i just
admitted something i probably shouldn't have.
something i've never said out loud. or actually.. told anyone for that matter.
including my mother and brothers and my sister.
no one.
not even my best friend.
i don't know what came over me.
well i'm being a little dramatic, its not like that was even the half of it.
it gets much worse, much deeper, much more repressed than that.
but we'll stear clear of that conversation.
still, that felt strangely refreshing to actually say something about it. even if that's only a small part.
i always thought i would take it to my grave.