(no subject)
Te's Clark is *scary* - meant to say in "Easy People", really I did.
But Yeah.
Oh, the wrongness. Relations so incredibly *fucked up*. This is why I don't think I actually have an incest kink, so much as a morbid fascination for really fucked up relationships. And of course I don't like them in real life.
But yeah. The feeling of doom. I'm trying to think when I've felt a similar vibe in real life. When I was 10/11, and my best friend told me she wanted to have a baby because then "she wouldn't be lonely". Yeah. Shivers even then.
When I was 15, and the relationship between a 15 year old girl, and a guy who'd been her neighbour who I got the impression was probably *more* that 20 years older, who she was now living with, and who'd put the make on just after her father died.
Any relationship where at least one of the partners seemed to be displaying Borderline Personality Disorder type - relationship traits. (I used to think that was some kind of bogus mental disorder - now I don't. It's more a pattern of relationships than anything)
Quote: Getting out of a relationship with #them# is like trying to get out of Iraq.
Reading Te's latest CSA fic, I'm slightly disturbed by myself. I then I remembered that after watching The Devil's Rejects, I had some mental imagery of if I had been one of the victims, I'd have faked the whole, "don't hurt me, I'll do anything you want" with (any of) the guys, then bit off his penis (and testes), (and grinning, with blood over my teeth and running down my chin), then strangling him with the rope tying my arms together. Except, damn, I just tried it, and my proportions have changed since I was a child (well, duh), but I can no longer pull my arms round from behind my back. Bugger.
Anyway, and another was being in the room and just laughing like a crazy girl, because damn, if I really thought they were serial killers and I *wasn't* going to get out alive (ie they been all over the news, no survivors), fuck it, I wouldn't do what they said.
Anyway, so these were my *positive* mental 'what I would do in this situation' type things.
But Yeah.
Oh, the wrongness. Relations so incredibly *fucked up*. This is why I don't think I actually have an incest kink, so much as a morbid fascination for really fucked up relationships. And of course I don't like them in real life.
But yeah. The feeling of doom. I'm trying to think when I've felt a similar vibe in real life. When I was 10/11, and my best friend told me she wanted to have a baby because then "she wouldn't be lonely". Yeah. Shivers even then.
When I was 15, and the relationship between a 15 year old girl, and a guy who'd been her neighbour who I got the impression was probably *more* that 20 years older, who she was now living with, and who'd put the make on just after her father died.
Any relationship where at least one of the partners seemed to be displaying Borderline Personality Disorder type - relationship traits. (I used to think that was some kind of bogus mental disorder - now I don't. It's more a pattern of relationships than anything)
Quote: Getting out of a relationship with #them# is like trying to get out of Iraq.
Reading Te's latest CSA fic, I'm slightly disturbed by myself. I then I remembered that after watching The Devil's Rejects, I had some mental imagery of if I had been one of the victims, I'd have faked the whole, "don't hurt me, I'll do anything you want" with (any of) the guys, then bit off his penis (and testes), (and grinning, with blood over my teeth and running down my chin), then strangling him with the rope tying my arms together. Except, damn, I just tried it, and my proportions have changed since I was a child (well, duh), but I can no longer pull my arms round from behind my back. Bugger.
Anyway, and another was being in the room and just laughing like a crazy girl, because damn, if I really thought they were serial killers and I *wasn't* going to get out alive (ie they been all over the news, no survivors), fuck it, I wouldn't do what they said.
Anyway, so these were my *positive* mental 'what I would do in this situation' type things.