November Giraffe of the Month!
(Before you start to read and get scared...if you don't yet know about my Stalking and Murdering of a Childhood Giraffe project you should click on the pretty-ily colored underlined section of this sentence. If you are still scared after that, don't worry that feeling is quite common.)
The fact that I'm posting this 13 days late might say something about the (*insert stream of profanities including a new one I made up involving the word BEANS!*) month I had. There were some amazing bits thrown into the vat o' crap (aka a vat NOT on my "giant vats I want to fall into" list) and luckily for all of you some of those amazing things came in the form of giraffe shaped objects!
Now before I go on with the winners I feel the need to talk about three bizarre bits of progress in the project:
- 1. My dear friend Ali Raimes, the artist that got me my first international show and whose work I ADORE. She was in town to visit and in between gallery and museum frolics we spent much of a day searching for giraffes. She understands how much this project means to me and the last time she was in town we captured tons of them. But this time...honest-to-god we didn't find ANY. Not a one. I couldn't believe it! Barely a day goes by that I don't capture at least one, but every giraffe we walked past that day I said "Oh, I've already got that one."
2. For the 7th time since 2003 I went upstate and tore through boxes in my parents attic searching still for the missing giraffe. While I was unsuccesful, though I was convinced I had gone through every box 17 times, somehow I found two boxes I hadn't before. This gave me way too much hope. My christmas visit will be spent with me up in the attic. Occasionally I'll come down for a canoli or some strufla...
3. A fan of Fluff occasionally sends me giraffe links, actually a handful of Fluff fans so this, but this one in particular sends LOADS and while browsing through them the other day I SWEAR I saw it. The giraffe. THE giraffe! Unfortunately I have strict rules about buying the giraffe online and I won't even show all of you the actual link because I don't want any of you to buy it online either. I'm trying to figure out a way to visit an actual store that sells this, but the only ones I've come across are in California and Alabama. If one of you found it in a real store and bought it THEN sent it to me, it could count and would make a better ending to this long trek, but I won't guide you too much other than giving you this fuzzy image and a hint:
HINT: This giraffe is part of a religious toy set made by Noah's Bean Mates.
3rd place winner:
(captured with help of new giraffe hunter Andrea V.) There's something so incredibly sweet about this card and so incredibly devestated about my expression...almost as if I was in love with the elephant and the giraffe stole my meaty gray man away. Andrea found this card and though we work down the hall from each other actually mailed it to me, knowing I adore getting real mail. If THAT isn't the sign of an awesome person I'm not sure what is. Thanks Andrea!
2nd place winner:
This giraffe made me laugh really hard. The fact that it's stradling a giant pink icecream cone was pretty funny but the expression of the giraffe wrangler on top...dear me! (and THIS was in a kid's book!)
And now the 1st place NOVEMBER 2005 GIRAFFE OF THE MONTH!:
(giraffe MADE by giraffe hunter and puzzle expert Chris Yates) This is quite possibly one of the coolest gifts I've ever received. Along with creating one of my favorite webcomics, Chris makes this amazing wooden puzzles and do-dads. He sells them for MUCH less than he really should considering how fantastic they are. (pssst...If you are looking for holiday gift things you have to order by this Thursday, Dec. 1st.)
MOST DIFFICULT GIRAFFE OF THE MONTH:
(captured with help from giraffe hunter Chris Y.) Can you find the giraffe in this picture (that was taken in Missouri or Kansas or where ever the hell we were). Here I'll give you a closer look:
P.S. About TWO seconds after saying my goodbyes to Ali and we both chatted about how sad it was we didn't capture any giraffes, I got on the train and some little kid had taped a crayoned giraffe to the subway wall of the car I was in! I was beyond giddy about it and captured it of course, confusing everyone in my car. I forgot to upload it to show all of you, but I will tonight. It gave me renewed hope in the hunt.
The Amazing List of Amazing Fellow Giraffe Hunters as of November 28:
Annie S., Mike O., Nim W., superkunt, chipb, funkymama, dollomite, chrissigrl, Annemarie G., drsmax, raygunn_revival, Ali R., Drew S., Michael S., Aaron H., clevortrevor, Evan D., Dad V., Mom V., Lizz B., Jim H., dead_kitty, Danny B., eat_you_up, Carol B., sketchartists, clarksgirl, xambush_bugx, handifunk, Molly O., wearebothcats, Kevin C., Suma B., chris_moreno, Victoria K., Paula Q., tsudonimh, Eric S., Sara S., Ben, capearce, emodudley, Kelly L., rufushonkeriv, eskimopirate, scottbateman, mister_wolf, pvenables, mckenzee, Mason B., M.A. G., Andrea V., Chris Y. (let me know if I'm missing your name...I always feel like I'm missing people and it's getting hard to keep track!)
Rejected Giraffes Captured from November 2003 to November 28, 2005: 1,387 (holy, crap)
Giraffe I Am Searching For: (well I guess you can just look at the picture above now!) small, maybe 7 inches long, dark orange with deep brown spots which are more dots than actual giraffe spot shapes, deep black beaded eyes, barely any stuffing, the neck flops over to the side constantly, looks like a very cheap beany baby rip off, is the softest fabric in the world, has a long neck (you'd be surprised how many stuffed giraffes DON'T)
I'm a stickler for making rules and sticking by them no matter what in a project. These rules forced me to create FLUFF IN BROOKLYN out of insanity of not being allowed to "create art," so I guess they were a good idea after all!
THE RULES:
1. I must appear in every photograph in some way shape or form
2. I must not smile in any photograph
3. I may not hunt for giraffes on the internet, but must encounter them in real life
4. While internet giraffes sent to me by friendly folk make people added to the "hunter" list they aren't counted in the official picture count until they are hardcopy mailed to me (105 E. 2nd Street, Brooklyn, NY 11218) and then I take a picture with the picture (see THIS as an example, sent to me by clevortrevor)
5. I must not buy the giraffes I encounter other than the final giraffe (I've bent this one a bit mostly because I only made it so I wouldn't go broke!)
6. I may not accept any gallery shows until I find the final giraffe so there is a visible gap in my resume
7. I must not work on any other serious art projects until I find the final giraffe (which is why I started FLUFF out of frustration for not being able to do my normal art projects)
8. I must not give up no matter how frustrating it may get to keep these rules
Past Giraffes of the Month:
October 2004 Giraffes Were Modest
November 2004 Giraffes Kicked Rear-Booties
December 2004 giraffes made me cry
January 2005 giraffes contained one "carafe" and lots of laughter
February 2005 the month of the least giraffes, was chalk-full of crap
March 2005 giraffes involved blue screening fun
April 2005 I finally met some real-live ones
May 2005 giraffes were unintentionally pirate themed
June 2005 giraffes were wearable and tight in the tush
July 2005 giraffes were surreal
August 2005 I tipped the scales to go over 1,000 captured
September 2005 I drank a giraffe
October 2005 Annie S. became a giraffe