(no subject)
just reread everything from the past six years. six years. six years. six years. where the hell did the time go? im not really sure anymore either. everything has changed. i have new friends. i have a new life. i work a lot. i live in brooklyn. im completely unsure of my happiness. i dont think im doing what i should be doing with my life. im pretty sure every journal reiterates my inability to determine a future for myself. "am i happy? am i sad? am i content?" its all bullshit. i make my own decisions now and for the most part they have left me pretty fucking miserable. i cant let go of jason. no matter what i do, he is still there. its been how many fucking years and i cant let go? really elizabeth, lets be serious. i dont know what to do. im pretty sure he hates me with an intense passion. you know the one that ignores your phone calls and wishes bad things on you. maybe i deserve it but it will never take away how much i love him, ive always loved him. i dont think i want to live in brooklyn anymore. williamsburg is exactly what you would imagine. hipster fucking central. its great until you start talking to some pretentious asshole whose analyzed and successfully regurgitated everything from pitchforkmedia. but i guess you have that anywhere, right? i do enjoy the upper west side though. its quiet, jewish, and semi family oriented. why those things appeal to me... i really could not tell you. in fact i hate children so we can go ahead and cross out the plus side of the upper west side being semi family oriented.