Updatageness fer shure
Ok, so its one of those rare occasions where I just feell ike typing to all you fine, oustanding people of society! Oh wait *looks* its just you guys. I musta been dreaming again. LOL!
Ok, so not much has been goin on lately. I hadta fix my car last week. The front breaks went bad this time. That was a fun time. Jason (brother in law) and I did it, so all it cost me was parts, which I got brand new at a discount. So that was a good thing.
What else to talk about...hmmm...lets see here....also Last week I was working on a computer at my uncles body shop. SOmeone eff'd with it and so now i has 2 viruses in it. One of which being a dialer. the other a download.trojan worm. So thats always a fun time. Especially when the computer in mention has porn ads continuously pop up due to the viruses. Which by the way, I cant get out of it. I went to www.symantec.com/search. Looked the two viruses up and got specific instructions on how to take them out. It didnt work. Everytime I went to do what it said, it wouldnt do nothin. Kept tellin me I typed invalid commands and such. So either their virus removal instructions suck. Or Im more of a dumbass than I thought.
Speaking of dumbass me. Im sure you've all been wondering what the big deal has been with me lately. How Ive seemed, I dunno...distant I guess youd call it. Quiet and well, just not my normal damn self. Yeah thats changed slightly. Can ya tell?
Well Im bout to tell you all just what the deal has been with me lately. Ive been goin through my lil depression phase again. Unfortunately for me, I do things when Im like that. Things I have swor before that Id never do again. This is really hard for me to say right here and now. Cuz I know prolly a few of you if not all will be extremely upset with me. For the past, I dunno, few weeks, Ive been...well...uhh...doing something thats green, inhaled and that kills brain cells (though I doubt I have any left to kill). Now I know what your all saying to yourselves right now. "Im gonna kill that little bastard". Well Im sorry, I dont know how it happened really. I never do actually..notice how that works with me? I just, neeeded to relax and forget about shit. Alcohol isnt really a choice for me anymore....comin up on 3 years for that one by the way. Only here recently with the sudden tragic passing of Eddie Guerrrero have I realised just what I have done.
Dont ask me how. Dont ask me why. Just somethin about that. When I heard it, read it, what have you, I stopped and jsut took a real hard look at my life. Why do I do this? Why do I not learn from this mistake. I do it time and time again? EVerytime I just say to myself. "A lil bit aint gonna hurt me. I'll be aight" Then its like Emeril and BAM!! Im right back to being exactly what I dont want to be anymore, a pothead.
Alot of you prolly cant understand alot of why I did it to begin with. Cuz I know most of you have never smoked pot. At least not to my knowledge. A few of you have though. So you know the feeling, you know about the whole calming you down, making you hungry as shit feeling. Im not sayin that because of that you should condone it. Im noit saying that you should like, rip my head off either. Just stating facts I suppose.
So now, because of my one mistake, Im paying for it. its November 22nd, 2005 and I have no money because I blew it all on drugs. I have 10 more days until I get my monthly paycheck from the state. Proably around half a tank of gas in my car. I still have christmas to buy for my mom, dad, sister, brother in law, neice, nephew, and uncle. Pay insurance, the water bill and prolly another bill for my mom to help out.
So I guess Im going to try and situate my life back out. Find a way, any way to get over this type of thing. I cant go and smoke a bowl everytime I get a lil depressed. Cuz when I do, I pick the habbit right back up. They say old habbits are hard to break. Well whoever said that was right. Cuz this one sure is hard as fuck for me to break.
Anyways, there really isnt much left to talk about. health otherwise is the same. Kidneys still dont work worth a fuck. Im still getting old. Im still 22. Im still a loser. So who the fuck cares right? Wow, Im depressed again. Thats just fucking great. Who the fuck cares though, right?
Right.
until next time,
C
Ok, so not much has been goin on lately. I hadta fix my car last week. The front breaks went bad this time. That was a fun time. Jason (brother in law) and I did it, so all it cost me was parts, which I got brand new at a discount. So that was a good thing.
What else to talk about...hmmm...lets see here....also Last week I was working on a computer at my uncles body shop. SOmeone eff'd with it and so now i has 2 viruses in it. One of which being a dialer. the other a download.trojan worm. So thats always a fun time. Especially when the computer in mention has porn ads continuously pop up due to the viruses. Which by the way, I cant get out of it. I went to www.symantec.com/search. Looked the two viruses up and got specific instructions on how to take them out. It didnt work. Everytime I went to do what it said, it wouldnt do nothin. Kept tellin me I typed invalid commands and such. So either their virus removal instructions suck. Or Im more of a dumbass than I thought.
Speaking of dumbass me. Im sure you've all been wondering what the big deal has been with me lately. How Ive seemed, I dunno...distant I guess youd call it. Quiet and well, just not my normal damn self. Yeah thats changed slightly. Can ya tell?
Well Im bout to tell you all just what the deal has been with me lately. Ive been goin through my lil depression phase again. Unfortunately for me, I do things when Im like that. Things I have swor before that Id never do again. This is really hard for me to say right here and now. Cuz I know prolly a few of you if not all will be extremely upset with me. For the past, I dunno, few weeks, Ive been...well...uhh...doing something thats green, inhaled and that kills brain cells (though I doubt I have any left to kill). Now I know what your all saying to yourselves right now. "Im gonna kill that little bastard". Well Im sorry, I dont know how it happened really. I never do actually..notice how that works with me? I just, neeeded to relax and forget about shit. Alcohol isnt really a choice for me anymore....comin up on 3 years for that one by the way. Only here recently with the sudden tragic passing of Eddie Guerrrero have I realised just what I have done.
Dont ask me how. Dont ask me why. Just somethin about that. When I heard it, read it, what have you, I stopped and jsut took a real hard look at my life. Why do I do this? Why do I not learn from this mistake. I do it time and time again? EVerytime I just say to myself. "A lil bit aint gonna hurt me. I'll be aight" Then its like Emeril and BAM!! Im right back to being exactly what I dont want to be anymore, a pothead.
Alot of you prolly cant understand alot of why I did it to begin with. Cuz I know most of you have never smoked pot. At least not to my knowledge. A few of you have though. So you know the feeling, you know about the whole calming you down, making you hungry as shit feeling. Im not sayin that because of that you should condone it. Im noit saying that you should like, rip my head off either. Just stating facts I suppose.
So now, because of my one mistake, Im paying for it. its November 22nd, 2005 and I have no money because I blew it all on drugs. I have 10 more days until I get my monthly paycheck from the state. Proably around half a tank of gas in my car. I still have christmas to buy for my mom, dad, sister, brother in law, neice, nephew, and uncle. Pay insurance, the water bill and prolly another bill for my mom to help out.
So I guess Im going to try and situate my life back out. Find a way, any way to get over this type of thing. I cant go and smoke a bowl everytime I get a lil depressed. Cuz when I do, I pick the habbit right back up. They say old habbits are hard to break. Well whoever said that was right. Cuz this one sure is hard as fuck for me to break.
Anyways, there really isnt much left to talk about. health otherwise is the same. Kidneys still dont work worth a fuck. Im still getting old. Im still 22. Im still a loser. So who the fuck cares right? Wow, Im depressed again. Thats just fucking great. Who the fuck cares though, right?
Right.
until next time,
C