Dear Mother Nature:
I awoke this morning to find that it was only 35 degrees outside. This is not what i expect to see during spring break. Apparently the faeries have withheld the memo from you letting you know that it was in fact Spring. Why else would you have allowed Jack Frost to be distributing this white crystalline substance that was falling outside my window. Please contact him and order him to cease and desist because I hate that snow crap. I'm tired of winter and having to build a fire in the woodstove (like it would kill any of the three men at my house to do it). I want to see my pretty purple flowers out front. Thanks for your help.
Sincerely,
Your frozen friend