Locked in a room, with your memory far, you don't where it is but you know where you are...
(Still haven't fixed the router. *ded*)
My Dad made me an Easter basket, did I mention it? I went out in the evening, around seven, and him and his gf were already in bed (which made me lol, because seriously? That's the middle of the night for them?) and he got up and spent some time with me and he went and got my basket and it was small, but he got me candy and a bunny and a little mechanical chick that jumps around (explaining that he'd got me a beanie baby but Pam totes stole it for herself so he got me a chick).
I don't know...that just made me love him even more? I mean, I'm almost 23 years old, and the man still made me an Easter basket.
I didn't even see or hear from my mother that day, no surprise, but...in hindsight I know I'm wrong. I know that the difference in the way I treat my parents is unfair, I can see where Nana gets so upset about it, but here's the thing.
My father has always loved me, unconditionally. I've never felt like I disappointed him, I've never felt embarassed by him, I've never been terrified of him. Sure, his way of parenting was rather disconnected, since I was raised by my mother and I've prolly seen him a quarter as much as I've seen my mother (since she was my day-to-day parent), but all of those times I've always been happy. I can give you horror stories of my mother raising me, of the emotional abuse, but I couldn't give you a single story of that for my father.
There's something strange to my love of my father, though. I'm hesitant to describe it...it's almost like the way you love a child? Sometimes I feel very protective of him because he tries so hard sometimes and it seems like everyone and everything just beats him down. He gets depressed and he reaches for me knowing that I'm the stronger one? I'm more patient with him than I'd ever be with my mother.
Even knowing that I'm unfair in the way I deal with my parents, I can't change it. My mother has betrayed me and fell way too far into drugs and crime for me to ever attempt a relationship with her again.
I just...I'm a Daddy's girl, you know?
My Dad made me an Easter basket, did I mention it? I went out in the evening, around seven, and him and his gf were already in bed (which made me lol, because seriously? That's the middle of the night for them?) and he got up and spent some time with me and he went and got my basket and it was small, but he got me candy and a bunny and a little mechanical chick that jumps around (explaining that he'd got me a beanie baby but Pam totes stole it for herself so he got me a chick).
I don't know...that just made me love him even more? I mean, I'm almost 23 years old, and the man still made me an Easter basket.
I didn't even see or hear from my mother that day, no surprise, but...in hindsight I know I'm wrong. I know that the difference in the way I treat my parents is unfair, I can see where Nana gets so upset about it, but here's the thing.
My father has always loved me, unconditionally. I've never felt like I disappointed him, I've never felt embarassed by him, I've never been terrified of him. Sure, his way of parenting was rather disconnected, since I was raised by my mother and I've prolly seen him a quarter as much as I've seen my mother (since she was my day-to-day parent), but all of those times I've always been happy. I can give you horror stories of my mother raising me, of the emotional abuse, but I couldn't give you a single story of that for my father.
There's something strange to my love of my father, though. I'm hesitant to describe it...it's almost like the way you love a child? Sometimes I feel very protective of him because he tries so hard sometimes and it seems like everyone and everything just beats him down. He gets depressed and he reaches for me knowing that I'm the stronger one? I'm more patient with him than I'd ever be with my mother.
Even knowing that I'm unfair in the way I deal with my parents, I can't change it. My mother has betrayed me and fell way too far into drugs and crime for me to ever attempt a relationship with her again.
I just...I'm a Daddy's girl, you know?