THEY WERE ALL KISSY FACED AND HUGGY BODIED

[commonpleasure]

Not a whole lot to write about. Finals are almost over... well, not really since I haven't taken any yet, but yeah. Maggie and I have been packing shit up and it's really starting to look empty in here, it's weird. A large part of me is ready to be done for the year, with the classes and the drama and the public bathrooms, but the rest of me is going to miss things terribly. I can't imagine not being able to see everyone, even though I haven't really taken advantage of that the past month or so. DJ keeps talking about getting engaged, and while I am thrilled about that and fucking ecstatic about the idea of marrying him, I'm terrified, too. I love him so much, but I'm so afraid I'm going to sabotage this relationship like every other one I've had. I know things will be fine and he'll do the right thing at the right time, but I'm still nervous. I told him he has to wait a few months or more until I'm ready. Things are still tough between us sometimes, but I'm not worried because most of the time it's really good, and I know I couldn't have a better relationship with another person. I'm also positive I couldn't find anyone who is as patient as he is and as willing to put up with my shit and find it endearing. I think once I live there all the time we'll have a better idea of where we stand. Steve, I'm happy for you that you got your job, but I'm pissed that you're leaving. I wasn't lying when I said we were spending everyday together between the end of my finals and when you leave. Even if it's for like 2 minutes, I'm stalking you. I've done so much driving this week... yesterday I was at the apartment and had to go home to get the digital camera for Eric, then I went to the barn and went riding, then back to school, then back to the apartment. Today I came back to school to drop off my fucking contact sheets, and had I remembered them in the first place I wouldn't have had to come back today, because tonight I'm going home to celebrate my Mom's birthday and go to a horse club meeting and maybe go riding. Complete chaos. I hate change, good-byes, tests and crying. That's all that this week is comprised of, I'm sure of it. I'm still really depressed, but we're working through it... I fucking hate it, but I'm doing the best I can.