oye vey
So its the anniversary of Jim's death today... and a cousin of mine just died today... and I cant stop thinking bout mel... to much death for me to handle right now. its really hard for me, I did not get to say goodbye to any of them!!!!! im feeling sooooo alone right now. the one person I would call for comfort at these times well... I cant. I have been doing prety well the past few days, but its hard when all this stuff happens. I just want to hear her voice it always calms me down... but I cant I promised. I wish I could start work this second so I would have something to distract me, monday at 1:00pm couldnt come sooner. I have taken alot of walks but I always come back feeling more drained then refreshed.
Atleast I am being social, I braved a party lastnight. It was overwhelming being there all these girls that are really close and have this bond between them all. Then there is me feeling like those dam social anxiety commercials. I would talk to them if there was like two or three of em around, atleast I talked to some people. then like 3 of em and I went on a failed taco bell mission, the highlight was when savage garden came on and we all were singing trying not to let anyone else know we knew the song. Then we came back and everyone had their girlfriends and were all cuddly so I left. Oh well... I have my brown bear :)
RIP JIM
RIP MEL
RIP PHIL
I love you all and miss each one of you so much.
Atleast I am being social, I braved a party lastnight. It was overwhelming being there all these girls that are really close and have this bond between them all. Then there is me feeling like those dam social anxiety commercials. I would talk to them if there was like two or three of em around, atleast I talked to some people. then like 3 of em and I went on a failed taco bell mission, the highlight was when savage garden came on and we all were singing trying not to let anyone else know we knew the song. Then we came back and everyone had their girlfriends and were all cuddly so I left. Oh well... I have my brown bear :)
RIP JIM
RIP MEL
RIP PHIL
I love you all and miss each one of you so much.