river deep
Evan smacks his right blade against the ice three times in a row, and then the left and then the right again twice more, following with the left. He's meeting his new choreographer today, some guy named Jeff, because Lori has given up and this guy is like, super awesome.
Anyway, Jeff, or whatever his name is, is super late already and Evan's nervous. He hates it when people are late. He's ten minutes early everywhere and if he's late, he literally has a panic attack. (Once, Frank had taken too long with his tie and they were only five minutes early for a meeting and Evan nearly cried.)
A door bangs open and a minute later a man about Evan's height with bright blond hair comes rushing in, apologizing profusely.
"Oh no, I'm so sorry," he says, and Evan's eye twitches nervously. "Really, my flight was late so I slept in late and this is the worst impression to make the first time, oh my god." He laughs at himself, flashing a wide smile and Evan is sort of dazed when he sticks out his hand.
"I'm Jeff," he says, the smile still on his face. "You're Evan, right?"
Evan reaches out and takes his hand, nodding. This is going to be a long month.
--
"No, no, no, Evan, come on, do it right!" Jeff yells at him for the hundredth time that day. Evan thought Jeff was going to be easy to bend over backward and walk all over, but Jeff's kind of a hard-ass.
Evan sighs, putting his hand on his knees before straightening again.
"I just don't get it," he says, frustrated. Jeff skates over and puts his hands on Evan's hips, and as a shock travels up Evan's spine, he moves them, holding them in place.
"Your hips are the problem," he murmurs, fingers squeezing. "Make sure to keep them steady, okay?" And then his hands are gone and Evan's left breathless on the ice.
--
Evan keeps falling on his footwork.
It's simple footwork, and by all rights Evan should be able to do it and sometimes he can. Just, not when Jeff is around.
When Jeff is around all Evan can think of is his fingers pressed into his hips, his breath in his ear, lips inches from his skin. It's not like he's never had a crush on a guy before, sure, that's whatever, they were just crushes and he's never acted on them before.
But he's also never really wanted to act on it before.
So yeah, Evan definitely can't concentrate when Jeff's around and that's never been a problem. He's not sure he likes it.
--
Evan gets to the rink at the same time everyday, and generally, so does Jeff.
Except one day when Evan comes in and Jeff's already on the ice, working through Evan's program. But when he does it, when Jeff's out there gliding around and jumping easily into footwork and spread eagles and spins, the program is beautiful. Not like when Evan does it. Evan feels stiff and awkward when he does it, probably because he's always stiff and awkward, not like Jeff who just moves so easily and gracefully and watching him makes Evan feel a little sick.
Jeff finally notices when Evan skates with him out onto the ice, catching up to him and grabbing his wrists, looking him in the eyes and saying sincerely, "I will try my hardest to be better, Jeff."
Jeff just smiles at him as they spin a little, still holding on to each other's wrists.
--
He does do better, and by the time he gets to his first competition of the season, his program is almost half as beautiful as when Jeff does it. It gets him a silver, and he's happy with that. So is Frank, and so is Jeff.
"I can't believe you got a silver!" Jeff says in his ear, squeezing his side. They're at the banquet, a drink in Jeff's hand and ginger ale for Evan. Evan smiles tightly at him, ignoring how he can feel Jeff's hand still on him, skin hot under the layers of fabric. He takes a sip of his ginger ale and Jeff winks at him.
Evan's mouth opens to say something, anything about how much he likes Jeff and how they should hang out more and be together more and maybe make out a little but a guy comes up to Jeff, hugging him from behind, kissing his cheek and Evan sees the way Jeff melts back into him, turns into his embrace easily and presses a kiss to his lips.
He excuses himself quietly to go talk to another one of Frank's students, leaving Jeff smiling, confused, behind him.
--
"Mongoose, let me give you some advice." The voice is sharp in Evan's ear, making him jump and turn away from where he'd been watching Jeff and that man together. He looks at Johnny, sighing.
"What, Johnny?" he says, tired because Johnny's beaten him again and one day Evan will be better. One day. In the meantime, he supposes they can be friends.
