(no subject)
This is going to be the most random entry i have ever made. Don't bother reading it unless you want to hear me ramble on about random things i think of from day to day.
A utopian society cannot rely upon a capitalist framework. Its based too much on personal gain.
I'm afraid one day I'm going to wake up and not remember anything that led up to that point. Not just the normal binge drinking blackout, but a full blown memory erase. I'm slowly coming to learn that I don't remember a lot of my past. I either never remembered it in the first place or its all fading away. I'm also afraid this is due to over use of marijuana...
There are a few options for this situation:
a. write everything down
b. quit smoking
I guess thats it on that subject.
I went home last weekend and didn't tell my parents I was home. It felt like i had run away from home and that I didn't have a place to call 'home' anymore. It scared me.
I'm also running out of money. I need a job really bad, but at the same time I have little to no time to go look for a job. I have no idea what I'm doing.
I shouldn't even really be a GD major. I want to do Industrial Design but I can't. It would be too much trouble, money, time. I just can't do it.
I'm being robbed by living in new res. $11K is not appropriate for what I live in. To make it even worse everyone in my suite has never had to clean up after themselves and leave the entire place looking horribly disgusting.
This is one of the most uncomfortable times of my life. Running out of money, running out of time, living in a continuosly disgusting enviornment. Everything is closing in so fast. Im practically at full speed but the collapse is catching up and to make things worse winter is coming. FUCK ME.
The government scares me now. Not the bullshit they put on the news and stuff, I'm talking about what really goes on. Bush doesn't run this country and its obvious, so who does?
My roommate is a fucking moron. He apparently has no idea whats going on around him or how to handle many situations. He will say the most unapropriate things at the worst times. People in general around me now seem never to understand whats going on around them and that is what led to having RA's come into two suites I was in. Fucking Idiots. Either way I got out of trouble both times so it worked out for me.
I've had a cigarette burn on my arm for almost 2 weeks now because I keep ripping the scab off. Everyone thinks the scab is disgusting but I can't stop doing it. I have always ripped them off and I probably always will.
I have and addictive personality in the sense that as soon as I like something I want as much of it as I can get. Moderation means nothing to me. This will probably kill me one day.
I will not succeed until I fail. Fail completely. Rock bottom. Once I can finally know that the safety net is gone I will become my own person.
If you hate someone and they love you, should you tell them? Is it worse to just pretend you could be friends?
This is depressing me and it did not go in the direction I thought it was going to.
A utopian society cannot rely upon a capitalist framework. Its based too much on personal gain.
I'm afraid one day I'm going to wake up and not remember anything that led up to that point. Not just the normal binge drinking blackout, but a full blown memory erase. I'm slowly coming to learn that I don't remember a lot of my past. I either never remembered it in the first place or its all fading away. I'm also afraid this is due to over use of marijuana...
There are a few options for this situation:
a. write everything down
b. quit smoking
I guess thats it on that subject.
I went home last weekend and didn't tell my parents I was home. It felt like i had run away from home and that I didn't have a place to call 'home' anymore. It scared me.
I'm also running out of money. I need a job really bad, but at the same time I have little to no time to go look for a job. I have no idea what I'm doing.
I shouldn't even really be a GD major. I want to do Industrial Design but I can't. It would be too much trouble, money, time. I just can't do it.
I'm being robbed by living in new res. $11K is not appropriate for what I live in. To make it even worse everyone in my suite has never had to clean up after themselves and leave the entire place looking horribly disgusting.
This is one of the most uncomfortable times of my life. Running out of money, running out of time, living in a continuosly disgusting enviornment. Everything is closing in so fast. Im practically at full speed but the collapse is catching up and to make things worse winter is coming. FUCK ME.
The government scares me now. Not the bullshit they put on the news and stuff, I'm talking about what really goes on. Bush doesn't run this country and its obvious, so who does?
My roommate is a fucking moron. He apparently has no idea whats going on around him or how to handle many situations. He will say the most unapropriate things at the worst times. People in general around me now seem never to understand whats going on around them and that is what led to having RA's come into two suites I was in. Fucking Idiots. Either way I got out of trouble both times so it worked out for me.
I've had a cigarette burn on my arm for almost 2 weeks now because I keep ripping the scab off. Everyone thinks the scab is disgusting but I can't stop doing it. I have always ripped them off and I probably always will.
I have and addictive personality in the sense that as soon as I like something I want as much of it as I can get. Moderation means nothing to me. This will probably kill me one day.
I will not succeed until I fail. Fail completely. Rock bottom. Once I can finally know that the safety net is gone I will become my own person.
If you hate someone and they love you, should you tell them? Is it worse to just pretend you could be friends?
This is depressing me and it did not go in the direction I thought it was going to.