(no subject)
I seem to be unable to sleep tonight. I am very scared. I miss being happy. I miss the summer. I miss the Lower East Side. I miss a lot of things. I really need something to get better very soon. I need some inspiration. I can't be a self-generating machine for much longer. I need to do a show. I need to make enough money to save some. I need to find a girl. All the ones I seem to find have boyfriends already. I've decided to stop ruling them out based on that principal. If I were to leave every girl with a boyfriend alone, I don't think I'd ever go after one. I haven't met a girl without a boyfriend in four or five months. It's crazy. Women seem to go from boyfriend to boyfriend. I don't get that. I seem to have a girlfriend and then a year...and a half goes by until I have another one. I'm losing steam. I made rent this month. I quit my job at Jekyll and Hyde. I have a new job at a greek restaurant on the Upper West Side. I hope it works out. I'm worried that it is going to put a serious damper on my schedule. Already, I'm worried about one audition. I'm just so tired of being here. I'm getting impatient. It's been ten months now since I've been here. I want a life worth living. I've been putting off writing my play. I should start again. Beginning is the hardest part. I can't wait 'till spring. It just got very cold. I'm not looking forward to the freezing weather.