jam another dragon down the hole

[coledivison]

Comments

[staubs_obvs]

I don't speak boy.

[coledivison]

I've been trying to think of something I could translate it to that would make sense, but I just can't.

It's like a videogame of Twilight versus Anne Rice, I guess?

[ravivallman]

Twilight would go down so fucking hard. Lestat would just get up there and rape everyone. Figuratively.

[coledivison]

That's very true - Twilight objectifies the male characters (Edward) and really effeminates them quite a bit. For sure, Jasper and Emmett would put up a fight, but vegetarian vampires versus ARMAND? No contest.

Claudia would kick the shit out of Bella any day.

[ravivallman]

Louis would use his special attack: Whine, and no one will be able to escape the wrath of his brooding.

Claudia would kick the shit out of everyone. You wouldn't even need to play with anyone else. You could go through the whole game with Claudia.

[coledivison]

Edward would possibly counter with his special attack: DAZZLE and everyone would be stunned for a minute before the game froze up. Then everyone would just laugh before destroying him utterly.

Queen Akasha as assist.

[ravivallman]

I like how you made the DAZZLE DAZZLING. Anyway.

I never liked Queen Akasha but she could seriously kick some ass if you fucked her off.

[coledivison]

I was about to find a glitter text generator but I feel like I'd be putting TOO MUCH effort into it.

She could kick more ass than any film audience could have expected. It's too bad the movie was mired in so much awful weird music that distracted from the plot..

[ravivallman]

Edward is in no way worthy of such effort.

The whole movie was a train wreck. They severely fucked Lestat up, and turned him into a violinist who, when he came into contact with his violin was overwhelmed with such amazement. But he wasn't the fucking violinist. Anne Rice was appalled by Queen of the Damned. It was probably the reason she went all anal and stopped people from using her characters for anything other than masturbation.

[coledivison]

I think that movie is the reason why Anne Rice went all fundamentalist psychopath and now writes about God and Jesus and her family and denounces her fucked up vampire lores. She used to be cool, man.

[ravivallman]

That, or her husband croaked it and she said, "Fuck you Anne Rice vampires, I had faith in you." and turned her faith back to God.

She really did. Oh, how time changes old people.

[coledivison]

I also think she has diabetes. And loves God.

Of all the religions to go to after being atheist.. she chose the most restrictive.

[ravivallman]

She's a terrible human being.