despite the status quo.
i have been doing good about being on the internet less.
mostly because its not so convieniently right there in the middle of my living room.
im in love with chelsey.
im in love with the plans we've made.
this is real love.
ill see you in two months, four weeks.
in less than that i will be 18. it should be a pivotal time in my life, a day signifying change and learning, maturation, adulthood.
but its not.
because no matter how hard im trying to be seventeen right now, ive already been thirty.
no matter how much i long to be free of responsibility, dependant and adolescent, i know that isn't me.
i know there is in fact change to come, but it isn't the same.
it will be greater. and an accomplishment that will vastly out do anything i have ever experienced.
im so terrible with words. i mean, when im on the spot. i try to write spontaniously, like i speak, but it would be incomprehensible.
im working on it, but so far...
list of things to do/ goals before the end of may;
1)reinitiate friendships, the ones that i valued and have lost touch with. for whatever reason.
2)get around to designating specs for my powerbook, that i need well before college.
3)read the fifteen or so books left on that list miss parr gave us of books we should read before completeing high school.
4)find something to miss about corpus.
5)see uncle vic. and spend time with my mommie. and my gramma.
6)revisit locations of signifigant events in my life.
7)write my senior column (ive been working on this one at least two years now).
8)organize portfolio.
9)talk.
10)spray paint a gold spider on the roof of the dashcat's car.
and like i said, im working on it.
mostly because its not so convieniently right there in the middle of my living room.
im in love with chelsey.
im in love with the plans we've made.
this is real love.
ill see you in two months, four weeks.
in less than that i will be 18. it should be a pivotal time in my life, a day signifying change and learning, maturation, adulthood.
but its not.
because no matter how hard im trying to be seventeen right now, ive already been thirty.
no matter how much i long to be free of responsibility, dependant and adolescent, i know that isn't me.
i know there is in fact change to come, but it isn't the same.
it will be greater. and an accomplishment that will vastly out do anything i have ever experienced.
im so terrible with words. i mean, when im on the spot. i try to write spontaniously, like i speak, but it would be incomprehensible.
im working on it, but so far...
list of things to do/ goals before the end of may;
1)reinitiate friendships, the ones that i valued and have lost touch with. for whatever reason.
2)get around to designating specs for my powerbook, that i need well before college.
3)read the fifteen or so books left on that list miss parr gave us of books we should read before completeing high school.
4)find something to miss about corpus.
5)see uncle vic. and spend time with my mommie. and my gramma.
6)revisit locations of signifigant events in my life.
7)write my senior column (ive been working on this one at least two years now).
8)organize portfolio.
9)talk.
10)spray paint a gold spider on the roof of the dashcat's car.
and like i said, im working on it.