I Don't Wanna Grow Up.
Awwh, that brings back memories. Does anyone remember the Life on the Murder Scene? Because I sure do (mostly because I just watched it).
Anyway, I’m just now realizing how close I am to turning the big one-eight, and I’m also noticing that I’m just a few classes away from graduating. I’m really...really scared at this point. People - by people I mean family, not the friends I don’t have - keep telling me that, y’know, everything’s going to be fine and that I don’t need to worry about supporting myself yet, but I am! I should be able to support myself, shouldn’t I? I should have been saving my money!
Sigh.
Oh, and then there’s college. The more I think about it, the more I want to go, but also the more I’m convinced that I can’t do it. My illnesses are getting worse in that I can’t stay in one place for too long, and that it’s hard to eat away from the house. And eating without my mom or grandma there - they have to be with me or near me - just seems a little ridiculous. So, eight hours without eating or drinking? I’ve done it before, I s’pose I can do it again. Hey, maybe I’ll lose weight!
I’m really hoping Social Security pulls through. We need the money - I need the money; especially if I end up moving on campus (which, if I have to, I’m dreading). I’m really stressing out, and I really shouldn’t.
Any who, in other news, I requested a commission with Moonyen.deviantart.com! It’s my very first commission and I’m so stoked. She’s going to make me a Gerard Way Moonbun for exactly $33.00. Nice, right? And that includes shipping and handling. I thought it was going to be way more, but it turned out to be pretty affordable for me. Me who can’t hold onto her money to save her life. Me who gets a penny and buys gum. Me who finds ten bucks in the street and gives it to some homeless person.
Oh, and, before I go, d’you guys want to hear something funny? Well, here it is: I went to this meeting with my parents and some teachers and psychologists’ that tested me to see if I have any learning disabilities, and they said, “Because you are so emotionally disturbed, you cannot retain information.” And, of course, I was like, “W-what?” So the explained that I have some learning disabilities so severe that I’m not only classified by the state as “emotionally disturbed” but as “special”.
So, in other words, I AM NOW IN SPECIAL EDUCATION.
- Coffii M.