July 23rd.
I thought I was unhappy before I got a job. Then I got one. I won't go into details for legal reasons.
I was completetly and totally wrong. There are new unexplored depths to unhappiness that come with this. Obviously after three years it would have to be a pretty fucking spectacular job to meet up with my expectations. But all I have is an endless sinking feeling of; is this all there is in life? A few weeks in, and I want to give up.
I physically vommited during my break, and got a stress related blood nose no the way home. I know I NEED to keep going at it, but spend every waking moment in a panic ridden state knowing it is only a few more hours before I need to go back again. I am sure everyone in regular employment has this, and it's perfectly normal, and having so much freedom for so long has made it hard for me to click into time with the rest of the world again.
I just want something to look forward to- something that I can work towards, other than the simple fact that I need to work so I can work.
Since moving to Adelaide I have had my dreams crushed, and now I am being paid to be abused on a daily basis. It's like school but without the knowledge that you will get out after 12 years.
I was completetly and totally wrong. There are new unexplored depths to unhappiness that come with this. Obviously after three years it would have to be a pretty fucking spectacular job to meet up with my expectations. But all I have is an endless sinking feeling of; is this all there is in life? A few weeks in, and I want to give up.
I physically vommited during my break, and got a stress related blood nose no the way home. I know I NEED to keep going at it, but spend every waking moment in a panic ridden state knowing it is only a few more hours before I need to go back again. I am sure everyone in regular employment has this, and it's perfectly normal, and having so much freedom for so long has made it hard for me to click into time with the rest of the world again.
I just want something to look forward to- something that I can work towards, other than the simple fact that I need to work so I can work.
Since moving to Adelaide I have had my dreams crushed, and now I am being paid to be abused on a daily basis. It's like school but without the knowledge that you will get out after 12 years.