..'now i see what i am a thief a whore and a lier'...

[coh_kiy_fc]

I woke up today at 12 still kinda half asleep, I like days like this, means I’m so lost in dream world that reality doesn’t hit me for a while and so I remain happy, for a bit lol, and then it hits so I get fed up and vent on here lol, im sick of paranoia and anxiety I wrekcon im goin crazy its scary lol, I am so lost inside me these days, I can barely talk to people I have nothing to say to anyones, I just sit and smile,a dn whatch people get bored of me / hate me, I have an incredible nact of making people loose intrest in my friendship lol, oh and then there is the fact I have been sick for over 6 moths now yay….. all I do is do homework, maybe see and friend then sleep, I have no life, and as much as i want a social, life I cant be bothered, …….well here comes the chills….

I WISH I was not so dam NAIVE AND STUPID, I wish I wasn’t so easily betrayed….i wish I could hate, so I wouldn’t get hurt again and again……I wish every happy period wasn’t followed by a sad one

'Oh why can't I be what you need?
A new improved version of me.
But I'm nothing so good
no, I'm nothing...
just bones, a lonely ghost burning down songs
of violence, of love, and of sorrow.
But you don't see me. You dont.
Here I'm pinned between darkness and light,
bleached and blinded by these nights.
Where I'm tossing and tortured till dawn
The shock bleeds the red from my face,
Now you need me, now you don't. '