So close...damn
Well, I saw eric. He wanted me which was PART of my goal. I mean he wanted me sexually again, but not as a gf. I am not that kind of a girl. I used to be, with him anyway. I used to just let him use me. Not anymore though, I try anyway. I tried so hard this trip, he was doing everything right and it took all of my strength. Today he was texting me all day with the first one saying "i'm thinking about you" and just other text like that all day. Things like "I miss you", "We don't see eachother enough" etc. Then AS SOON as I validated those feelings. POOF. he disappeared and the text stopped. DAMN. I was sooooo close. But this only makes me a stronger person in the end. It makes me more motivated that is for sure. I also sent him this song as a last word. Just to remind him that we are like Ross and Rachel. It's never off the table.
"It's Not Over"
My tears run down like razorblades and no, I'm not the one to blame: it's you or is it me?
And all the words we never say come out and now we are all ashamed. And there is no sense
In playing games, when you done all you can do.
But now it's over, it's over. Why is it over? We had the chance to make it. Now it's over,
It's over. It can't be over. I wish that I could take it back, but it's over.
I lose myself in all these fights; I lose my sense of wrong and right. I cry, I cry. I'm
Shaking from the pain that's in my head. I just want to crawl into my bed and throw away
The life that I led. But I won't let it die. But I won't let it die.
But it's over, it's over. Why is it over? We had the chance to make it. Now it's over,
It's over. It can't be over. I wish that I could take it back.
I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart. Don't say this wont last forever. You're breaking
My, you're breaking my heart. Don't tell that we will never be together. We could be over
And over, we could be forever.
I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart. Don't say this wont last forever. You're breaking
My, you're breaking my heart. Don't tell that we will never be together. We could be over
And over, we could be forever.
It's not over. It's not over, it's never over, unless you let it take you, it's not over,
It's not over, it's not over, unless you let it break you. It's not over.
"It's Not Over"
My tears run down like razorblades and no, I'm not the one to blame: it's you or is it me?
And all the words we never say come out and now we are all ashamed. And there is no sense
In playing games, when you done all you can do.
But now it's over, it's over. Why is it over? We had the chance to make it. Now it's over,
It's over. It can't be over. I wish that I could take it back, but it's over.
I lose myself in all these fights; I lose my sense of wrong and right. I cry, I cry. I'm
Shaking from the pain that's in my head. I just want to crawl into my bed and throw away
The life that I led. But I won't let it die. But I won't let it die.
But it's over, it's over. Why is it over? We had the chance to make it. Now it's over,
It's over. It can't be over. I wish that I could take it back.
I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart. Don't say this wont last forever. You're breaking
My, you're breaking my heart. Don't tell that we will never be together. We could be over
And over, we could be forever.
I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart. Don't say this wont last forever. You're breaking
My, you're breaking my heart. Don't tell that we will never be together. We could be over
And over, we could be forever.
It's not over. It's not over, it's never over, unless you let it take you, it's not over,
It's not over, it's not over, unless you let it break you. It's not over.