"If you're in love with your choreographer, it's best to actually tell him," Johnny says, giving him a look. "Or you can fire him. Or, you know, just drop out of competition entirely. That's always an option." Johnny flashes a grin at him and Evan has to smile back.
"Shut up, Swan. In your dreams." Johnny just shrugs at him and flounces off to talk to Drew. Evan sees the way they laugh together, the way Drew's head tips to the side automatically so Johnny can whisper into it, grinning. Evan feels something like longing gnaw at his chest and he has to look away. He needs to leave.
--
"Evan why did you bolt out so fast last night?" Jeff asks over continental breakfast, his hair askew and Evan can see a faint purple mark peeking over Jeff's collar. His eyes go back to Jeff's face quickly, and he forces a smile.
"I just felt a little sick. Social anxiety, you know," he laughs, standing. "See you later, Jeff. I have more packing to do."
--
On the plane, Jeff's head falls onto Evan's shoulder as he sleeps, and Evan doesn't move, not wanting to wake him.
--
"Jeff?" Evan whispers, jiggling his shoulder a bit. Jeff's head flops around before he wakes up, confused.
"You fell asleep. We just landed." Jeff blinks a couple of times, nodding.
"Thanks. Sorry I fell asleep on you."
"It's fine."
Evan's out of the chair and grabbing his carry-on before Jeff can say whatever else he wanted to.
--
"Evan," Jeff says, skating up to him a few days later, cornering him at the boards.
"We're going out."
"Wh-what?" Evan stutters, because Jeff is a little too close for him right now, and his breathing has already sped up too much for his liking.
"We're going out! Tonight! To a club, okay? And I want you to dance with me."
"It's the middle of the season," Evan argues, but Jeff's already skating away, dancing to music only he hears.
--
The club is loud and hot and sticky and sweaty. Evan can feel the moisture in the air every time he takes a breath, and he feels as though he can barely move. Jeff has a drink in his hand, keeps offering it to Evan and Evan keeps refusing.
"It's competition season," he says every time, and Jeff just sighs. A song starts and he grabs Evan's wrist, pulling him to the dance floor so he can fit himself to Evan, back to front, grinding his rear end into Evan's front, putting Evan's hands on his hips.
"It's like your choreography," Jeff mumbles, head tipping back onto Evan's shoulder a little, his eyes sliding shut. Evan knows Jeff must be able to feel how hard he is and how it's not going away. Maybe he's too drunk to notice. Or care.
"You just have to let go," he mumbles, lips brushing Evan's cheek and before he knows what he's doing, Evan's turned his head and is kissing Jeff right there, in the middle of a club.
He pulls away suddenly, shocked.
"I need to leave," Evan stutters, rushing out of the building, leaving Jeff alone once again.
--
There's a knock on Evan's door an hour and a half later, and he answers, shirtless, in a pair of sweatpants. He realizes it's Jeff and makes a noise, trying to cover himself up.
"Look, Jeff-" He starts awkwardly, trying to find the words. "I'm really-"
"Kiss me again," Jeff interrupts him, putting a hand on the door frame. He doesn't look or seem drunk, and Evan gapes.
"What?"
"Fine, I'll do it myself," he says, stepping forward and tugging Evan down to kiss him.
--
Evan doesn't miss a beat this time, kissing him back almost immediately, hands going to Jeff's face and into his hair. Jeff's hands are on his chest, his hips, sliding around to grope at him a little through his sweatpants, and Evan hasn't kissed anyone like this in a long time.
But that still doesn't mean he should be.
He struggles for a moment, trying to get away from Jeff's hands, but Jeff has planned for this, he's holding him close, not letting him get away, and Evan can't stop kissing him.
--
They end up on the couch through some clever maneuvering around the furniture in Evan's living room, Jeff landing on Evan's lap, straddling it, still kissing him like he's dying. Evan's hands slip down over Jeff's hips and over his backside, pulling their hips together. Jeff breaks the kiss to gasp, breathing hard against Evan's neck.
Evan catches his breath, slides his hand up under Jeff's shirt and tugs it off, kissing him again.
--