And here's to you, Mrs. Robinson
Tonight I sit here at my computer. For much of the evening, a curious sensation has burdened me, and until now I haven't been able to pinpoint it. It was not a sentiment of pure sadness, or relief, or anxiety, or even curiosity, but rather an amalgam of them. It was the simple recognition of finality which I've been ruminating on. Life is a process, there aren't specifically defined stages in it, and nothing happens all at once. However, there are certain moments which strike you as milestones. When they occur, they stick in your mind to define all of your experiences up to that time. I remember my first day going to Stuart Hall, my middleschool, down to the color of the sky outside. I remember the first day of high school. And I also recall the precise instant I was driving home at 3:00pm on a Thursday when I realized that I had just completed high-school.
Currently I'm pondering the fact that I have reached the next checkpoint. Tomorrow is my last exam for college. I'm not particularly worried about it, as my cavalier attitude towards schoolwork has developed an imperviousness over the years. However, it does mark a finale, the denouement of my scholastic career. Supposedly this is the point where all of your work, effort, and perseverance is supposed to culminate in a grand introduction to the real world, but I haven't expected that to happen for some time now. School has always been a disillusioning process for me, ever since not being challenged as far back as middle-school when I actually gave a damn. I always looked at it as a barrier and an obstacle, as in "well I don't have to care today, because none of this really matters" approach. However, I find myself in the position where all of that is about to be over.
I'm not afraid of what is to come, I never have been. However, the transition is bittersweet. I've always had it easy, I admit that, no pressure, no consequences. I managed my time as I thought would be appropriate, giving deference to liberty. I've always yearned for something more, in business, in racing, but I was still a student I suppose. Now I simultaneously am confronted with the prospect of an open world where I actually have to step up to the plate, as well as the realization that school really wasn't that bad. Like much of reminiscing, I tend to block out the tedium in exchange for good experiences with good friends, but nonetheless, school always had a degree of comfort and stability to it.
Now it truly is my turn to be an adult. Like I said earlier, this responsibility did not just creep up on me, I've expected and planned for it for awhile. However, now I can put a date on it. The funny thing is that this moment right now, will stick in my memory forever, and will symbolize the end of one chapter of my life and the slow but sure procession into the next.
Currently I'm pondering the fact that I have reached the next checkpoint. Tomorrow is my last exam for college. I'm not particularly worried about it, as my cavalier attitude towards schoolwork has developed an imperviousness over the years. However, it does mark a finale, the denouement of my scholastic career. Supposedly this is the point where all of your work, effort, and perseverance is supposed to culminate in a grand introduction to the real world, but I haven't expected that to happen for some time now. School has always been a disillusioning process for me, ever since not being challenged as far back as middle-school when I actually gave a damn. I always looked at it as a barrier and an obstacle, as in "well I don't have to care today, because none of this really matters" approach. However, I find myself in the position where all of that is about to be over.
I'm not afraid of what is to come, I never have been. However, the transition is bittersweet. I've always had it easy, I admit that, no pressure, no consequences. I managed my time as I thought would be appropriate, giving deference to liberty. I've always yearned for something more, in business, in racing, but I was still a student I suppose. Now I simultaneously am confronted with the prospect of an open world where I actually have to step up to the plate, as well as the realization that school really wasn't that bad. Like much of reminiscing, I tend to block out the tedium in exchange for good experiences with good friends, but nonetheless, school always had a degree of comfort and stability to it.
Now it truly is my turn to be an adult. Like I said earlier, this responsibility did not just creep up on me, I've expected and planned for it for awhile. However, now I can put a date on it. The funny thing is that this moment right now, will stick in my memory forever, and will symbolize the end of one chapter of my life and the slow but sure procession into the next.