(no subject)
This morning was the first morning in over four years that I dragged my sorry ass out of a nice warm bed at 7 in the morning to go to church. I met with Chris's family at Mars Hill, a popular nondenominational church in the area (I'm really thankful that they're not Catholic because with my knee all messed up I don't think I would have survived the 'stand up sit down kneel sit kneel stand sit' routine).
Anyways, the church was set up in a large auditorium, with hundreds of chairs circled around a stage, where the band was set up. The band consisted of a heavily tattooed rhythm guitarist, a bored-looking bassist, a lead guitarist who looked like the Numa-Numa guy from YouTube, and a pair of chick singers in long, brightly-colored skirts and mis-matching sweaters. It looked like your stereotypical cheesy Christian rock band. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against stereotypical cheesy Christian rock-- it's just not my bag.
The first twenty minutes of the mass was just a block of music, and the cheesy-looking Christian rock band proved to be equally as cheesy sounding. My biggest beef with Christian rock is that it all sounds the same to me-- female vocalists with sweet sounding voices and bad guitar riffs ripped off of a Semisonic album, accompanied by lyrics that aren't clever and don't rhyme ("God is here, God is great, God is my King, Praise Him, Praise Jesus, blah blah blah, oceans and streams and other miscellaneous nature motifs, He loves children, He is mighty, we are united together, lift your voices, Amen"). I actually like some Christian music (Sufjan Stevens, Relient K, Five Iron Frenzy), but it's the way the message is conveyed. I'm drawn to lyrics that are meaningful and poetic, not just prose about the majesty of JESUS.
This preference is probably do to my snobbish music tastes as well as my floundering faith in religion. I was raised Catholic, but my liberal mindset only made church painfully confusing. After unpleasant run ins with many a bible-thumper, I denounced Christianity altogether. Now, I'm willing to accept the idea and concept of God, but I'm still tentative to attach myself to Christianity again; I find the majority of the religion to be too closed minded and the people who follow it to be too judgmental (generally).
But I digress.
During this music segment, I noticed that to my right sat two girls in their Sunday best, singing at the top of their lungs. They were carbon copies of the girls you see on the "MUSIC OF MY FAITH" CD commercials, with their eyes closed (occasionally shedding tears, as well) and waving their arms in the air. I watched them for quite some time as they opened their mouths impossibly wide to sing out with fervor to these 2-dimensional lyrics about Christ's love and God's work, faces contorted with passion.
At first, they terrified me.
But then, I started to think that they must feel the same way I do when attending a concert where my favorite band is playing. That strange, fleeting, transcendent feeling that I get when listening to a song that means something to me... they feel it around them, about their entire lives. I felt a little empty in comparison to these girls who raised their arms and sang their hearts out to a song that meant nothing to me.
I wish I cared half as much about anything as they care about their faith.
Even if it makes me look like a dork with my eyes closed and my arms outstretched.
Anyways, the church was set up in a large auditorium, with hundreds of chairs circled around a stage, where the band was set up. The band consisted of a heavily tattooed rhythm guitarist, a bored-looking bassist, a lead guitarist who looked like the Numa-Numa guy from YouTube, and a pair of chick singers in long, brightly-colored skirts and mis-matching sweaters. It looked like your stereotypical cheesy Christian rock band. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against stereotypical cheesy Christian rock-- it's just not my bag.
The first twenty minutes of the mass was just a block of music, and the cheesy-looking Christian rock band proved to be equally as cheesy sounding. My biggest beef with Christian rock is that it all sounds the same to me-- female vocalists with sweet sounding voices and bad guitar riffs ripped off of a Semisonic album, accompanied by lyrics that aren't clever and don't rhyme ("God is here, God is great, God is my King, Praise Him, Praise Jesus, blah blah blah, oceans and streams and other miscellaneous nature motifs, He loves children, He is mighty, we are united together, lift your voices, Amen"). I actually like some Christian music (Sufjan Stevens, Relient K, Five Iron Frenzy), but it's the way the message is conveyed. I'm drawn to lyrics that are meaningful and poetic, not just prose about the majesty of JESUS.
This preference is probably do to my snobbish music tastes as well as my floundering faith in religion. I was raised Catholic, but my liberal mindset only made church painfully confusing. After unpleasant run ins with many a bible-thumper, I denounced Christianity altogether. Now, I'm willing to accept the idea and concept of God, but I'm still tentative to attach myself to Christianity again; I find the majority of the religion to be too closed minded and the people who follow it to be too judgmental (generally).
But I digress.
During this music segment, I noticed that to my right sat two girls in their Sunday best, singing at the top of their lungs. They were carbon copies of the girls you see on the "MUSIC OF MY FAITH" CD commercials, with their eyes closed (occasionally shedding tears, as well) and waving their arms in the air. I watched them for quite some time as they opened their mouths impossibly wide to sing out with fervor to these 2-dimensional lyrics about Christ's love and God's work, faces contorted with passion.
At first, they terrified me.
But then, I started to think that they must feel the same way I do when attending a concert where my favorite band is playing. That strange, fleeting, transcendent feeling that I get when listening to a song that means something to me... they feel it around them, about their entire lives. I felt a little empty in comparison to these girls who raised their arms and sang their hearts out to a song that meant nothing to me.
I wish I cared half as much about anything as they care about their faith.
Even if it makes me look like a dork with my eyes closed and my arms outstretched.