucking-morning just so we can say “Fuck you! We’re German!” - okay a bit ranty. I’m not German. I’m Prussian.)
Me: Nothing (Like I’m going to tell my dad I have a date.)
Dad: (he turns to brother) Ludwig?
Ludwig: (-to the tune of “Spiderman”- Cockblock Man. Clockblock man. Does whatever a chastity belt can. Stops that awesome, any size. See that chick? Now you don’t. Watch out, here comes the Cockblock Man.) He’s got a date.
Dad: Oh really now? And who is it?
Me: Your mom…
Lud: Nana? I thought you were going with Elizaveta?
Me: H-How did you know?
Lud: Saw it on Lucy’s facebook.
Me: Dammit…
Dad: No swearing at the table.
-End DiaLog-
Okay, so then all of goddamn Facebook knows I’m going to the amusement park and only after talking to Lucy, who heard if from Feliciano who read it off of Matthew’s livejournal who was with Alfred at school who happened to be standing near us when I asked Elizaveta out for the first time.
Suffice to say I hate my school.
Oh shit, Elizaveta’s noticed me. Time to officially start Step 2 of “The most Incredible, Awesome, Kick-Ass, Foolproof Date Plan Ever.”
DiaLog - April 25th, 13:34 - This Year
Elizaveta: Gilbert, what are you doing outside my house? How long have you been here?
Me: I’m here to pick you up for your awesome date. And I’ve only been here a few minutes. Oh, and you put way too much milk in your KD. Seriously, cut back or you might get fat. (Okay, this was supposed to be a compliment. I was implying that she was thin, but Lizzie apparently didn’t think it was that compliment-y.)
Her: Do you really want to date me Gilbert or is this just some weird idea you cooked up in that fat head of yours to ruin my life?
Me: I really want to date you! Really Lizzie! I’m sorry!
Her: Wow, Gilbert apologizing to me. (oh thank God she got in the car.) I must be dreaming. And no, I don’t need to know how you should be a dream because you’re soooo amazing that reality can’t handle you. Let’s just try to have a nice time, okay Gilbert?
Me: Touchy…
So I turn on the radio and we drive for a few minutes in silence and then Elizaveta starts playing with my radio. Don’t girls not you don’t touch that? It freaks guys out!
Me: Stop that.
Her: What is this you’re listening to anyway? Sounds like stuff Roderich would play.
Me: (I slap her hand away) it’s Mozart. Roddy listens to Chopin. There’s a difference.
Her: It’s bullshit. (So as I’m driving along she opens the middle compartment and pulls out my CD bag and starts rummaging through. Now, I’m gonna make a bold statement here and say that you really don’t want the girl you’ve been pining after to find your secret stash of not-so-manly CDs(ex: Shania Twain, Michael Jackson, Michael Bublé))
-Note to Self-
CHANGE CDS IN CAR.
Oh my God. She found my glee CD… I’m never going to hear the end of this. Seriously, I should just move to Siberia right now with Ivan, Toris and Feliks and start fiddle lessons and just sit on a roof all day I mean-
Her: Hey, isn’t this glee? I didn’t know you watch that show.
Me: Psh, I don’t, that’s Ludwig’s. (nice save.)
Her: Oh… I thought you might watch it. I love it. (omigod. She’s blushing.)
Me: Okay, confession time. I like it, but don’t fucking tell anyone. Alfred, Franny and Antonio will never let me hear the end of it.
Her: Can we listen if I promise not to tell?
Me: Deal.
-End DiaLog-
The rest of the ride we sing Defying Gravity and are actually laughing and having a good time and she wasn’t yelling at me, or threatening me with a frying pan or talking about Roderich. She was having fun with ME.
So we arrive at the amusement park and I totally forget to put my hands over her eyes but I don’t care because she totally wants Mr. Schu and Mrs. Pillsbury to get together too and we both think that Finn should’ve punched Puck when he found out he wasn’t the father of Quinn’s baby!
Christ, I can’t believe I just wrote that. I’m gayer than fucking Feliks. But it doesn’t matter. Elizaveta is here with me and she’s smiling, giggling and being really, really nice. It’s like we’ve been friends all along.
Today is going to be amazing. Nothing is going to ruin this. Ever.
OH WAIT.
JUST KIDDING.
Franny/Anto: (From halfway across the goddamn parking lot. HOW DID THEY FUCKING FIND ME?) GIIIIIIIIIIIILBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
etcetera.
Step 3>>
Author's Note
I'm up on the help_haiti comm and you can pay for fanfic if you're interested~
Also, something from this fanfic’s outline that never made it into the final draft:
That Pole was hitting on Matthew today. Doesn’t he know Mattie’s my guy to hit on for fun?!
A meant Pole as in he was Polish.
Not that he had a ‘pole.’
Yeah.