fucking depressed
Well I am depressed as usual. I feel all alone. Kind of feels like last semester and the semester before that and before that. Loneliness always has its way of finding me. Jesus I am depressed. I am not heatly either. I go and I freak work my ass off by not eating bad things and eating good things and eating less and I work out like a freaking animal you know what its not good enough. I think I am just one fucked up human. I don't lose weight either. I go get tested for my cholestrol and you know what. Its high. Then i decided that hell im going to give blood. The last two times everything was find. No not this time. My blood does not have enough iron. Its not just a little low either. It is bad low. So hell if anything I suck. Now theres no one to talk to. The harder I try the worse I get. The more I practice at music the worse I seem to get. I think just overall I am tired. I need to go. I do. I didn't think I would make it this long. Hell whats the point.