Poem: Compensation
compensation.
by Dementis
i.
she was a girl without a "once upon a time."
pretty only to boys in Batman t-shirts
and braces in their senior year.
brilliant to her history teachers,
a talented writer who
(with a stroke of her magic pen)
could move her audience to tears.
she was underweight but not at all
un-attract-ive
(a fast metabolism with a quicker wit)
and her smile was dim
but held in it no dental flaws,
no unwritten verses,
no secrets.
ii.
criticism was nothing new to her,
for in the past,
she had been called
boyish or
cold or
intimidating.
she had shirked it once,
laughed out her awkwardness,
and began to don eyeliner and skirts.
her legs were
cold and
thin and
pale,
but she was accepted
(for a time).
the short-skirted girls still called her
cold
even for her attending parties
or social events,
but she would do her crying in
private
for fear of the accusation of being
weak.
iii.
high school was no living hell
but no dead heaven either,
and in it,
she discovered her identity.
straight-A student with thick-rimmed glasses
and t-shirts with bands that nobody else knew,
inside jokes and cynicism.
colored hair -
each new bottle of dye
spoke volumes
of her need for self-control.
iv.
she made a friend
that she pulled from the ruins
of a broken relationship.
her friend was a girl without a
"happily ever after,"
pretty not even to herself,
brilliant only to those who allowed her to be,
a struggling writer who
(by holding her pencil too tightly)
would bring herself to tears.
trying too hard and seeking attention,
and so she saw the opportunity
for control.
with a word, she could cut this friend down,
silence her opinions
and show her the way she herself had once felt.
criticize her tastes,
this girl with legs too pale
and heart too broken,
grip her by the self-confidence
and shake her hard enough
that she could fall apart right there
(right in the palms of her hands).
v.
pathetic:
"you're my best friend in the world."
and a lie:
"you're a close friend as well."
she watched as her friend
bent so much,
she broke.
vi.
she was a girl who long ago
gave up on "happily ever after."
(so she stole someone else's
instead.)
by Dementis
i.
she was a girl without a "once upon a time."
pretty only to boys in Batman t-shirts
and braces in their senior year.
brilliant to her history teachers,
a talented writer who
(with a stroke of her magic pen)
could move her audience to tears.
she was underweight but not at all
un-attract-ive
(a fast metabolism with a quicker wit)
and her smile was dim
but held in it no dental flaws,
no unwritten verses,
no secrets.
ii.
criticism was nothing new to her,
for in the past,
she had been called
boyish or
cold or
intimidating.
she had shirked it once,
laughed out her awkwardness,
and began to don eyeliner and skirts.
her legs were
cold and
thin and
pale,
but she was accepted
(for a time).
the short-skirted girls still called her
cold
even for her attending parties
or social events,
but she would do her crying in
private
for fear of the accusation of being
weak.
iii.
high school was no living hell
but no dead heaven either,
and in it,
she discovered her identity.
straight-A student with thick-rimmed glasses
and t-shirts with bands that nobody else knew,
inside jokes and cynicism.
colored hair -
each new bottle of dye
spoke volumes
of her need for self-control.
iv.
she made a friend
that she pulled from the ruins
of a broken relationship.
her friend was a girl without a
"happily ever after,"
pretty not even to herself,
brilliant only to those who allowed her to be,
a struggling writer who
(by holding her pencil too tightly)
would bring herself to tears.
trying too hard and seeking attention,
and so she saw the opportunity
for control.
with a word, she could cut this friend down,
silence her opinions
and show her the way she herself had once felt.
criticize her tastes,
this girl with legs too pale
and heart too broken,
grip her by the self-confidence
and shake her hard enough
that she could fall apart right there
(right in the palms of her hands).
v.
pathetic:
"you're my best friend in the world."
and a lie:
"you're a close friend as well."
she watched as her friend
bent so much,
she broke.
vi.
she was a girl who long ago
gave up on "happily ever after."
(so she stole someone else's
instead.)